Girls...assistance needed.

[CrabGirl]

I'm going to a wedding tomorrow and this evening I have to:

Dye my hair
Apply fake tan
Do my nails, hands and feet,
Sort my unruly eyebrows out
ETC

What order do I do it in?

Bath first and then hair?
Or hair first, then bath...

I just don't know :(

[Squeamous]

Omg, I'm feeling your struggle sister.

Hair first, because then you can leave it in the towel to dry a bit before styling it as you're having a bath and it will be held out of the water.

What are you doing with regards to body hair? If shaving do it in the bath, if using a cream leave it on to work while washing hair then you can wash it off with the shower head before running the bath (while your hair is up remember).

Eyebrows in bath, because the hot water softens your face and it doesn't hurt so much. Don't forget the towel and mirror and tweezers etc before you get in the bath to avoid having to get out for them.

Exfoliate while in bath to make sure fake tan takes properly.

Get out, dry yourself, apply fake tan, then do hair standing up while it dries. Blow drying it now will save time in the morning.

Nails, hands and feet, come last.

Good luck soldier, we're all behind you!

[The Flying Cow]

There should be a Gruesome Female Stuff Section.


-Sherman :/

[Hairbautt]

Good luck soldier, we're all behind you!
http://www.smileygenerator.us/t/temp/WOOT3/mellow.gif

[CrabGirl]

Omg, I'm feeling your struggle sister.

Hair first, because then you can leave it in the towel to dry a bit before styling it as you're having a bath and it will be held out of the water.

What are you doing with regards to body hair? If shaving do it in the bath, if using a cream leave it on to work while washing hair then you can wash it off with the shower head before running the bath (while your hair is up remember).

Eyebrows in bath, because the hot water softens your face and it doesn't hurt so much. Don't forget the towel and mirror and tweezers etc before you get in the bath to avoid having to get out for them.

Exfoliate while in bath to make sure fake tan takes properly.

Get out, dry yourself, apply fake tan, then do hair standing up while it dries. Blow drying it now will save time in the morning.

Nails, hands and feet, come last.

Good luck soldier, we're all behind you!

I love you. Thank you! You are now my womens-things hero.

It's just so much work to go watch my friend go get married in a cave, then go and dance in a marquee (have you SEEN the weather down here - its pelting it down)in a field.

Actually I'm really excited about the cave

http://www.carnglaze.com/weddings_1.0.htm

See you guys in about 6 hours!

[Squeamous]

It's a military operation, being a girl :yup:

[Squeamous]

I love you. Thank you! You are now my womens-things hero.

It's just so much work to go watch my friend go get married in a cave, then go and dance in a marquee (have you SEEN the weather down here - its pelting it down)in a field.

Actually I'm really excited about the cave

http://www.carnglaze.com/weddings_1.0.htm

See you guys in about 6 hours!

Yup, all in a days work, little lady.

That is such a wonderful idea for a wedding! That's a really original idea. I love it!

No-one but you will know how much effort it takes to look that casually gorgeous :shifty:....except this lot.

[Imagine_If]

Begin with a joint, followed by a beer... :yup:

[Squeamous]

Good luck soldier, we're all behind you!
http://www.smileygenerator.us/t/temp/WOOT3/mellow.gif

Dirty sod :snooty:

[CrabGirl]

I love you. Thank you! You are now my womens-things hero.

It's just so much work to go watch my friend go get married in a cave, then go and dance in a marquee (have you SEEN the weather down here - its pelting it down)in a field.

Actually I'm really excited about the cave

http://www.carnglaze.com/weddings_1.0.htm

See you guys in about 6 hours!

Yup, all in a days work, little lady.

That is such a wonderful idea for a wedding! That's a really original idea. I love it!

No-one but you will know how much effort it takes to look that casually gorgeous :shifty:....except this lot.

I even bought some posh illuminating moisturiser in Boots. Got loads of freebies with it too as they had a makeup pallet free with no.7 and then they were chucking in another makeup box which had out of date vouchers in. Thats the good bit about being a girl.

Yeh the caves are wicked. They do concerts in them from time to time and I really want to go and see Joey and the Lips in December there. I will have just been made redundant and should be feeling flush with me severence and last months wages.

Anyway, to work!

[Guillaume]

It's a military operation, being a girl :yup:
D'you mean, at the slightest error someone dies in a horrible fashion? :cry:

[Squeamous]

I even bought some posh illuminating moisturiser in Boots. Got loads of freebies with it too as they had a makeup pallet free with no.7 and then they were chucking in another makeup box which had out of date vouchers in. Thats the good bit about being a girl.

Yeh the caves are wicked. They do concerts in them from time to time and I really want to go and see Joey and the Lips in December there. I will have just been made redundant and should be feeling flush with me severence and last months wages.

Anyway, to work!

Boots are evil. I get that free magazine of theirs and now I've got a list of half a dozen bottles of gunk I want to buy tomorrow :pinch:. No 7 had a 3 for 2 recently though, that was good :smilie4:.

By now I reckon you're onto eyebrow plucking :yup:

[Squeamous]

D'you mean, at the slightest error someone dies in a horrible fashion? :cry:

Or gets maimed. Lets not be a negative nancy :snooty:.

[CrabGirl]

I even bought some posh illuminating moisturiser in Boots. Got loads of freebies with it too as they had a makeup pallet free with no.7 and then they were chucking in another makeup box which had out of date vouchers in. Thats the good bit about being a girl.

Yeh the caves are wicked. They do concerts in them from time to time and I really want to go and see Joey and the Lips in December there. I will have just been made redundant and should be feeling flush with me severence and last months wages.

Anyway, to work!

Boots are evil. I get that free magazine of theirs and now I've got a list of half a dozen bottles of gunk I want to buy tomorrow :pinch:. No 7 had a 3 for 2 recently though, that was good :smilie4:.

By now I reckon you're onto eyebrow plucking :yup:

Hair is a nice shade of dark red, forehead is a nice shade of dark red, as are ears. Bathroom is a nice shade of dark red also.
Body is dehaired, exfoliated, buffed, polished, fake-tanned, and shiny. Left Ankle is bleeding slightly. Hands and feet are soft and youthful looking. Brows are plucked and groomed into shape. I in short, no longer resemble a dowdy yeti.

Just nails and any extras I think of to do, but having a break for dinner.

[Mr.sharer]

that is soo girly gay and overdramatic ..

fake

:dabs:

and mega fail

[Hairbautt]

Can we get pics? I mean if you're doing all this work... :whistling

[RedRansom]

Can we get pics? I mean if you're doing all this work... :whistling
I would say this :dry: lol :-P

[CrabGirl]

I might post some from the wedding if i'm drunk enough.

right now all you'd get was mid-process. That is cheating

[Guillaume]

Could we settle for before/after shots, then?

Where's Mulder BTW, he should be doing the asking.

[The Flying Cow]

I'd do just with the after shots, to be honest.


-Sherman

[CrabGirl]

Heres a before

http://lrkgoldendoodles.homestead.com/files/poodlestandardphantom.jpg

[Guillaume]

Well now I can see why the hips would be a problem with the green dress.
Totally wrong shape.

[CrabGirl]

lol! The green dress isnt tomorrows wedding. Thats not till the end of september. Got a little black and white number for tomorrow.

[Squeamous]

Hair is a nice shade of dark red, forehead is a nice shade of dark red, as are ears. Bathroom is a nice shade of dark red also.
Body is dehaired, exfoliated, buffed, polished, fake-tanned, and shiny. Left Ankle is bleeding slightly. Hands and feet are soft and youthful looking. Brows are plucked and groomed into shape. I in short, no longer resemble a dowdy yeti.

Just nails and any extras I think of to do, but having a break for dinner.

Quite right, got to keep your strength up :yup:. Have you got the outfit and co-ordinating undies sorted?

[CrabGirl]

Hair is a nice shade of dark red, forehead is a nice shade of dark red, as are ears. Bathroom is a nice shade of dark red also.
Body is dehaired, exfoliated, buffed, polished, fake-tanned, and shiny. Left Ankle is bleeding slightly. Hands and feet are soft and youthful looking. Brows are plucked and groomed into shape. I in short, no longer resemble a dowdy yeti.

Just nails and any extras I think of to do, but having a break for dinner.

Quite right, got to keep your strength up :yup:. Have you got the outfit and co-ordinating undies sorted?

The Nails are done and are dark pink. The dress is black and white and not too booby ...

As for undies... :naughty:

[Hairbautt]

I might post some from the wedding if i'm drunk enough.

right now all you'd get was mid-process. That is cheating
Awesome to the max.

[lynx]

All the best weddings used to be in caves.

I'll never understand why they did away with the wooden club. :sneaky:

[Squeamous]

The Nails are done and are dark pink. The dress is black and white and not too booby ...

As for undies... :naughty:

:O

Careful. In this weather you're liable to leave your undercarriage behind if you sit on a plastic seat :pinch:.

[CrabGirl]

I am in the bin... wedding was good, drinking was good, dancing was good, pissing around a very wet field was good, getting an hour sleep in the back of a van was good, starting drinking again upon waking was good, coming home and deciding to mever move again was very very good.

As I said, in teh fecking bin.

[Skweeky]

Can we have a before, after and after picture? :lol:

[CrabGirl]

Oh jesus, I'm not inflicting the wreckage which is me upon the world. I am an utter state and I have I am a Lez written on my arm by a smartass 11 year old, bruises on my legs from pushing stuck cars out of a muddy field, and red red eyes.

[Skweeky]

Awwww come on! Show us :lol:

[Squeamous]

Was the Lez moniker because you pushed more cars than any of the fellas? :pinch:

[CrabGirl]

no it was because i wrote twit all over the 11 year old.

He had to take it one step further didn't he.

[Acid_death69]

slap him them or poke him in the eyes:D

[Squeamous]

no it was because i wrote twit all over the 11 year old.

He had to take it one step further didn't he.

You should have taken his virginity. That woulda learned him :fist:.

[CrabGirl]

no it was because i wrote twit all over the 11 year old.

He had to take it one step further didn't he.

You should have taken his virginity. That woulda learned him :fist:.

Ewww... he was being a cheeky little sod so me and his dad chased him round the field, pinned him down and wrote all over him.

[Squeamous]

Sounds like sexy time to me :smilie4:

[Acid_death69]

frankly i dont think he suffered enough. more action needs to be taken

[Squeamous]

How much action? :unsure:

[CrabGirl]

Sick sick sick.

I had an hours kip in a porno-van but there was no sexi-time.

[Squeamous]

Sick sick sick.

I had an hours kip in a porno-van but there was no sexi-time.

I'll stop now :sick:

Sounds like an excellent time was had :happy:

[Acid_death69]

How much action? :unsure:
making him really drunk and then watch him suffer:P tis always fun watching kids drunk lol


Sick sick sick.

I had an hours kip in a porno-van but there was no sexi-time.

what made it a porno van?

[CrabGirl]

The fact that it was quilted inside and it had electric shades which came down at the touch of a button whilst nina simone started playing gently the background. I couldn't sleep I was so busy laughing at its tackiness.

[chalice]

The fact that it was quilted inside and it had electric shades which came down at the touch of a button whilst nina simone started playing gently the background. I couldn't sleep I was so busy laughing at its tackiness.

Sounds like the best van ever.

I would watch more porn if it had Nina Simone soundtracking.

[CrabGirl]

Agreed.

Right I'm off to bed. I feel fecking rough as badgers nads.

[Acid_death69]

lol fair enough, nyt

[Alien5]

lightweight.

[CrabGirl]

I still don't feel well. I think this is more than a hangover.
Ughh.

[Alien5]

I feel the same, i only drank 2 thirds of a bottle of wine last night and about 50 roll-ups.

[CrabGirl]

I feel the same, i only drank 2 thirds of a bottle of wine last night and about 50 roll-ups.

Lol and you're calling ME a lightweight!

I rather think I've contracted some disease, everything hurts and I'm going back to bed. :(

[chalice]

I feel the same, i only drank 2 thirds of a bottle of wine last night and about 50 roll-ups.

There's your problem right there.

You shouldn't drink roll-ups. No wonder you feel like shite. :noes:

[Alien5]

:sick: waking up to the smell of stale smoke with a hangover, and talking about drinking wine mixed with roll-ups.

You're supposed to be the FST pro wine taster/expert/drinker person, not me :)

i just walk into the local granary and choose a pretty looking bottle and say "gonna try this one today".

I feel as rough as a broom.

[CrabGirl]

I'm having sardines on toast for breakfast. Imagine the smell of that!

[Alien5]

UUGGHHH!!

I just made fried egg and mushrooms and cawffee

what you got planned for today?

Ive taken some Ibuprofen for the headacheness

[CrabGirl]

UUGGHHH!!

I just made fried egg and mushrooms and cawffee

what you got planned for today?

Ive taken some Ibuprofen for the headacheness

You breakfast sounds like win.

Today I plan to do some housework, yoga, revision for my course, go to work at 4 and other things...

In actuality I will prolly end up sitting here feeling like crap all day and not do any of it.

You?

[Alien5]

same, except for the Housework, Yoga, Coursework & i don't go in today ftw :)

today i will be mostly watching big brother live feed and great big boobies 4.