PDA

View Full Version : The Fun Thread!



Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:00 AM
in part of my keep the lounge alive campaign :lol: :lol: :lol:


i think we should make a fun thread every post should be something fun either pictures link etc.......


i'll start with this link here (http://www.ingleby.com)

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:01 AM
http://www.findvideos.com/
Sounds good to me

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:02 AM
booo stole me thread biatch :angry: :D :P

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:03 AM
fun fun fun :lol:




:01:

GHOST 1337
05-02-2004, 02:03 AM
Originally posted by Azzz@2 May 2004 - 02:00
in part of my keep the lounge alive campaign :lol: :lol: :lol:


i think we should make a fun thread every post should be something fun either pictures link etc.......


i'll start with this link here (http://www.ingleby.com)
http://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/user_images/pics/1/1959000/ngbbs405e55009b700.jpg

there ya' go. :)

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:04 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:02
booo stole me thread biatch :angry: :D :P
mines better though :lol: :lol: :lol:



HERE A GREAT SITE FOR GAMES AND ANIME (http://www.mlanime.com)

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:06 AM
Originally posted by Azzz+1 May 2004 - 22:04--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Azzz @ 1 May 2004 - 22:04)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:02
booo stole me thread biatch :angry:&nbsp; :D&nbsp; :P
mines better though :lol: :lol: :lol:



HERE A GREAT SITE FOR GAMES AND ANIME (http://www.mlanime.com) [/b][/quote]
http://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/cwm/cwm/piss2.gifhttp://instagiber.net/smiliesdotcom/cwm/cwm/piss2.gifhttp://smilies.jeeptalk.org/contrib/edoom/throwup.gif

Monkeee
05-02-2004, 02:07 AM
AXE Deodorant + Lighter = FLAME THROWER

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:08 AM
Someone had fun (http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge.JPG)

masterpiece21
05-02-2004, 02:09 AM
A man desparately trying to get laid (http://www.zerosexlife.com) :D

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:09 AM
http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/ziggy.gif http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/KILL_ME.jpg http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/MEN.gif http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/YHASP.jpg

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:10 AM
a have a limerick&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; :lol: any young users of the forum avert your eyes now please :lol:


JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL SO JACK CUD LICK JILLS FANNY, JACK GOT A SHOCK AND A MOUTHFUL OF COCK COS JILLS A FUCKIN TRANNY :lol: :lol: :lol:

4th gen
05-02-2004, 02:10 AM
Originally posted by danb@2 May 2004 - 01:08
Someone had fun (http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge.JPG)
Anusol?? :unsure:

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:12 AM
Originally posted by 4th gen+2 May 2004 - 03:10--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (4th gen @ 2 May 2004 - 03:10)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-danb@2 May 2004 - 01:08
Someone had fun (http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge.JPG)
Anusol?? :unsure: [/b][/quote]
it was research for Spider_dude


I will find the link :lol:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:13 AM
Originally posted by 4th gen+2 May 2004 - 01:10--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (4th gen @ 2 May 2004 - 01:10)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-danb@2 May 2004 - 01:08
Someone had fun (http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge.JPG)
Anusol?? :unsure: [/b][/quote]
i wasnt aware that dan was a spammer :o :o :o

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:13 AM
The link (http://filesharingtalk.com/index.php?showtopic=111144) :lol: :lol:

Had to find it to prove my innocence :P

4th gen
05-02-2004, 02:14 AM
Originally posted by danb@2 May 2004 - 01:13
The link (http://filesharingtalk.com/index.php?showtopic=111144) :lol: :lol:

Had to find it to prove my innocence :P
I couldn&#39;t believe you more

(Sarcasm)

:rolleyes:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:14 AM
i noticed my name was mentioned in that thread <_<


:lol: :lol: :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:15 AM
http://www.jerseydrunks.com/wall/crap.jpg

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:15 AM
Originally posted by 4th gen+2 May 2004 - 03:14--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (4th gen @ 2 May 2004 - 03:14)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-danb@2 May 2004 - 01:13
The link (http://filesharingtalk.com/index.php?showtopic=111144)&nbsp; :lol:&nbsp; :lol:

Had to find it to prove my innocence&nbsp; :P
I couldn&#39;t believe you more

(Sarcasm)

:rolleyes: [/b][/quote]
Did your jeans shrink in the end? :P

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:15 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/danbar-danblounge.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/danbar-danblounge.jpg')
ID JUST LIKE TO POINT MYSELF OUT

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:16 AM
http://www.shaky.com/images/new-crap.jpg

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:16 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 03:15
http://www.jerseydrunks.com/wall/crap.jpg
nice :(

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:17 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:15
http://www.jerseydrunks.com/wall/crap.jpg
that is absolutly digusting :lol: :lol: :lol:


keep em cumin :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:18 AM
http://www.shaky.com/images/3legged.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:19 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.prestigenow.com/tedscomics/images/crap.gif' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.prestigenow.com/tedscomics/images/crap.gif')

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:20 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:19
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://www.prestigenow.com/tedscomics/images/crap.gif' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://www.prestigenow.com/tedscomics/images/crap.gif)
:lol: :lol: :lol: LMAO

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:21 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 03:15
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/danbar-danblounge.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/danbar-danblounge.jpg)
ID JUST LIKE TO POINT MYSELF OUT
Image Resized
[img]http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge2.JPG' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://server6.uploadit.org/files/danbar-danblounge2.JPG')

More for you to help out :P

4th gen
05-02-2004, 02:22 AM
Originally posted by danb+2 May 2004 - 01:15--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (danb @ 2 May 2004 - 01:15)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
Originally posted by 4th gen@2 May 2004 - 03:14
<!--QuoteBegin-danb@2 May 2004 - 01:13
The link (http://filesharingtalk.com/index.php?showtopic=111144)&nbsp; :lol:&nbsp; :lol:

Had to find it to prove my innocence&nbsp; :P
I couldn&#39;t believe you more

(Sarcasm)

:rolleyes:
Did your jeans shrink in the end? :P [/b][/quote]
Luckily, no. After a short period of wearing them, they were back to their original size :)

Spammer (http://www.arap78.dsl.pipex.com/172.JPG)

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:22 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~chapinr/riaa/Priceless%20-%20Biting%20The%20Hand%20That%20Feeds%20You%20-%20Hysterically%20Funny%20Shit%20(RIAA%20-%20The%20Last%20Dinosaur).avi.mp3.txt.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~chapinr/riaa/Priceless%20-%20Biting%20The%20Hand%20That%20Feeds%20You%20-%20Hysterically%20Funny%20Shit%20(RIAA%20-%20The%20Last%20Dinosaur).avi.mp3.txt.jpg')

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:24 AM
:lol: :lol:

Its a shame that feature doesn&#39;t exist no more :lol: :lol:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:24 AM
http://www.citypaper.com/2001-09-12/funny-2.jpg



:lol:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:26 AM
kinda old but i like it http://www.ebaumsworld.com/riaa-psa.html

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:27 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~chapinr/riaa/Boycott%20The%20RIAA%20(RIAA%20-%20Bad%20Business%20For%20American%20Business).jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~chapinr/riaa/Boycott%20The%20RIAA%20(RIAA%20-%20Bad%20Business%20For%20American%20Business).jpg')

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:27 AM
http://www.4humor.com/fv/pictures/matrix.jpg

:lol: :lol:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:30 AM
http://www.uglypeople.com/ugly_women.php

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:31 AM
http://www.mcspotlight.org/campaigns/current/subverts/subvert_pix/bullshit.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:32 AM
http://utenti.lycos.it/datuma/bull24.jpg

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:33 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:32
http://utenti.lycos.it/datuma/bull24.jpg
:lol: :lol: :lol:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:35 AM
i clicked it 100 times http://button.community.net.uk/cgi/button

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:36 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 01:35
i clicked it 100 times http://button.community.net.uk/cgi/button
im on my way to 1000 :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:38 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@1 May 2004 - 22:35
i clicked it 100 times http://button.community.net.uk/cgi/button
This button has now been pressed 3059579 times. :01:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:39 AM
that is goin in my favourites :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:41 AM
http://www.tampatantrum.com/ispy/retroposters.jpg

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:41 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 01:41
http://www.tampatantrum.com/ispy/retroposters.jpg
:lol: :lol: :lol:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 02:42 AM
in 1h post a pic of how meany times you clicked it im at 236 now&#33;&#33;

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:43 AM
the button started to scare me so i left :unsure:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:48 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.morgan.20fr.com/images/battle_beauty.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.morgan.20fr.com/images/battle_beauty.jpg')

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:49 AM
Originally posted by Azzz@2 May 2004 - 03:43
the button started to scare me so i left :unsure:
Its humour is fucked up <_<

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:50 AM
http://www.polishmusic.ca/skok/cds/polskie/grupy/s/stankiew/stank_ep.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 02:51 AM
http://www.cigarfar.dk/mid.jpg

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 02:54 AM
CLCIK HERE (http://www.ingleby.com/Junk/Games/helicopter/junk-x4files-helicopter.htm)


this link is to a game

my highscore is 1181 your task is to beat that score ,post screenshots&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;

DanB
05-02-2004, 02:57 AM
:01: boring :01:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:00 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/BUTTON.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/BUTTON.jpg') just started 10min ago B)

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:00 AM
Originally posted by Azzz@1 May 2004 - 22:54
CLCIK HERE (http://www.ingleby.com/Junk/Games/helicopter/junk-x4files-helicopter.htm)


this link is to a game

my highscore is 1181 your task is to beat that score ,post screenshots&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;
:P booooooooooooooo&#33;&#33;&#33;

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:01 AM
http://www.bureauangenent.nl/smart/images/foto_smart_carwash.gif

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:03 AM
http://www.joenetsfan.com/NetsSeason2001_2002/Backlash2001_2002Assets/BacklashNetsNut.gif

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:06 AM
is that a sport peanut?

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:07 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@1 May 2004 - 23:06
is that a sport peanut?
yup ;)

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 03:07 AM
goodnight everyone im going to bed


make sure to keep the fun alive though while im away :lol:



goodnight god bless :)

DanB
05-02-2004, 03:09 AM
night night azzz :D

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:10 AM
Originally posted by Azzz@1 May 2004 - 23:07
goodnight everyone im going to bed


make sure to keep the fun alive though while im away :lol:



goodnight god bless :)
close thread :angry:


http://auction.thing.net/closed.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:11 AM
http://www.cazaa.dk/images/funny%20redigeret.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:13 AM
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/KILL_ME.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:13 AM
Originally posted by gungrave@2 May 2004 - 03:13
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/KILL_ME.jpg
hey thats mine

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:14 AM
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/images.jpg :blink:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:15 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez+2 May 2004 - 03:13--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (ziggyjuarez @ 2 May 2004 - 03:13)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-gungrave@2 May 2004 - 03:13
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/KILL_ME.jpg
hey thats mine [/b][/quote]
:ph34r: mine now :ph34r:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:15 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://sapphire.sourceforge.net/files/funny.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://sapphire.sourceforge.net/files/funny.jpg')
muhahahaha :ph34r:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:18 AM
Originally posted by gungrave+2 May 2004 - 03:15--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (gungrave @ 2 May 2004 - 03:15)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 03:13
<!--QuoteBegin-gungrave@2 May 2004 - 03:13
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/KILL_ME.jpg
hey thats mine
:ph34r: mine now :ph34r: [/b][/quote]
bully :sad1:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:18 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.theaisle.org/cartoons/2003/5/30/Funny-Cide_Democrats-large.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.theaisle.org/cartoons/2003/5/30/Funny-Cide_Democrats-large.jpg')

DanB
05-02-2004, 03:18 AM
Originally posted by gungrave@2 May 2004 - 04:11
http://www.cazaa.dk/images/funny%20redigeret.jpg
scary cats :ph34r:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:19 AM
http://www.coolbrickmovies.com/images/genres/spoof.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:20 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez+2 May 2004 - 03:18--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (ziggyjuarez @ 2 May 2004 - 03:18)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
Originally posted by gungrave@2 May 2004 - 03:15

Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 03:13
<!--QuoteBegin-gungrave@2 May 2004 - 03:13
http://abpni.serverbox.org/mike/New%20Folder/KILL_ME.jpg
hey thats mine
:ph34r: mine now :ph34r:
bully :sad1: [/b][/quote]
http://www.iquiz.co.jp/images/cover/funny%20picture/hey-you.jpg
:ph34r:

DanB
05-02-2004, 03:22 AM
Originally posted by gungrave@2 May 2004 - 04:20

http://www.iquiz.co.jp/images/cover/funny%20picture/hey-you.jpg
:ph34r:
Nice boobs :D

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:22 AM
http://home2.pi.be/bg040126/Humour%20funny%20pics%20jokes_10.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:23 AM
http://www.planetmooncentral.com/inhouse/articles/april_fools/delphi_spoof.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:24 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://jenna.bekkis.com/images/spoof_exam.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://jenna.bekkis.com/images/spoof_exam.jpg')

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:24 AM
http://www.mindfully.org/Jonik/Jonik-Pesticide-Funny-Business.GIF

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:25 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/button2.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/button2.jpg') why is this so fun 4 me?

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:25 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 03:24
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://jenna.bekkis.com/images/spoof_exam.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://jenna.bekkis.com/images/spoof_exam.jpg)
:lol: :lol: got me laughing :lol: :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:25 AM
WARNING HARD CORE GEP

Image Resized
[img]http://www.extra-oomph.com/yummypix/07random_printshit/sonicnet_poster/spoof_elvis.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.extra-oomph.com/yummypix/07random_printshit/sonicnet_poster/spoof_elvis.jpg')



WARNING HARD CORE GEP




:lol: :lol:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:27 AM
http://website.lineone.net/~ha/Images/funny.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:27 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.realitydiversions.com/content/aii/imagemanip/images/You%20are%20What%20You%20Eat%20-%20Poster%20Final.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.realitydiversions.com/content/aii/imagemanip/images/You%20are%20What%20You%20Eat%20-%20Poster%20Final.jpg')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:28 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/diehard800x600.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/diehard800x600.jpg')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:30 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/dogs800x600.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/dogs800x600.jpg')

Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/carthut640x480.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/carthut640x480.jpg')

Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/bunch640x480(1).jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/bunch640x480(1).jpg')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:31 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/notenough800x600.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/notenough800x600.jpg')


Image Resized
[img]http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/blade800x600.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.hippycrap.freeserve.co.uk/jpgs/SouthPark/Movie/blade800x600.jpg')

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:31 AM
http://www.greater-apes.com/Creation/images/dulltoons/Fami0613.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:32 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.videoideas.com/gallery/eric/A%20funny%20picture.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.videoideas.com/gallery/eric/A%20funny%20picture.jpg')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:35 AM
http://laugh-svca.www.conxion.com/media/fl...ime/swilly5.swf (http://laugh-svca.www.conxion.com/media/flash/notime/swilly5.swf)

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:35 AM
http://www.humournet.co.uk/Images/funny_pic10.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:35 AM
cool

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:38 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 03:35
http://laugh-svca.www.conxion.com/media/fl...ime/swilly5.swf (http://laugh-svca.www.conxion.com/media/flash/notime/swilly5.swf)
:lol:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:39 AM
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures65.jpg
wont grow :lol:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:40 AM
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures68.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:42 AM
Image Resized
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures69.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures69.jpg')
Image Resized
[img]http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures70.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures70.jpg')
[img]http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures72.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:42 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/45c3428d.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/45c3428d.jpg')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:43 AM
http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/Deadman.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:44 AM
Originally posted by bujub22@2 May 2004 - 03:43
http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/Deadman.jpg
:lol: :huh: :o :unsure:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:45 AM
http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/Penis.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:45 AM
http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/womens_parking.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:46 AM
http://www.wiganshades.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/images/spicegir.jpg

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:46 AM
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures181.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures182.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures183.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures186.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures190.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 03:48 AM
I NEED A LIFE
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/button3000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/button3000.jpg')

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:49 AM
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures191.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures194.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures195.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures199.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:52 AM
Originally posted by Azzz@1 May 2004 - 22:10
a have a limerick&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; :lol: any young users of the forum avert your eyes now please :lol:


JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL SO JACK CUD LICK JILLS FANNY, JACK GOT A SHOCK AND A MOUTHFUL OF COCK COS JILLS A FUCKIN TRANNY :lol: :lol: :lol:
jack and jill went up the hill to do some hanky panky
jack said ooow&#33;&#33;
jill said aaaaaah&#33;
and out came baby franky&#33; :lol:

yankee doodle went to town riding on a tv
turn channel 68
and saw some naked lady&#39;s :D


yankee doodle went to town riding on a chicken
stuck his finger up his ass .....and called it finger licking&#33;&#33; :P :lol:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 03:54 AM
this had me rofl lol (http://filesharingtalk.com/index.php?showtopic=111335)



:D :rolleyes:

gungrave
05-02-2004, 03:54 AM
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures207.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures209.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures221.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures227.jpg
http://www.funnypicturesgallery.com/funnypics/funny-pictures232.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:07 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://inlet.org/gallery/cartoons/humor.100702.gif' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://inlet.org/gallery/cartoons/humor.100702.gif')

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:08 AM
http://www.bpib.com/images34/humor.jpg

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:09 AM
Image Resized
http://www.haygood.com/jpg/humor.3.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://www.haygood.com/jpg/humor.3.jpg')

[img]http://www.haygood.com/jpg/bubba.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 04:09 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg')
:( :cry1: :sadwalk:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:13 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 00:09
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg)
:( :cry1: :sadwalk:
stop playing it :angry: :frusty:


http://www.theparafiles.com/humor/alien_pee.gif

4th gen
05-02-2004, 04:13 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 03:09
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/4000.jpg)
:( :cry1: :sadwalk:
Are you actualy clicking it or are you using a macro?

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:14 AM
http://pryds.tripod.com/Humor/adam.jpg

http://pryds.tripod.com/Humor/single.jpg

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 04:15 AM
im clicking it,and i cant stop :(
what this macro your talking about :smilie4:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:17 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://web.mit.edu/dmredish/www/wwwMLRF/links/Humor/TrekSimpsons.gif' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://web.mit.edu/dmredish/www/wwwMLRF/links/Humor/TrekSimpsons.gif')





HOW TO KNOW YOU&#39;RE GETTING OLD
You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.
You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine cabinet.
You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends whoexercised.
You know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions.
You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
You sit in a rocking chair and can&#39;t get it going.
Your knees buckle and your belt won&#39;t.
Everything hurts, and what doesn&#39;t hurt, doesn&#39;t work.
The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
You feel like the morning after and you haven&#39;t been anywhere.
A fortune teller offers to read your face.
Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up and down when you see a pretty girl.
The little old gray-headed lady you help across the street is yourwife.
Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D.
Your children begin to look middle aged.
You finally reach the top of the ladder and find it leaningagainst the wrong wall.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:19 AM
Q & A form jokes
Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start&#33;
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: What&#39;s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: Why won&#39;t sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning laywer?
A1: Take your foot off his head.
A2: No.

Q: What&#39;s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
A: The bucket.

Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that&#39;s a shame")?
A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A: There was an empty seat.

Q: What can a goose do, a duck can&#39;t, and a lawyer should?
A: Stick his bill up his ass.

Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can&#39;t understand

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
A. From chasing parked ambulances.

Q. Where can you find a good lawyer?
A. In the cemetary

Q. What&#39;s the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?
A. A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

Q. What&#39;s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A. A vampire only sucks blood at night.

Q. Why to lawyers wear neckties?
A. To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.

Q. What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A. When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.

Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don&#39;t you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Longer Jokes
A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer were asked "How much is 2+2?"
The housewife replies: "Four&#33;".
The accountant says: "I think it&#39;s either 3 or 4. Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time."
The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights and asks in a hushed voice, "How much do you want it to be?"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A man went to a brain store to get some brain for dinner.
He sees a sign remarking on the quality of proffesional brain offerred at this particular brain store. So he asks the butcher:
"How much for Engineer brain?"
"3 dollars an ounce."
"How much for brain?"
"4 dollars an ounce."
"How much for lawyer brain?"
"100 dollars an ounce."
"Why is lawyer brain so much more?"
"Do you know how many lawyers you need to kill to get one ounce of brain?"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?" Tim stood up and proudly said, "She&#39;s a doctor."
"That&#39;s wonderful. How about you, Amie?"
Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."
"Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?"
Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy plays piano in a whorehouse."
The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy&#39;s house and rang the bell. Billy&#39;s father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation.
Billy&#39;s father said, "I&#39;m actually an attorney. How can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the laywer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter and one of his assis- tants took the lawyer by the hands and guided him up to the front of the line, and into a comfortable chair by his desk. The lawyer said, "I don&#39;t mind all this attention, but what makes me so special?"
St. Peter replied, "Well, I&#39;ve added up all the hours for which you billed your clients, and by my calculation you must be about 193 years old&#33;"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Dublin lawyer died in poverty and many barristers of the city sub- scribed to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. "Only a shilling?" said the Justice, "Only a shilling to bury an attorney? Here&#39;s a guinea; go and bury 20 more of them."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A lawyer and a physician had a dispute over precedence. They referred it to Diogenes, who gave it in favor of the lawyer as follows: "Let the thief go first, and the executioner follow."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles.
"My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Pope and a lawyer find themselves together before the Pearly Gates. After a small quantum of time which was spent discussing their respective professions, ol&#39; St. Peter shows up to usher them to their new Heavenly station. After passing out wings, harps, halos and such, St. Pete decides to show them to their new lodgings. Only a brief flight from the welcome, Pete brings them down on the front lawn (cloud-encrusted, natch) of a huge palatial estate with all sorts of lavish trappings. This, Pete announces, is where the lawyer will be spending eternity, (at least until the end of time..) "Hot Dang", the Pope says to His-self, "If he&#39;s getting a place like this, I can hardly wait to see my digs&#33;". They take flight once again, and as Pete leads on, the landscape below begins to appear more and more mundane until they finally land on a street lined with Brownstone houses. Pete indicates the third walkup on the left as the Popes new domicile and turns to leave, wishing the pontiff his best. The Pope, in a mild state of astonishment, cries out "Hey Pete&#33; What&#39;s the deal here? You put that lawyer-feller in a beautiful estate home and I, spiritual leader of terra-firma, end up with this dive?"
Pete looks at the pontiff amusedly and replys: "Look here old fellow, this street is practically encrusted with spiritual leaders from many times and religions. We&#39;re putting you here with them so you guys can get your dogma together. That other guy gets an estate, because he&#39;s the first (non-)damned lawyer to make it up here&#33;&#33;"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury aquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.
"Your honor," he said, "I wanna get out a warrent for that dirty lawyer of mine."
"Why ?" asked the judge. "He won your aquittal. What do you want to have him arrested for ?"
"Well, your honor," replied Carlson, "I didn&#39;t have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car I stole."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background," sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand.
"If I wasn&#39;t under oath, I&#39;d return the compliment," replied the witness.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A judge in a semi-small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendent, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under the influence, demanded a jury trial. It was nearly 4 p.m. and getting a jury would take time, so the judge called a recess and went out in the hall looking to impanel anyone available for jury duty. He found a dozen lawyers in the main lobby and told them that they were a jury.
The lawyers thought this would be a novel experience and so followed the judge back to the courtroom. The trial was over in about 10 minutes and it was very clear that the defendent was guilty. The jury went into the jury-room, the judge started getting ready to go home, and everyone waited.
After nearly three hours, the judge was totally out of patience and sent the bailiff into the jury-room to see what was holding up the verdict. When the bailiff returned, the judge said, "Well have they got a verdict yet?"
The bailiff shook his head and said, "Verdict? Hell, they&#39;re still doing nominating speeches for the foreman&#39;s position&#33;"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Diogenes went to look for an honest lawyer. "How&#39;s it going?", someone asked. "Not too bad", said Diogenes. "I still have my lantern."



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A woman and her little girl were visitng the grave of the little girl&#39;s grandmother. On their way through the cemetary back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"
"Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"
"The tombstone back there said &#39;Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.&#39;"



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:22 AM
* DEEP THOUGHTS * by Jack Handey

If they ever come up with a swashbuckling School, I think one of the courses
should be Laughing, Then Jumping Off Something.

When you&#39;re riding in a time machine way far into the future, don&#39;t stick your
elbow out the window, or it&#39;ll turn into a fossil.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be
"Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth X-rays. But then
I thought, if a patient said, "How&#39;s my back tooth?" and you just looked at it
with your X-ray vision and said, "Oh it&#39;s okay," then the patient would
probably say, "Aren&#39;t you going to take an X-ray, stupid?" and you&#39;d say, "Aw
fuck you, get outta here," and then he probably wouldn&#39;t even pay his bill.

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my
little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out
warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down."
He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty
good joke.
I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty
late.

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call
the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say.
"That&#39;s dynamite, baby."

Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I&#39;d ask for
a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you&#39;d probably
be able to get a lot of free games.

I&#39;d like to be buried Indian-style, where they put you up on a high rack,
above the ground. That way, you could get hit by meteorites and not even feel
it.

If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my
holster, I&#39;d carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said
something like "Hey, look. He&#39;s carrying a soldering iron&#33;" and started
laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, "That&#39;s
right, it&#39;s a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice." Then
everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the
soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink.

I bet when the neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end
up saying, "Don&#39;t forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get
embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and
they&#39;d get mad and eat the snowman.

Fear can sometimes be a useful emotion.
For instance, let&#39;s say you&#39;re an astronaught on the moon and you fear that
your partner has been turned into Dracula. The next time he goes out for the
moon pieces, wham&#33;, you just slam the door behind him and blast off. He might
call you on the radio and say he&#39;s not Dracula, but you just say, "Think
again, bat man."

Too bad you can&#39;t buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin
real fast and freak everybody out.

The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any
toys. But this one little boy had gotten anold enema bag and filled it with
rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with
it. Man, I think my heart almost broke.
Later the boy came up and offered to give me the toy. This was too much&#33; I
reached out my hand, but then he ran away. I chased him down and took the
enema bag. He cried a little, but that&#39;s the way of these people.

I wish I had a Kryptonite cross, because then you could keep both Dracula AND
Superman away.

I don&#39;t think I&#39;m alone when I say I&#39;d like to see more and more planets fall
under the ruthless domination of our solar system.

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why
several of us died of tuberculosis.

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself:
"Mankind". Basically, it&#39;s made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind".
What do these words mean ? It&#39;s a mystery, and that&#39;s why so is mankind.

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don&#39;t
just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and
we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, "I helped skin Bob."

I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they
don&#39;t want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when
somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?&#33;"

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and
bite, but it won&#39;t bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant
teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

I&#39;d rather be rich than stupid.

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadors came
up to you and asked where the gold was, I don&#39;t think it would be a good idea
to say, "I swallowed it. So sue me."

If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming
and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I&#39;m a
coward.

I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is
the story of Popeye.

When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they
ever press charges.

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there&#39;s no music, no choreography, and
the dancers hit each other.

What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a
solid gold baby? Maybe we&#39;ll never know.

We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can&#39;t scoff at them
personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.

Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking
surface attached to the end of a long stick.

I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free.
To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he&#39;s
throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

To me, clowns aren&#39;t funny. In fact, they&#39;re kind of scary. I&#39;ve wondered
where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus,
and a clown killed my dad.

As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very
pleasurable - until I realized it wasn&#39;t a nectarine at all, but A HUMAN
HEAD&#33;&#33;

Most people don&#39;t realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted
brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look
like a deer.

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?
We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out
when you&#39;re coming home his face might burn up.

You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people
happy, but inside he&#39;s real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself
down. I&#39;ll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person
comes to the door, I&#39;m gone, but you know what I&#39;ve left on the porch? A
jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it&#39;s head with a note that
says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

If you&#39;re a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right
back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.

If you ever teach a yodeling class, probably the hardest thing is to keep the
students from just trying to yodel right off. You see, we build to that.

If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you&#39;ll
look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

I&#39;d like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet
you can really see it in those genitals.

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someone&#39;s neck,
and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is
that thing?

He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. He loved it so much he made a
woman out of dirt and married her. But when he kissed her, she disintegrated.
Later, at the funeral, when the preacher said, "Dust to dust," some people
laughed, and the cowboy shot them. At his hanging, he told the others, "I&#39;ll
be waiting for you in heaven--with a gun."

The memories of my family outings are still a source of strength to me. I
remember we&#39;d all pile into the car - I forget what kind it was - and drive
and drive. I&#39;m not sure where we&#39;d go, but I think there were some trees
there. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever
sport we played. I remember a bigger, older guy we called "Dad." We&#39;d eat some
stuff, or not, and then I think we went home. I guess some things never leave
you.

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God
is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him
is "Probably because of something you did."

Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is
not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It&#39;s a shark riding on an
elephant&#39;s back, just trampling and eating everything they see.

As we were driving, we saw a sign that said "Watch for Rocks." Marta said it
should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks." I told her she should write in her
suggestion to the highway department, but she started saying it was a joke -
just to get out of writing a simple letter&#33; And I thought I was lazy&#33;

If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked
dolphins the most? I&#39;d say Flippy, wouldn&#39;t you? You&#39;d be wrong, though. It&#39;s
Hambone.

Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that&#39;s what her
dinner tasted like.

We used to laugh at Grandpa when he&#39;d head off and go fishing. But we wouldn&#39;t
be laughing that evening when he&#39;d come back with some whore he picked up in
town.

I wish a robot would get elected president. That way, when he came to town, we
could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.

As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I
thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how
I named him Flint.

If you&#39;re a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it&#39;s real
embarrassing if someone tries to kill you.

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct
is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then
it wouldn&#39;t seem quite so funny.

If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn&#39;t open, and you friends are
all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were
swimming.

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we&#39;d all
go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It
wasn&#39;t until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.

I wonder if Dracula ever has ticks.

When this girl at the art museum asked me whom I liked better, Monet or Manet,
I said, "I like mayonnaise." She just stared at me, so I said it again,
louder. Then she left. I guess she went to try to find some mayonnaise for me.

He was a spy, all right, and he knew it. He would walk into a room and people
would go, :Who the fuck is that guy, a spy?" He&#39;d laugh to himself, maybe pull
out his gun and show it to the person, to kind of impress him (but not to show
off).
Sometimes spying was dirty work. Sometimes he&#39;d kill a guy, then paint a
clown face on his face. Nobody said he had to do that, but he did it anyway.
So, dirty work.

I bet it&#39;s hard to break farmers of the old superstitions like "Tornado got
Old Yeller, stay in the cellar."

Blow ye winds,
Like the trumpet blows;
But without that noise.

I don&#39;t guess I&#39;ve ever been as scared as when I was waiting in the
principal&#39;s office. Finally he came in and sat down. He didn&#39;t say anything,
he just looked at me. Then he pulled a copy of Playboy out. "Is this yours?"
he said.
"No," I said, "is this yours?" And I pulled out my penis.
I guess I wasn&#39;t as scared as I thought.

If Alien was my friend, I&#39;d like to be with him when he went to the dentist.
When they started drilling, he&#39;d probably go nuts and start eating everybody.
That Alien&#33;

Why do there have to be rules for everything? It&#39;s gotten to the point that
rules dominate just about every aspect of our lives. In fact, it might be said
that rules have become the foot-long sticks of mankind.

I hate it when people say somebody has a "speech impediment", even if he does,
because it could hurt his feelings. So instead, I call it a "speech
improvement", and I go up to the guy and say, "Hey, Bob, I like your speech
improvement." I think this makes him feel better.

Many people think that history is a dull subject. Dull? Is it "dull" that
Jesse James once got bitten on the forehead by an ant, and at first it didn&#39;t
seem like anything, but then the bite got worse and worse, so he went to a
doctor in town, and the secretary told him to wait, so he sat down and waited,
and waited, and waited, and waited, and then finally he got to see the doctor,
and the doctor put some salve on it? You call that dull?

Some folks say it was a miracle. St. Francis suddenly appeared and knocked the
next pitch clean over the fence. Other folks say it was just a lucky swing.

I think one reason I could be a good playboy is I would be willing to spend
the time required to really fix up my "pad".

To me, it&#39;s always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you
walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?," you
can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."

It makes me mad when I go to all the trouble of having Marta cook up about a
hundred drumsticks, then the guy at Marineland says, "You can&#39;t throw that
chicken to the dolphins. They eat fish."
Sure they eat fish, if that&#39;s all you give them&#33; Man, wise up.

I think it&#39;s high time we started questioning the old cliches like "Grunt big
for Daddy."

Anybody who has an identity problem had better wise up and get with the
program&#33;

I think a good way to get into a movie is to show up where they&#39;re making the
movie, then stick a big cactus plant onto your buttocks and start yowling and
running around. Everyone would think it was funny, and the head movie guy
would say, :Hey, let&#39;s put him in the movie."

Tonight, when we were eating dinner, Marta said something that really knocked
me for a loop. She said, "I love carrots."
"Good," I said as I gritted my teeth real hard. "Then maybe you and carrots
would like to go into the bedroom and have sex&#33;"
They didn&#39;t, but maybe they will sometime, and I can watch.

I can still recall old Mr. Barnslow getting out every morning and nailing a
fresh load of tadpoles to that old board of his. Then he&#39;d spin it round and
round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he&#39;d yell out,
"Tadpoles&#33; Tadpoles is a winner&#33;"
We all thought he was crazy. But then, we had some growing up to do.

I think they should continue the policy of not giving a Nobel Prize for
paneling.

Here&#39;s a good joke to do during an earthquake: Straddle a big crack in the
earth, and if it opens wider, go, "Whoa&#33; Whoa&#33;" and flail your arms around, as
if you&#39;re going to fall in.

One question that&#39;s never been answered to my satisfaction by the "Playboy
Advisor" is "What kind of stereo system works best in hell?"

A funny thing to do is, if you&#39;re out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a
poisonous snake, tell him you&#39;re going to go for help, then go about ten feet
and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him
about who&#39;s going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That&#39;s why
it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.

Folks still remember the day ole Bob Riley came bouncing down that dirt road
in his pickup. Pretty soon, it was bouncing higher and higher. The tires
popped, and the shocks broke, but that truck kept bouncing. Some say it
bounced clean over the moon, but whoever says that is a goddamn liar.

Just as irrigation is the lifeblood of the Southwest, lifeblood is the soup of
cannibals.

In some places it&#39;s known as a tornado. In others, a cyclone. And in still
others, the Idiot&#39;s Merry-go-round. But around here they&#39;ll always be known as
screw-boys.

I wish I lived back in the old west days, because I&#39;d save up my money for
about twenty years so I could buy a solid-gold pick. Then I&#39;d go out West and
start digging for gold. When someone came up and asked what I was doing, I&#39;d
say, "Looking for gold, ya durn fool." He&#39;d say, "Your pick is gold," and I&#39;d
say, "Well, that was easy."
Good joke, huh.

I think somebody should come up with a way to breed a very large shrimp. That
way, you could ride him, then, after you camped at night, you could eat him.
How about it, science?

I think a good product would be "Baby Duck Hat". It&#39;s a fake baby duck, which
you strap on top of your head. Then you go swimming underwater until you find
a mommy duck and her babies, and you join them. Then, all of a sudden, you
stand up out of the water and roar like Godzilla. Man, those ducks really take
off&#33;
Also, Baby Duck Hat is good for parties.

Laugh, clown, laugh. This is what I tell myself whenever I dress up like Bozo.

Any man, in the right situation, is capable of murder. But not any man is
capable of being a good camper. So, murder and camping are not as similar as
you might think.

The prince decided he would learn anger. So he gathered his subjects together
outside his balcony. :Who would teach me anger?" he said.
"Fuck you&#33;" somebody yelled.
"Okay, how about algebra?" said the prince.

If you go to a party, and you want to be the popular one at the party, do
this: Wait until no one is looking, then kick a burning log out of the
fireplace onto the carpet. Then jump on top of it with your body and yell,
"Log o&#39; fire&#33; Log o&#39; fire&#33;"
I&#39;ve never done this, but I think it&#39;d work.

As the snow started to fall, he tugged his coat tighter around himself. Too
tight, as it turned out.
"This is the fourth coat crushing this year", said the sergeant as he
outlined the body with a special pencil that writes on snow.

I read that when the archaeologists dug down into the ancient cemetary, they
found fragments of *human bones*&#33; What kind of barbarians were these people,
anyway?

I&#39;ll be the first to admit that my idea of God is pretty different. I believe
in a God with a long white beard, a gold crown, and a long robe with lots of
shiny jewels on it. He sits on a big throne in the clouds, and He&#39;s about five
hundred feet tall. He talks in a real deep voice like "I...AM...GOD&#33;" He can
blow up stuff just by looking at it.
This is my own, personal idea of God.

Marta says the interesting thing about fly-fishing is that it&#39;s two lives
connected by a thin strand.
Come on, Marta. Grow up.

Here&#39;s a good trick: Get a job as a judge at the Olympics. Then, if some guy
sets a world record, pretend that you didn&#39;t see it and go, "Okay, is
everybody ready to start now?"

Too bad when I was a kid there wasn&#39;t a guy in our class that everybody called
the "Cricket Boy", because I would have liked to stand up in class and tell
everybody, "You can make fun of the Cricket Boy if you want to, but to me he&#39;s
just like everybody else." Then everybody would leave the Cricket Boy alone,
and I&#39;d invite him over to spend the night at my house, but after about five
minutes of that loud chirping I&#39;d have to kick him out.
Maybe later we could get up a petition to get the Cricket Family run out of
town. Bye, Cricket Boy.

The whole town laughed at my great-grandfather, just because he worked hard
and saved his money. True, working at the hardware store didn&#39;t pay much, but
he felt it was better than what everybody else did, which was go up to the
volcano and collect the gold nuggets it shot out every day.
It turned out he was right. After forty years, the volcano petered out.
Everybody left town, and the hardware store went broke. Finally he decided to
collect gold nuggets too, but there weren&#39;t many left by then. Plus, he broke
his leg and the doctor&#39;s bills were real high.

If I had a nickname, I think I would want it to be "Prince of Weasels",
because then I could go up and bite people and they would turn around and go,
"What the-?" And then they would recognize me, and go, "Oh, it&#39;s you, the
Prince of Weasels."

As the sleek new sports car wound its way up the tortuous road, Henri tought
back to the torture he had received ten minutes ago. "Ah, air conditioning",
he thought as he aimed the vents toward the numerous whip marks on his legs,
chest, and groinal area.

I hope, when they die, cartoon characters have to answer for their sins.

Marta was watching the football game with me when she said, "You know, most of
these sports are based on the idea of one group protecting its territory from
invasion by another group."
"Yeah," I said, trying not to laugh.
Girls are funny.

Whether they ever find life there or not, I think Jupiter should be considered
an enemy planet.

When the chairman introduced the guest speaker as a former illegal alien, I
got up from my chair and yelled, "What&#39;s the matter, no jobs on Mars?" When no
one laughed, I was real embarrassed. I don&#39;t think people should make you feel
that way.

It&#39;s amazing to me that one of the world&#39;s most feared diseases would be
carried by one of the world&#39;s smallest animals: the real tiny dog.

One thing that makes me believe in UFOs is, sometimes I lose stuff.

I guess more bad things have been done in the name of progress than any other.
I myself have been guilty of this. When I was a teen-ager, I stole a car and
drove it out into the desert and set it on fire. When the police showed up, I
just shrugged and said, "Hey, progress."
Boy, did I have a lot to learn.

Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night, with no
other cars around, I start imagining: What if there were no civilization out
there? No cities, no factories, no people? And then I think: No people or
factories? Then who made this car? And this highway? And I get so confused I
have to stick my head out the window into the driving rain - unless there&#39;s
lightning, because I could get struck on the head by a bolt.

The difference between a man and a boy is, a boy wants to grow up to be a
fireman, but a man wants to grow up to be a giant monster fireman.

I think the monkeys at the zoo should have to wear sunglasses so they can&#39;t
hypnotize you.

Sometimes life seems like a dream, especially when I look down and see that I
forgot to put on my pants.

Love can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you&#39;ve never
known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and
bitter.
Wait. It&#39;s not love I&#39;m describing. I&#39;m thinking of a monorail.

I wouldn&#39;t be surprised if someday some fisherman caught a big shark and cut
it open, and there inside was a whole person. Then they cut the person open,
and in him is a little baby shark. And in the baby shark there isn&#39;t a person,
because it would be too small. But there&#39;s a little doll or something, like a
Johnny Combat little toy guy - something like that.

I bet it was pretty hard to pick up girls if you had the Black Death.

Sometimes I wish Marta were more loyal to me. Like the other day. The car
parked next to ours had a real dirty windshield; so I wrote THIS CAR LOOKS
LIKE A FART in the dirt. Later I asked Marta if she thought it was a childish
thing to do. She said, "Well, maybe," Man, whose side is she on, anyway?

Sometimes I wonder if I&#39;m sexy enough. When I walk into a singles bar with my
"fashionable" shirt, "fashionable" slacks, and a big new rubber manta-ray
helmet. I can&#39;t help wondering: Do women want to talk to me for myself, or do
they just want to get a feel of that nice rubber manta skin?

It&#39;s too bad that whole families have to be torn apart by something as simple
as wild dogs.

The land that had nourished him and had borne him fruit now turned against him
and called him a fruit.
Man, I hate land like that.

Life, to me, is like a quiet forest pool, one that needs a direct hit from a
big rock half-buried in the ground. You pull and you pull, but you can&#39;t get
the rock out of the ground. So you give it a good kick, but you lose your
balance and go skidding down the hill toward the pool. Then out comes a big
Hawaiian man who was screwing his wife beside the pool because they thought it
was real pretty. He tells you to get out of there, but you start faking it,
like you&#39;re talking Hawaiian, and then he gets mad and chases you . . .

It&#39;s fascinating to think that all around us there&#39;s an invisible world we
can&#39;t even see. I&#39;m speaking, of course, of the World of the Invisible Scary
Skeletons.

Whenever I hear the sparrow chirping, watch the woodpecker chirp, catch a
chirping trout, or listen to the sad howl of the chirp rat, I think: Oh boy&#33;
I&#39;m going insane again.

If they have moving sidewalks in the future, when you get on them, I think you
should have to assume sort of a walking shape so as not to frighten the dogs.

He was the kind of man who was not ashamed to show affection. I guess that&#39;s
what I hated about him.

I think college administrators should encourage students to urinate on walls
and bushes, because then when students from another college come sniffing
around, they&#39;ll know this is someone else&#39;s territory.

The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I&#39;ll put a very large
blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat. And if someone
asks me why I didn&#39;t get more meat, I&#39;ll just say, "Oh, you mean this?" and
pull out a big piece of meat from inside the blob of potatoes, where I&#39;ve
hidden it.
Good magic trick, huh?

I think my new thing will be to try to be a real happy guy. I&#39;ll just walk
around being real happy until some jerk says something stupid to me.

If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind people and pinching them is
probably a joke that gets old real fast.

If you want to be the most popular person in your class, whenever the
professor pauses in his lecture, just let out a big snort and say "How do you
figger that&#33;" real loud. Then lean back and sort of smirk.

Too bad Lassie didn&#39;t know how to ice skate, because then if she was in
Holland on vacation in winter and someone said "Lassie, go skate for help,"
she could do it.

When you&#39;re going up the stairs and you take a step, kick the other leg up
high behind you to keep people from following too close.

If you&#39;re ever shipwrecked on a tropical island and you don&#39;t know how to
speak the natives&#39; language, just say "Poppy-oomy." I bet it means something.

I wish scientists would come up with an ear of corn that was big and round,
because then when you were eating it, it&#39;d be fun to make chew marks in the
shape of continents.

I wonder if angels believe in ghosts.

I have to laugh when I think of the first cigar, because it was probably just
a bunch of rolled-up tobacco leaves.

I don&#39;t understand people who say life is a mystery, because what is it they
want to know?

Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and
catching some rays? Maybe you&#39;ll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway;
that&#39;s my point.



Happy Fun Ball
-only &#036;14.95-

Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly and children under 10 should avoid
prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.

Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Happy Fun Ball Contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture,
should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.

Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs:
*Itching
*Vertigo
*Dizziness
*Tingling in extremities
*Loss of balance or coordination
*Slurred speech
*Temporary Blindness
*Profuse sweating
*Heart Palpitations

If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and
cover head.

Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container
and kept under refrigeration...

Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Wacky Products
Incorporated, and its parent company Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all
liability.

ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which fell
to Earth, presumably from outer space.

Happy Fun Ball has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also
being dropped by our warplanes on Irag.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee.

Happy Fun Ball
ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES&#33;






:lol: :lol: real long deep thoughts :lol: :lol:

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 04:23 AM
:helpsmile:

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:27 AM
50 WAYS TO CONFUSE, WORRY, OR JUST SCARE THE MESS OUT OF PEOPLE IN THE COMPUTER LAB
1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God&#33; They&#39;ve found me&#33;" and bolt.

2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.

3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can&#39;t get the damn thing to work. After he/she&#39;s turned it on, wait 5 minutes,turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.

4. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.

5. Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to different screen than the one it&#39;s set up with.

6. Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again.

7. Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.

8. Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files.

9. Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don&#39;t know.

10. Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on.

11. Bring a chainsaw, but don&#39;t use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.

12. Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at everything bad about your life. Then stop and continue typing.

13. Enter the lab, undress, and start staring at other people as if they&#39;re crazy while typing.

14. Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting.

15. Ask around for a spare disk. Offer &#036;2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot."

16. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES&#33;" when it finishes.

17. "DISK FIGHT&#33;&#33;&#33;"

18. Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new friends).

19. Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw.

20. If you&#39;re sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.

21. Draw a pictue of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain loudly that women (men) are worthless.

22. Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn&#39;t work, get the supervisor.

23. When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is when you turn on one of those.

24. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.

25. Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisely. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you.

26. Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next to grinding. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger.

27. If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut them and deposit them on your neighbor&#39;s keyboard as you leave.

28. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.

29. Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic.

30. Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions.

31. Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames&#33;&#33;&#33;" and continue working.

32. Bring som dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.

33. Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, the B key is F sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note loudly. Write an entire paper this way.

34. Attempt to eat your computer&#39;s mouse.

35. Borrow someone else&#39;s keyboard by reaching over, saying "Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the keyboard & taking it.

36. Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.

37. When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes the old ways are best.

38. Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.

39. Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so your file isn&#39;t affected). Then look at your neighbor&#39;s keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you&#39;ve deleted about a page of your neighbor&#39;s document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I&#39;ve been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn&#39;t deleting&#33; Ha&#33;" Print out your document and leave.

40. Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put some Elmer&#39;s Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is drooling.)

41. Stare at the person&#39;s next to your&#39;s screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing, grab your stuffand leave, howling as you go.

42. Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR&#33;" peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start to type again.

43. Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.

44. See who&#39;s online. Send a total stranger a talk request. Talk to them like you&#39;ve known them all your lives. Hangup before they geta chance to figure out you&#39;re a total stranger.

45. Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound effects. Pretend it&#39;s the computer and look really lost.

46. Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain that the lead doesn&#39;t work.

47. Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh happily, exclaim "You&#39;re such a marvel&#33;&#33;", and kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your neighbor, then the computer assistant, and walk out.

48. Run into the computer lab, shout "Armageddon is here&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;", then calmly sit down and begin to type.

49. Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker chainsaw, rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and say, "Give me that computer or you&#39;ll be feeding my pet crocodile for the next week".

50. Two words: Tesla Coil

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:29 AM
THE RULES

THE RULES The FEMALE always makes The Rules
The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification
No MALE can possibly know all The Rules
If the FEMALE suspects the MALE knows all The Rules, she mustimmediately
change some or all of The Rules
The FEMALE is never wrong
If the FEMALE is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a direct
result of something the MALE said or did wrong
The MALE must immediately apologize for said misunderstanding
The FEMALE may change her mind at any time
The MALE must never change his mind without the express written consent of
the FEMALE
The FEMALE has every right to be angry or upset at any time for any reason
The MALE must remain calm at all times, unless the FEMALE wants himto be angry
and/or upset
The MALE is expected to read the FEMALE&#39;S mind at all times
The MALE who doesn&#39;t abide by The Rules Can&#39;t take the heat lacks a spine
and is a wimp
Any attempt to document The Rules could result in bodily harm
If the FEMALE has PMS, all The Rules are null and void
The FEMALE is ready when she is ready
The MALE must be ready at all times

bujub22
05-02-2004, 04:32 AM
Samples from actual letters received by the Welfare Department in applications for support.

1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and six children. I had seven but one died which was baptized on a half sheet of paper.

2. I am writing the Welfare Department to say that my baby was born two years old. When do I get my money?

3. Mrs. Jackson has not had any clothes for a year and has been visited regularly by the clergy.

4. I can not get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell my why?

5. I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.

6. This is my eight child. What are you going to do about it?

7. Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am now living with can&#39;t eat or do anything until he knows.

8. I am very much annoyed to find you have branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie, as I was married a week before he was born.

9. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my three children, one of which is a mistake, as you can see.

10. In answer to your letter, I have given birth to a boy weighing 10 lbs. I hope this is satisfactory.

11. My husband got his project cut off two weeks ago and I haven&#39;t had any relief since.

12. Unless I get my husband&#39;s money pretty soon, I will be forced to lead an immortal life.

13. You have changed my boy to a girl. Will this make any difference?

14. I have no children as yet as my husband is a truck driver and works day and night.

15. In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.

16. I want money as quick as I can get it. I have been in bed with the doctor for two weeks and he doesn&#39;t do me any good. If things don&#39;t improve, I will have to send for another doctor.

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 04:38 AM
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/5000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> ('http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/5000.jpg')
am i good or what B)

4th gen
05-02-2004, 04:39 AM
Originally posted by ziggyjuarez@2 May 2004 - 03:38
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/5000.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'> (http://img50.photobucket.com/albums/v153/ziggyjuarez/5000.jpg)
am i good or what B)
Get a macro program, set it to run for 12 hours, clicking the button every second, and then sleep

ziggyjuarez
05-02-2004, 04:43 AM
Im not a cheater B)

gungrave
05-02-2004, 05:18 AM
lets see how many pages we can get this.
iv posted about 20 times in here :rolleyes:
done 40 posts in 1 nite :ph34r:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 12:14 PM
hi everyone glad you all kept the fun going :lol:


heres another great fun ggaming site for y&#39;all


HERE (http://www.miniclip.com)

DanB
05-02-2004, 12:27 PM
:01: FUN :01:














:music1:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 12:45 PM
breaking fun news&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;


Rikk and Cowsy&#39;s has 10 members logged in to the forum.


good for them&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; :lol:

Aaron_T
05-02-2004, 03:19 PM
click here (http://www.comedycentral.com)


on this site has loads of games and you can also create your very own south park character :lol:

100%
05-02-2004, 03:28 PM
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/neo3.gif

Aaron_T
05-03-2004, 02:42 PM
Originally posted by Zedaxax@2 May 2004 - 14:28
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/neo3.gif
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Aaron_T
05-05-2004, 02:48 PM
CLICK HERE FOR THE NEWEST FUN SITE EVER BB&#39;S CHATROOM IS HERE&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; (http://s7.invisionfree.com/Azzzs_Place/index.php?act=idx)

bujub22
05-05-2004, 02:52 PM
Originally posted by Azzz@5 May 2004 - 10:56
CLICK HERE FOR THE NEWEST FUN SITE EVER BB&#39;S CHATROOM IS HERE&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; (http://s7.invisionfree.com/Azzzs_Place/index.php?act=idx)
azz u know u might get in trouble for that it&#39;s kinda like advertising it?

Aaron_T
05-05-2004, 02:55 PM
Originally posted by bujub22+5 May 2004 - 14:00--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (bujub22 @ 5 May 2004 - 14:00)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Azzz@5 May 2004 - 10:56
CLICK HERE FOR THE NEWEST FUN SITE EVER BB&#39;S CHATROOM IS HERE&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; (http://s7.invisionfree.com/Azzzs_Place/index.php?act=idx)
azz u know u might get in trouble for that it&#39;s kinda like advertising it? [/b][/quote]
ssshh no-one noticed ;)

Manny Roscoe
05-05-2004, 02:56 PM
Originally posted by bujub22+5 May 2004 - 11:00--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (bujub22 @ 5 May 2004 - 11:00)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Azzz@5 May 2004 - 10:56
CLICK HERE FOR THE NEWEST FUN SITE EVER BB&#39;S CHATROOM IS HERE&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; (http://s7.invisionfree.com/Azzzs_Place/index.php?act=idx)
azz u know u might get in trouble for that it&#39;s kinda like advertising it? [/b][/quote]
He&#39;ll end up like Haxor....

Aaron_T
05-05-2004, 02:57 PM
the only wat that will happen is if it gets reported so ssshh :lol: