stella awards

stella awards

Once again, it's time to review the winners of the Annual Stella

Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who

spilled coffee on herself & successfully sued McDonalds. That case

inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in

the United States.

__________

6th place

19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles, California, won $74,000 &

medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda

Accord. Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the

wheel of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.

5th place

Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had

just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the

garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.

He could not reenter the house because the door connecting the house &

garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family were on vacation & Mr.

Dickson found himself locked in the garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a

case of Pepsi he found & a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the

house owners insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental

anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4th place

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 & medical

expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's

Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The

award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been

a little provoked at the time, as Mr. Williams who had climbed over the

fence into the yard, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

3rd place

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,

Pennsylvania, $113,500, after she slipped on a soft drink & broke her

coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had

thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument

I hope Jessica doesn't read this!

2nd place

Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, sued the owner of a night club in a

neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor &

knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was

trying to crawl through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying

the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 & dental expenses.

1st place

This year's winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.

Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor Home. On his trip

home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, he set

the cruise control at 70 mph & calmly left the drivers seat to go into

the back & make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the Motor

Home left the freeway, crashed & then overturned.

Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him,by reading the

owner's manual, that he actually could not do this. The jury awarded him

$1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company actually

changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in case there were

any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.