My mother sent me this old family recipe...
Christmas Cookie Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
1 tsp lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Crown Royal Reserve
Take a large bowl, check the Crown to be sure it is of the highest
quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy
Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again. At this point it's best to make
sure the Crown is still OK, try another cup . just in case.
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and
chuck in the cup of dried fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor...
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it
loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Crown to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet. Check
the Crown Royal. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to
off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the
bottle of Crown Royal and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.