Woman: Is there a problem, officer ?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. May I see your driver's 'license, please ?
Woman: I'd give it to you, but I don't have one.
Officer: You have no driver's license ?
Woman: Lost it four times for drunk driving.
Officer: Oh. May I see your vehicle registration, please ?
Woman: Sorry... I can't do that.
Officer: Why not ?
Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: You stole this car ?
Woman: Yes. And I killed the owner and hacked up his body.
Officer: You what ?
Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see for yourself. The policeman stares at the woman, then slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five police cars screech to a halt encircling the stopped car. A senior officer warily approaches the woman, clasping his half-drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, would you please step out of your vehicle.
Woman: Is there a problem, sir ?
Officer 2: The other officer reported that you stole this car and murdered the owner.
Woman: Murdered the owner ?
Officer 2: Yes, would you please open the trunk of your car ? The woman opens the trunk. It is empty.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is stunned.
Officer 2: The other officer claims that you do not have a driver's license.
The woman digs into her handbag, pulls out a wallet, removes a driverís license and gives it to the officer. The officer examines it closely, looking puzzled.
Officer 2: I must admit, ma'am, that I'm confused. The other officer told me you didnít have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered the owner.
Woman: I suppose the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too !