Yesterday a giant package was delivered to my work, full of Lakeland (sweet Lakeland ) goodies. So, I decide not to run home but to catch the bus.
Bus turns up, and the driver doesn't have change for a fiver. A ticket costs 2 fucking quid, and he doesn't have 3 change! Like hell. Anyway, he sort of smirks and laughs as he says it, so I think 'right, I'll show you ' and I say a breezy 'thank you anyway!' and get off the bus to walk. Start to wish I wasn't wearing heels on a half hour walk carrying a stupid box.
It's ok, I have my MP3. Then the battery dies. Woe is me! I start to feel really miserable, but then I remember something from years back. I used to live with a bunch of guys who knew this complete tosser. He was the sort of bloke who has 2 football teams (Birmingham and Man U), with one as a back-up in case the other fails. He was a total emo before it really had a name. One day he'd gone for a walk in the park to cheer himself up. He'd been feeling particularly depressed and it was a lovely sunny day outside. As he's walking along he sees a tramp approach, then the tramp drops his trousers, squats in front of him and takes a giant shit.
As I was walking along I started to picture in my head his face doing a proper 'Mwow mwow mwow' sad expression, and I ended up laughing so hard I almost dropped my box.
Anyone else do something/think something in particular when you're pissed off to cheer yourself up?