Subject: : how to give bad news
> > An exact replica of a supposedly actual letter a daughter wrote
> > to her parents from college.
> > Dear Mom and Dad:
> > It has now been three months since I left for college.
> > I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my
> > thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to
> > now, but, before you read on, please sit down. YOU ARE NOT TO
> > READ ANY FURTHER UNLESS YOU ARE SITTING DOWN. OKAY!
> > Well then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture and
> > the concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dormitory
> > it caught fire shortly after my arrival are
> > pretty well healed now. I only get those sick headaches once a day.
> > Fortunately the fire in the dormitory and my jump were witnessed by an
> > attendant at the gas station near the dorm, and he was the one who
> > the fire department and the ambulance. He also visited me at the
> > and, since I had nowher to live because of the burned out dormitory, he
> > was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him. It's
> > a basement room, but it's kind of cute. He is a very fine boy and we
> > fallen deeply in
> > love and are planning to be married. We haven't set the exact date
> > yet,but it will be before my pregnancy begins to show. Yes, Mother and
> > Dad, I am pregnant. I know ho much you are looking forward to being
> > grandparents and I know you will welcome the baby and give it the love,
> > devotion and tender care you gave me when I was a child. About my
> > I know you will welcome him into our family with open arms. He is kind
> > and, although not well educated, he is ambitious. Although he is of a
> > different race and religion than ours, I know your often expressed
> > tolerance will not permit you to be bothered
> > by the fact that his skin color is somewhat different than ours. I am
> > sure you will love him as I do. His family background is good too, for
> > am told that his father is an important gun-bearer in the village from
> > which he came. Now that I have brought you up to date, I want to tell
> > that there was no dormitory fire I did not have a concussion or a skull
> > fracture. I was not in the hospital, I am not pregnant, I am no
> > there is no man in my life. However,I am getting a 'D' in History and an
> > 'F' in Science and I wanted you to see those marks in the proper
> > perspective.
> > Anyways this news is better than those above
> > Your Loving Daughter.
> > Regards
> > Vidya Bhargav