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Out of order
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10-25-2003, 02:21 PM
Lounge -
#2
Poster
Good story uNz[i]! It certainly kept my attention, which is the main thing.
Good luck
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10-27-2003, 07:49 PM
Lounge -
#3
Poster
It was a good story, but I personally think it should have been written narration style rather then the I's and We's. If it was Him and Them it would give you alot more room to add little technicalities that would bring the story more life.
Giving the ability to describe the characters and so on.
But I dont know much about books, I just read em not review them, but thats my personal view.
All in all it was cool, Nice one.
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10-28-2003, 03:26 AM
Lounge -
#4
Out of order
Originally posted by noname12@28 October 2003 - 05:19
It was a good story, but I personally think it should have been written narration style rather then the I's and We's. If it was Him and Them it would give you alot more room to add little technicalities that would bring the story more life.
Giving the ability to describe the characters and so on.
Agreed. I felt exactly the same way after re-reading the story after posting... because of the deadline, the writing was rushed, and it shows in the characters and narration. A rewrite would fix it.. if I wasn't so damned lazy.
Thanks for the positive feedback, both of you.
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