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Thread: Dark Humor Thread

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Crazy ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolate- they'll kill your dog.

    ----------------------------------------------------------------

    Why doesn't Ebola medicine work in Africa?

    It can't be taken on an empty stomach.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    On a flight to Japan, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane.
    "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! I've had plenty of relationships in my life, but no one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well I've had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?" For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril and they all stare riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a business man stands up in the rear of the plane.
    "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Well-dressed, tall, built, with flowing black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time. No one moves. The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the strange man approaches. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Iron this."
    Last edited by megabyteme; 11-02-2014 at 02:02 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    What's the hardest part about breaking up with a Japanese girlfriend?

    You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it.

    --------------------------------

    http://i.imgur.com/pUGo5oZ.gifv
    Last edited by megabyteme; 11-07-2014 at 09:09 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    dion09529's Avatar Helter Skelter BT Rep: +1
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    Quote Originally Posted by megabyteme View Post

    On a flight to Japan, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane.
    "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! I've had plenty of relationships in my life, but no one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well I've had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?" For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril and they all stare riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a business man stands up in the rear of the plane.
    "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Well-dressed, tall, built, with flowing black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time. No one moves. The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the strange man approaches. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Iron this."
    Old shit was here. Now it's gone.

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    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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    dion09529's Avatar Helter Skelter BT Rep: +1
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    Old shit was here. Now it's gone.

  10. Lounge   -   #10
    megabyteme's Avatar RASPBERRY RIPPLE BT Rep: +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19BT Rep +19
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    Quote Originally Posted by IdolEyes787 View Post
    Ghey lumberjacks, wolverines, blackflies in the summer, polar bears in the winter, that's basically Canada in a nutshell.

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