Happy Birthday, mbm!

[mjmacky]

Not even ironic.
Pity I missed it first time around, chapeau.

Think of me like a street magician. First, I get you with the sleight of hand. Then, I return with a wiffle bat painted as an aluminum bat and proceed to bludgeon you with it.

Mild amusement that becomes increasingly annoying as you remain in my presence is the common factor.

This is possibly the first time I've ever written wiffle bat, so I leaned on luck and experience to spell it correctly. It probably should be capitalized, but appearing German puts too much of an edge on it.

[chalice]

If it makes you feel any better, know that that nefarious nasal wart which siphoned my spirit for twelve, count 'em, kids, sadistic solar cycles of humiliation and paranoia, having been frosted into submission by liquid nitrogen, providing huge temporary humanity to one who had abandoned the notion altogether, has resurfaced anew, proud and resplendent, now taking residency upon my eyebrow. Right, if you must know.

That was a long sentence.

After enduring a cunt-numbing 12 years last time out, surely you've already made arrangements for the sand-blasting to occur forthwith.
I would implore you, however, to wait beyond the 31st. The one time of year your hereditas damnosa can rightly shine as the piece de resistance.

No provision as yet. I'm kinda resigned to it. I cheated karma with medical science, innit. These things never work out well.

I don't mind it too much. If I did, I could simply take a Sharpie to it, rendering it invisible to cameras and most naked eyeballs. The problem with its kin was it was often sorely mistaken for petrified mucus, such was its position arim my nostril. All kinds of hilarity ensued to the determent.

This is a manageable reminder. A threat from the biological depths. Almost distinguished.

[mjmacky]

No provision as yet. I'm kinda resigned to it.

Dig the fuck out of it with sharp instruments until you find that small cluster of black roots, and then burn your face with acid or liquid nitrogen.

It's weird when those two share the verb. I may have just broken a law for your sake.

[chalice]

No provision as yet. I'm kinda resigned to it.

Dig the fuck out of it with sharp instruments until you find that small cluster of black roots, and then burn your face with acid or liquid nitrogen.

It's weird when those two share the verb. I may have just broken a law for your sake.

Yes, I've become pretty adept with warts. Your advice does work, but it's inadvisable to do it yourself.

I have taken to myself with nail clippers, lighters, wall-butts, spatulas, knives and pliers. Now something of an authority, I can report emphatically that these measures are fruitless.

Only a person donning blue latex gloves and an eye shield can truly achieve eradication.

You should have that on your familial coat of arms.

[IdolEyes787]

... are you a racist Canadian?

Yes to both unless you purposely left out the comma, you witty bastard.

[IdolEyes787]

That was be changing the subject because I intend to eat sometime in the future.

[chalice]

That was be changing the subject because I intend to eat sometime in the future.

Do you have a cold? It all comes back to mucus.

[IdolEyes787]

Those who reside just to the east of the Atlantic passionately defend the spelling and pronunciation of me.

In short,be was the subtext used to convey the silliness of it all given the previous squabbles.

[chalice]

That would have been perfect if you'd just spaced your comma.

[IdolEyes787]

That was merely another witticism, pheasant.