Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies.
He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
The Devil: "I don't know what to do here, you're on my list, but I have no room for you. But you definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do: I've got a couple of people here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."
Bin Laden thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil led him into the first room.
In it was Saddam Hussein and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed. Over and over and over. That was his fate in hell.
Bin Laden: "No, I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long."
So the devil led him to the next room. In it was Manuel Noriega with a sledgehammer and a huge pile of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time.
Bin Laden:"No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I'd be in constant agony if all I did was break rocks all day."
So the devil opened a third door. In it, Bin Laden saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms over his head and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was his girl Monica Lewinski, doing what she does best.
Osama Bin Laden stared in disbelief and finally said: "Yeah, I can handle this."
The devil smiled wickedly and said:
"OK, Monica, you're free to go."