Originally posted by SexualFartening@24 February 2004 - 10:59
Crazy Glue does the Job for You!!
KRAZY GLUE TRICKS:
- Krazy Glue someone's doors and windows shut.
- Krazy Glue someone's school locker shut...only while ALL his books are in
it.
- Krazy Glue someone's gym or pool locker shut...only while his clothes are
in it.
- Krazy Glue that dick of a teacher or prof into his office or classroom.
This is better done to a second floor or higher room.
- Krazy Glue the clappers on all the fire bells in your school fixed. (thanx
to a PIPELINE user for this one)
- Krazy Glue the mike switch and power switch of your school's PA system on.
Then you can hear what REALLY goes on in there...All day!
- If you can get into his car, Krazy Glue your favorite dick's steering
wheel so it can't turn.
- Put a few drops of Krazy Glue in the keyhole of a door or the key ignition
of a car, so the key either won't go in or won't turn if it does go in.
- If your school's AudioVisual equipment is connected to cable, and if your
cable system has it, Krazy Glue the Channel dial stuck... on the Porno
Channel!
- Krazy Glue that Barbell to the squat rack or press bench - Only Hercules
will be able to lift that 20-pound Wimp-bell!
- Krazy Glue the hands on all the clocks at school to 3PM or whenever school
lets out.
- Krazy Glue your favorite dick's walkman battery door SHUT. He won't know
what happened 'til his batteries run down.
- Envious of your buddy's expensive looking mechanical pencil? Well, don't
steal it cuz he'll know it's you. Instead, Krazy Glue the clicker button
at the top so it won't move when pushed. It will then run out of lead VERY
QUICKLY and can never be used again.
- Wanna REALLY fuck someone over? Krazy Glue his bike's brakes OPEN so when
he wants to stop, he can't. This trick can get a guy killed, so only use
it as MORTAL revenge.
- In winter, Krazy Glue someone's window open.
- Krazy Glue the bell clapper on a phone so it can't hit the bell when it
rings. They will wonder why no one is calling them and their friends will
wonder why no one answers.
- Let a drop or two of Krazy Glue slide down the crack between the little
post on the phone that goes down when you hang up (Not to your own fone).
The Krazy Glue will solidify causing the phone to be stuck "off the hook".
I bet if I thought hard enuf, I could come up with a fuckin' MILLION of'em!
Anyways, here's some more pranks, revenge techniques and general mayhem.
- Throw a couple of nice pretty colored smoke bombs into someones house
during a prep party.
- Perform a satanic ritual on the boulevard or sidewalk (public property) in
front of the house of the most obnoxious fundamentalist christian you know.
- Play Iron Maiden songs at full crank as you drive by a church on Sunday
Morning.
- Same drill, only at a christian "record burning" revival.
- Your worst enemy has finally died, and you are not accused of his demise.
Moon his funeral procession.
- Shit on his gravestone.
- Paint his gravestone Flourescent pink.
- That god-damn baptist preacher has gone and convinced town council to ban
dancing and rock'n'roll. Paint his church flourescent pink. Or use some of
the above Krazy Glue tricks.
- Or burn him in effigy. Where he can see.
- If you work in a fast-food restaurant, piss in the fry vat.
- If you read the July '81 National Lampoon, you have heard this one: Steal
a heavy earth-mover, like a bulldozer or backhoe. Right around 4 AM, when
the sprinklers have been going all night, drive all around a golf course
in one of these. The ground is so soft from the sprinklers being on all
night that you will really fuck it up good, especially the greens. And
they cost a LOT of money to fix.
- I read in Easyriders magazine this month about a prisoner who sent all the
guards at his pen to hospital by taking a "big healthy shit" in the
spaghetti. If you work in an Italian restaurant and are about to get fired
anyway, this is a good way to say "Arrivederci".
- Bake a whole fuckload of weed into some muffins or cupcakes, and donate
them to your local church's next bake sale (YES I hate churches).
- Crash your local christian BBS using a scarlet box
- Or better yet use any technique for forcing your local christan BBS's line
off the hook. The fag sysop will wonder why no one is calling. Ever.
- Get 30 minutes of slo-burning blasting fuse, attach it to a smoke bomb.
During a class, ask permission to go to the can. Once you are out of the
class, find an empty locker. Put the bomb inside the locker, and lite the
fuse. Half an hour later, while you are daydreaming in algebra class, the
fuckin' thing will go off and as long as you weren't seen planting the
thing you cannot be traced to the event.
- Same drill as above only use a whole fuckin' string of M-60s or
screechers. Oh, P.S., make sure to shut the locker but not lock it. If a
teacher went by and saw an empty locker with a fuse burning attached to
god-knows-what, he will put it out. And schools have been known to
investigate by fingerprinting EVERYONE. (If it goes off then fingerprints
are destroyed, you're home-free)
- Buy a whole bunch of different magazines, and take out the "READER SERVICE"
cards. Fill out the cards with your enemy's name and address on them, and
circle ALL the numbers. If there is a line on the card for business name
put in "John's Gay Apparels" or some other fag name like that that uses
the goof's name. Put a stamp on each card and dump them all in the mailbox.
In a few weeks the motherfucker will be on every mailing list in the
WORLD, and Christ, will he know it! He will also be getting mail addressed
to fag companies. If he confronts you with this, it will be all you can do
to keep from cracking up laughing. Two TV shops in town waged war this way
for months last summer!
Well that's it for now. If you didn't get too many laughs out of reading
this file, then you will when you try this stuff.
you sit up at night with voodoo dolls a lot , don't you :helpsmile:Originally posted by SexualFartening@24 February 2004 - 04:19
everything SexualFartening just posted
it’s an election with no Democrats, in one of the whitest states in the union, where rich candidates pay $35 for your votes. Or, as Republicans call it, their vision for the future.
Originally posted by SexualFartening@24 February 2004 - 08:19
Crazy Glue does the Job for You!!
KRAZY GLUE TRICKS:
- Krazy Glue someone's doors and windows shut.
- Krazy Glue someone's school locker shut...only while ALL his books are in
it.
- Krazy Glue someone's gym or pool locker shut...only while his clothes are
in it.
- Krazy Glue that dick of a teacher or prof into his office or classroom.
This is better done to a second floor or higher room.
- Krazy Glue the clappers on all the fire bells in your school fixed. (thanx
to a PIPELINE user for this one)
- Krazy Glue the mike switch and power switch of your school's PA system on.
Then you can hear what REALLY goes on in there...All day!
- If you can get into his car, Krazy Glue your favorite dick's steering
wheel so it can't turn.
- Put a few drops of Krazy Glue in the keyhole of a door or the key ignition
of a car, so the key either won't go in or won't turn if it does go in.
- If your school's AudioVisual equipment is connected to cable, and if your
cable system has it, Krazy Glue the Channel dial stuck... on the Porno
Channel!
- Krazy Glue that Barbell to the squat rack or press bench - Only Hercules
will be able to lift that 20-pound Wimp-bell!
- Krazy Glue the hands on all the clocks at school to 3PM or whenever school
lets out.
- Krazy Glue your favorite dick's walkman battery door SHUT. He won't know
what happened 'til his batteries run down.
- Envious of your buddy's expensive looking mechanical pencil? Well, don't
steal it cuz he'll know it's you. Instead, Krazy Glue the clicker button
at the top so it won't move when pushed. It will then run out of lead VERY
QUICKLY and can never be used again.
- Wanna REALLY fuck someone over? Krazy Glue his bike's brakes OPEN so when
he wants to stop, he can't. This trick can get a guy killed, so only use
it as MORTAL revenge.
- In winter, Krazy Glue someone's window open.
- Krazy Glue the bell clapper on a phone so it can't hit the bell when it
rings. They will wonder why no one is calling them and their friends will
wonder why no one answers.
- Let a drop or two of Krazy Glue slide down the crack between the little
post on the phone that goes down when you hang up (Not to your own fone).
The Krazy Glue will solidify causing the phone to be stuck "off the hook".
I bet if I thought hard enuf, I could come up with a fuckin' MILLION of'em!
Anyways, here's some more pranks, revenge techniques and general mayhem.
- Throw a couple of nice pretty colored smoke bombs into someones house
during a prep party.
- Perform a satanic ritual on the boulevard or sidewalk (public property) in
front of the house of the most obnoxious fundamentalist christian you know.
- Play Iron Maiden songs at full crank as you drive by a church on Sunday
Morning.
- Same drill, only at a christian "record burning" revival.
- Your worst enemy has finally died, and you are not accused of his demise.
Moon his funeral procession.
- Shit on his gravestone.
- Paint his gravestone Flourescent pink.
- That god-damn baptist preacher has gone and convinced town council to ban
dancing and rock'n'roll. Paint his church flourescent pink. Or use some of
the above Krazy Glue tricks.
- Or burn him in effigy. Where he can see.
- If you work in a fast-food restaurant, piss in the fry vat.
- If you read the July '81 National Lampoon, you have heard this one: Steal
a heavy earth-mover, like a bulldozer or backhoe. Right around 4 AM, when
the sprinklers have been going all night, drive all around a golf course
in one of these. The ground is so soft from the sprinklers being on all
night that you will really fuck it up good, especially the greens. And
they cost a LOT of money to fix.
- I read in Easyriders magazine this month about a prisoner who sent all the
guards at his pen to hospital by taking a "big healthy shit" in the
spaghetti. If you work in an Italian restaurant and are about to get fired
anyway, this is a good way to say "Arrivederci".
- Bake a whole fuckload of weed into some muffins or cupcakes, and donate
them to your local church's next bake sale (YES I hate churches).
- Crash your local christian BBS using a scarlet box
- Or better yet use any technique for forcing your local christan BBS's line
off the hook. The fag sysop will wonder why no one is calling. Ever.
- Get 30 minutes of slo-burning blasting fuse, attach it to a smoke bomb.
During a class, ask permission to go to the can. Once you are out of the
class, find an empty locker. Put the bomb inside the locker, and lite the
fuse. Half an hour later, while you are daydreaming in algebra class, the
fuckin' thing will go off and as long as you weren't seen planting the
thing you cannot be traced to the event.
- Same drill as above only use a whole fuckin' string of M-60s or
screechers. Oh, P.S., make sure to shut the locker but not lock it. If a
teacher went by and saw an empty locker with a fuse burning attached to
god-knows-what, he will put it out. And schools have been known to
investigate by fingerprinting EVERYONE. (If it goes off then fingerprints
are destroyed, you're home-free)
- Buy a whole bunch of different magazines, and take out the "READER SERVICE"
cards. Fill out the cards with your enemy's name and address on them, and
circle ALL the numbers. If there is a line on the card for business name
put in "John's Gay Apparels" or some other fag name like that that uses
the goof's name. Put a stamp on each card and dump them all in the mailbox.
In a few weeks the motherfucker will be on every mailing list in the
WORLD, and Christ, will he know it! He will also be getting mail addressed
to fag companies. If he confronts you with this, it will be all you can do
to keep from cracking up laughing. Two TV shops in town waged war this way
for months last summer!
Well that's it for now. If you didn't get too many laughs out of reading
this file, then you will when you try this stuff.
jus might try 1 of those
If you have an airplane...Originally posted by Zedaxax@23 February 2004 - 20:56
Image Resized
Image Resized
[img]http://www.neowin.net/forum/uploads/post-81-1072566971.jpg' width='200' height='120' border='0' alt='click for full size view'>
(but ppl are just humans, I don't think that is so well. Maybe if feelings are
strong.)
Look on this:
Image censored
you sit up at night with voodoo dolls a lot , don't you :helpsmile: [/b][/quote]Originally posted by vidcc+24 February 2004 - 19:38--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (vidcc @ 24 February 2004 - 19:38)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-SexualFartening@24 February 2004 - 04:19
everything SexualFartening just posted
More Mayhem:
- Take the hinge pins out of a door at your school. Shut the door. Next time
someone goes to open it, FOOM! Down it goes.
- In your science lab, shut a door and set the dome of a Van de Graaf
generator against the doorknob. Turn it on and leave. Next sucker to use
that door get the ZAP of his fuckin' lifetime.
- Take a picture of your favorite goof. get a cheap black&white 8x10 blowup
made, and photocopy it. On the copy, under the picture, write GOOF in big
letters. Make 200 copies, and post them everywhere (best to get them
printed by a printing company if you make a whole shitload of copies).
Next time dickhead looks at a school bulletin board, his hair will stand
on end.
- Dump a vanload of garbage on your enemy's front lawn.
- Put a few dead fish in a school locker, and lock it. If the locker has
vents (and they all do! then in a few days that entire WING of the school
will just fuckin' REEK!
- Spray "fart spray" (from your local trick & joke shop) EVERYWHERE.
- When you go on a date with a really ugly bitch (on a dare or whatever)
make sure to eat two dozen BRAN MUFFINS beforehand. Your farting will make
the ugly wench run for the hills!
- Better yet, do the farting thing whenever you are forced to go to church.
- You know that temporary spray paint kids put in their hair at Halloween?
Paint your neighbors' cat or dog with that stuff. I strongly recommend
flourescent pink, orange, and green.
- If you REALLY hate your neighbor or his pet, spray the animal with
PERMANENT paint. Same colours.
- Or, keep your neighbors' pet's hairstyle in fashion. Give his pet a Mohawk.
- If you work in an arcade and you think you may be fired soon, a good
way to get back is to paint contact explosive inside the coin drops of all
the machines.
- A variation of this technique for those who don't work in arcades is to
cover your quarters with contact explosive before inserting them in the
slot. As long as you don't play for more than 5 minutes or so you are
pretty much assured that it can't go off while you are playing, but once
it dries.......
- Put a few drops of Krazy Glue on the winding knob of your enemy's analog
watch. If he has a digital, seal the buttons and the back panel with Krazy
Glue.
- Break into that asshole's locker. Steal all his valuables and B U R N
his texts, notes, and library books. He will get in SO much shit.........
- You all saw MASH the movie. You know then about how Hot Lips and Maj.
Burns were caught going at it in her tent by a mike which broadcast the
event to the whole camp...Do that to someone you suspect is a fag. Only
broadcast it so everyone in TOWN can hear it.
- Your enemy's car carries too much dead weight in the form of batteries.
Replace that big unsightly battery with a 9 volt. This way only his radio
will work.
- Pour CONCENTRATED Hydrochloric acid all over your enemy's bike's chain,
derailleurs, etcetera. If, the next day, he still rides it, repeat until
the acid has turned the bike to DUST.
- Strip his expensive Cinelli of all those confusing hi-tech parts and
replace them with simple, economical parts from Canadian Tire or K Mart.
- Find a liquid high-explosive that does not react with water or gasoline.
Pour it into his Yamaha's tank. (NOTE If I catch anyone doin' this to a
Harley I will take great pleasure in slowly killing them)
- Paint a penis and balls onto the side of his car.
- Load the back of his truck with horse manure and cowpies.
- Raise locusts. Once you have about a hundred thousand or so of them, set
them free in your enemy's garden.
- Plant marijuana in your enemy's garden (but not at the same time that you
do the locust trick). Go to nearest pay-phone, and dutifully report him.
Make sure you remain anonymous.
- Rip off an outboard motor. Fasten it to a sharpened telephone pole and
aim it in the general direction of the milling boats at the yacht club.
(This prank came from National Lampoon magazine, July 1981. And it works.)
- Unplug the speakers of your school's Apples. All of them.
- Write your enemy's phone number on every men's room wall you see.
- Write to your local AIDS society, asking about ways to tell if you have
AIDS. Include a stamped envelope with your enemy's name and address on it.
- Take all the toilet paper in the men's room home with you. Get your
girlfriend to do the same to the ladies' room.
- Have your autodialer dial your enemy, for a few hours.
- Your enemy isn't going ANYWHERE.... If you have removed his car's wheels
and replaced them with wooden blocks. Leave him a note telling how much
stress you are saving him by not letting him go to work.
- Give your enemy's kid a whole bag of hard candies. When he gets home and
tells your enemy (his parents) all about that neat stranger that gave him
a whole bag of candy, your enemy will FREAK.
- Did you know that some people still freak out when you throw a foam rubber
brick at a window or TV screen? Get one at your local trick and joke shop
and get ready for a whole lotta laughs.
- Those emergency stop buttons on escalators really work! Try it sometime.
- Get your enemy drunk and give him a Mohawk while he is passed out.
- Put up a FOR SALE sign in front of your enemy's house. Or put one on his
car.
- People still fall for thumbtacks on chairs. Give that one a try too.
- Get a HARD CORE porno hi-res graphic on disk for a comodore. Take this
disk to a Zellers or Kmart or other big store that sells c0modores. Do
this during a big rush so the salesmen don't bug you. Load up the graphic,
but don't display it. Write a short BASIC program to display a text screen
or something for a few minutes or so, to give you time to GET OUT. After a
few minutes, the store's display machine should then go into graphic mode
and VOILA! Hi-res porno before a crowd of shocked shoppers and embarrased
salesmen.
Well, I hoped you liked these pranks too. Try to use as many of them as
possible and you will have the biggest grin on your block.
Maybe we should ask I.News.
Wiz.
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