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Thread: Quotes About Cats

  1. #1
    hippychick's Avatar Memo, what memo? BT Rep: +5
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    Dec 2003
    In a State Of Confusion
    Quotes About Cats

    Cats names are more for human benefit. They give one a certain degree more confidence that the animal belongs to you.
    --Alan Ayckbourn "Table Manners"

    Cat: a soft indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.
    --Ambrose Bierce

    Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you.
    --Mary Bly

    The real measure of a day's heat is the length of a sleeping cat.
    --Charles J. Brady

    A cat isn't fussy - just so long as you remember he likes his milk in the shallow, rose-patterned saucer and his fish on the blue plate. From which he will take it, and eat it off the floor.
    --Arthur Bridges

    Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously.
    --Dr Louis J. Camuti

    I love cats because I love my home and after a while they become its visible soul.
    --Jean Cocteau

    There are no ordinary cats.

    Authors like cats because they are such quiet, lovable, wise creatures, and cats like authors for the same reasons.
    --Robertson Davies

    Cat-lovers will no doubt point out that the elegance and dignity of cats are the consequence of their sojourn in the temples of the gods, where their attitudes and movements were regarded as divine prognostications. Be that as it may, it is obvious that the cat's wealth of expressions make it an ideal candidate for such a role. Unlike the dog, which either wags its tail or does not wag its tail, the cat possesses a wide range of means to convey its emotions: It arches its back, makes its fur stand on end, meows, rubs itself against furniture and against humans, purrs, lashes its tail, spits, and hisses. The priests of Bacht, therefore, had ample material for interpretation.
    --Philippe Diolé, French biologist. "At the Service of the Heart"

    Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well.
    --Missy Dizick

    Before a cat will condescend
    To treat you as a trusted friend,
    Some little token of esteem
    Is needed, like a dish of cream.
    --T. S. Eliot

    When a Cat adopts you there is nothing to be done about it except to put up with it until the wind changes.
    --T. S. Eliot

    The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
    --W. C. Fields

    The cat is a dilettante in fur.
    --Theophile Gautier

    Cats were put into the world to disprove the dogma that all things were created to serve man.
    --Paul Gray

    What's virtue in a man can't be virtue in a cat.
    --Gail Hamilton

    Cat: A pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs and patronizes human beings.
    --Oliver Herford

    Some people say man is the most dangerous animal on the planet. Obviously those people have never met an angry cat.
    --Lillian Johnson

    Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
    --Garrison Keillor

    If cats could talk, they would lie to you.
    --Rob Kopack

    The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.
    --Doug Larson

    If a fish is the movement of water embodied, given shape, then cat is a diagram and pattern of subtle air.
    --Doris Lessing "Particularly Cats"

    No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
    --Abraham Lincoln

    I gave my cat a bath the other day ... they love it. He sat there, he enjoyed it, it was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that . . .
    --Steve Martin

    There has never been a cat
    Who couldn't calm me down
    By walking slowly
    Past my chair
    --Rod McKuen

    When the tea is brought at five o'clock
    And all the neat curtains are drawn with care,
    The little black cat with bright green eyes
    Is suddenly purring there.
    --Harold Monro "Milk for the Cat"

    When I play with my cat, who knows if I am not a pastime for her more than she is to me?
    --Michel deMontaigne

    Pussy-cat, pussy-cat, where have you been?
    I've been to London to look at the Queen.
    Pussy-cat, pussy-cat, what did you there?
    I frightened a little mouse under the chair.
    --Mother Goose

    The trouble with a kitten is that...
    It becomes a cat!
    --Ogden Nash

    Cats are to dogs what modern people are to the people we used to have. Cats are slimmer, cleaner, more attractive, disloyal, and lazy....Cats are irresponsible and recognize no authority, yet are completely dependent on others for their material needs. Cats cannot be made to do anything useful. Cats are mean for the fun of it. In fact, cats possess so many of the same qualities as some people (expensive girlfriends, for instance) that it's often hard to tell the people and the cats apart.
    --P. J. O'Rourke

    A cat pours his body on the floor like water.
    --William Lyon Phelps

    Cats are a waste of fur.
    --Rita Rudner

    When the cat's away, chances are he's been run over.
    --Michael Sanders

    There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.
    --Albert Schweitzer

    One is never sure, watching two cats washing each other, whether it's affection, the taste, or a trial run for the jugular.
    --Helen Thomson

    One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.
    --Mark Twain

    Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.
    --Jeff Valdez

    It is impossible to keep a straight face in the presence of one or more kittens.
    --Cynthia E. Varnado

    A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend.
    --Robert J. Vogel

    If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.
    --Alfred North Whitehead

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  3. Funny S**t   -   #2
    good try


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