# Thread: Hell?, exothermic or endothermic

1. Subject: Hell?

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University
of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so
"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the
Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of
enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's
Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed)
or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell
and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can
safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore,no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
religions state that if you are not a member of their religion,
you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one
religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number
of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the
rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states
that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay
the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and

take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then

number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over,
it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the
existence of a divine being which explains why, last night,
Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

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3. Brilliant

4. It's an old one (Bash Quote), and has been warped from whether it was originally endo or exothemic to variations of both.

Still, it's an internet classic - Bit like the Oedipus essay

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