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Thread: buying a PC Abbott & Costello style

  1. #1
    Buying a computer A takeoff on Abbott & Costello's timeless classic "Who's On First."

    ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

    COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

    ABBOTT: Mac?

    COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

    ABBOTT: Your computer?

    COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

    ABBOTT: Mac?

    COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

    ABBOTT: What about Windows?

    COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

    ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

    COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows?

    ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

    COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

    ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

    OSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got?

    ABBOTT: Office.

    COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

    ABBOTT: I just did.

    COSTELLO: You just did what?

    ABBOTT: Recommend something.

    COSTELLO: You recommended something?

    ABBOTT: Yes.

    COSTELLO: For my office?

    ABBOTT: Yes

    COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

    ABBOTT: Office.

    COSTELLO:.Yes, for my office!

    ABBOTT: I recommend Office For Windows.

    COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, let's just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal.

    What do I need?

    ABBOTT: Word.

    COSTELLO: What word?

    ABBOTT: Word in Office.

    COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

    ABBOTT: The Word in Office For Windows.

    COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

    ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue w

    COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?

    ABBOTT: Yes, you want RealOne.

    COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. what I watch is none of your business. just tell me what I need!

    ABBOTT: RealOne.

    COSTELLO: If its a long movie I also want to see reels 2, 3 & 4. can I watch them?

    ABBOTT: Of course.

    COSTELLO: Great, with what?

    ABBOTT: RealOne.

    COSTELLO; OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?

    ABBOTT: You click the blue 1.

    COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

    ABBOTT: The blue 1.

    COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?

    ABBOTT: the blue 1 is RealOne and the blue w is Word.

    COSTELLO: What word?

    ABBOTT: The Word in Office For Windows.

    COSTELLO: But there's three words in office for windows!

    ABBOTT: No, just one. but its the most popular Word in the world.

    COSTELLO: It is?

    ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.

    COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

    ABBOTT: RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne isn't even part of Office.

    COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. what about financial book keeping you have anything I can track my money with?

    ABBOTT: Money.

    COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

    ABBOTT: Money.

    COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

    ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

    COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?

    ABBOTT: Money

    COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

    ABBOTT: yes. no extra charge.

    COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

    ABBOTT: One copy

    COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

    ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

    COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

    ABBOTT: Why not, they own it?

    a few days later

    ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

    COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

    ABBOTT: Click on "START".......

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  3. Funny S**t   -   #2
    DanB's Avatar Smoke weed everyday
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    London, so fuck y'all

  4. Funny S**t   -   #3
    peat moss's Avatar Software Farmer BT Rep: +15BT Rep +15BT Rep +15
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    May 2003
    Delta B.C. Canada
    Very good !

  5. Funny S**t   -   #4
    Quote Originally Posted by peat moss
    Very good !
    Wish I could take credit but cut and pasted from work site.But the more that enjoy the better.
    Last edited by accat13; 06-27-2005 at 10:34 AM.

  6. Funny S**t   -   #5
    baccyman's Avatar n00b BT Rep: +11BT Rep +11BT Rep +11
    Join Date
    Oct 2002

  7. Funny S**t   -   #6
    NeoTheOne's Avatar Poster
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    LMFAO LOL good one


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