Depression

[Adster]

To whom it may concern

I have Been through the depression ideal through the entire of last year and seriously thought about pulling the chain several times,(explaisn why I came onto this board) then I thought to myself that would be extremely selfish to my family and friends that is teh easy way out and means you wouldn't achieve anything in this so called life we have here on earth.

I recently had a few months ago a bets friend i had for teh past 12 years commit suicide the guy was a great friend always laughed then all of a sudden just a sudden change, as I knew that he was never going to be the same person again.

Suicide is really not the way to go coz all it does is hurt the family and friends around you. it's teh only thing thats keeping me going on this earth.

Yes depression is a pain in the ass to get rid of and I stil am trying to shake it off myself

All I can say is keep your head up and smile yes easy said then done I know

[internet.news]

To whoever you are
( I haven’t' got a clue who you are as your good friends respected your privacy so much),


Don't really know your scenario but suicide is a lot bigger than getting smashed, trashing your house, or even cutting your wrists. One second you are you, the next second it's you no more. You won't have the next thought in your head you were going to have. You won't see what happens the next day. Your intelligence is gone, your humour is gone, your memory of your battle is gone.

I used to be a counsellor and therefore accept that all the words you have seen before you on this thread are just part of your "story" but dude - you may get a happy ending whatever the situation. Don’t you want to be on the other side of this knowing how strong you were to survive it now that you are in a better situation?

Thoughts of suicide can be your best friend at crap times when you can go along with whatever shit's happening knowing you got an escape route. It can be so seductively easy to fall in love with the struggle. Forget about it - it's keeping you in this spiral. Sure, at first not having a safety net will make it feel more raw but I hope you've got the balls for that - if not I hope you can get some (please try to find the metaphorical meaning rather than the actual if you are a "she").


For me, yeah…….life's been shit the last few months (well documented on this forum) but the amount of times I was ready to go all out during that ………...


<could have died and my daughters dad would be dead>


……...now I am glad I didn&#39;t. Even though things are still fucked up and it’s been 3 months since my 2 yr old daughter was abducted. I still might see her again if I keep going. Same for you, there&#39;s a lot of "maybes” out there - if you keep going&#33;.

Like I said at the beginning, I haven’t got a clue who you are so this post is pretty generalised and will probably seem irrelevant - just want to get the point over that you don&#39;t know what your happy ending would have been if you had already pressed [stop]. You also wouldn’t have been able to see how dumb this post was if you had gone half way through then quit. At the moment you live in “time”, - you are not ready to leave that position no matter how much pain you are in. Emotional pain can be the making of a person sometimes and as, I hope, you will survive this it gives you the opportunity to build your character and get deeper with yourself – it can also make people bitter so that’s something to watch out for.

All my best,

Sam4 (PM me and we can arrange to meet on MSN if you want in complete confidentiality)


Guess what&#39;s at the bottom of this post........









..........[something you wouldn’t have seen if you had already disappeared yourself – the next thing you wait to see might actually be something cool].

[hobbes]

Yeah cool, nothing like a post from Hobbes. You want to miss that? Hell, I don&#39;t even know what I am going to post and sometimes I surprise myself.

Suicide does nothing but cause a bridge of pain to span generations.

I would like to know whether you are suffering grief or are suffering from depression.

People like Sam4 have had their world flipped over and have a very specific source of grief. This is treated by time and friends.

Other people feel depressed for no definable reason, these people can benefit greatly from anti-depressants. I had a friend in this position. After 3 months on therapy he said, "I can&#39;t believe I thinking that way, thank God for a those miracle pills". He is alive and well, very well.

[shn]

Things will cheer up. It helps to talk about what your going through to people that are close to you.

[nahan]

Well I havent posted here in some time ,I hope for the sake of your friends and family you give your future the chance that is deserves to blossom into what should be.
You must be going through a rough patch in your life and must be hard to deal with the reality ,unfortunenlty life is about ups and downs.
In order to get on with the present you have to make plans for the future.
Things you want to do and accomplish.

Maybe show those that have put you down know that your better off without them,
and its their loss for doing so.

[thewizeard]

I am not sure who you are or what the cause of your depression is, but I do know that a lot of good people have posted here...all of whom I have learnt to care about since I have been a member. So realise that they are your friends and that they really care about you. Time passes and this experience will be a source of enrichment for you.... later you might be able to help someone who also is on the brink....So hang on in.

[evildon]

I don&#39;t know who this is...

I have considered it from time to time....always pulled back...mostly my friends and music keep me going....

[mrcall1969]

Hey Mate, hang in there. I wont pretend to know how you feel and I can&#39;t say anuthing more than what has already been said. All I can say is that without you we probably wouldn&#39;t be here, I know I for one wouldn&#39;t be.

Your wit and sense of humour has cheered me up more times than I can remember, probably more than you know yourself.

I don&#39;t think you realise just how many people there is that love and respect you.

I for one can&#39;t wait til your back with us in 1 place or another.

Take care mate.

Marc.

[CocoColaNut]

Life can be a real mess, I know. I was an abused child by both my divorced, alcoholic parents, I was almost sexually assaulted by my mother&#39;s boyfriend at age 6, "Mother" got there in time drunk, and after he got off my bed also drunk, started throwing up on the kitchen floor, then my mother "woke" me up. I was pretending I was sleeping, at only 6, I was terrified, I thought her boyfriend was trying to kill me. Then she actually made me clean up the throwup while she was having sex with him in another room.
My father beat me severely for no reason, then gave me money to say he was sorry. He did that for years and years. Threw me down the stairs too many times to count.
Both my sister and brother deserted me over a family issue that was not my fault.

Many, many many times I contemplated suicide, but if I did, I would have never had my beautiful son, never would&#39;ve have the family that "adopted" me from my husband&#39;s side which gave me the chance to have a normal family life I so desperately needed, never been able to help others that were or still are in the same situation as I was, and the cycle of abuse that ran in my family for generations would have never been broken if it wasn&#39;t for me. Along with the good, the bad things that can happen to you adds to your own wisdom. What helped me is now I realize that I learned A LOT from my situation. I&#39;m not bitter, just wiser. Forgiveness towards others and yourself is a big part of it. Harboring hate can eat you alive if you let it. Also harboring pity for yourself will not help you... it didn&#39;t help me. The only thing you get from self pity or pity from others towards you will only make yourself feel even more miserable about yourself and lost. Pity doesn&#39;t help. Also, the people in your life that might&#39;ve hurt you, don&#39;t expect apologies from them if they don&#39;t want to be forgiven. What&#39;s important is that you forgive them within yourself. If they don&#39;t want your forgiveness, then they don&#39;t want it. That&#39;s their loss and their frustration, not yours because you have already forgiven them within yourself. If there are people in your life that you hurt, and they don&#39;t want to forgive you, some things you can&#39;t change and some people you can&#39;t change. No matter how badly you want it. They may not forgive you, but if you are sincere in your heart then you should be guilt free. And again, that&#39;s their loss, not yours... and their frustration. Not yours.

Everyone at one time or another creates expectations for themselves. Goals, etc...But sometimes they can be too high, and when they are not reached they consider themselves a failure. No one is perfect and everyone has limits. Too many people compare themselves with everyone else without realizing that those they are comparing themselves with have their own ups and downs that they don&#39;t know about. While some are good with some things, they may not be good with others. No career, no material things you may own or not own, no financial straits, no family problems are worth taking your life to avoid. You never know what could happen tomorrow. Many times when I was "down", I was surprised the next day, the next week, etc. etc. When you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go is up. Guaranteed there will be a way you can go back up again. Don&#39;t give up or look down when you start. "Our greatest accomplishment in life is not in never falling... but in rising every time we fall".

From what I read above, I don&#39;t know you, but I get the feeling
you are a lot like me... a person who feels quite alone, walking in the dark with just a lit candle. You help people with your kindness, your sense of humor and hard work. Some are grateful towards you for it, some take advantage of it. But guess what.. you are not alone&#33; I&#39;m there and so are many others. With our own candles. Please use your wisdom toward those who don&#39;t have candles and are wandering in the darkness blind.
Think about it.
Love,
Ann

[4th gen]

Originally posted by CocoColaNut@28 February 2004 - 01:37
Life can be a real mess, I know. I was an abused child by both my divorced, alcoholic parents, I was almost sexually assaulted by my mother&#39;s boyfriend at age 6, "Mother" got there in time drunk, and after he got off my bed also drunk, started throwing up on the kitchen floor, then my mother "woke" me up. I was pretending I was sleeping, at only 6, I was terrified, I thought her boyfriend was trying to kill me. Then she actually made me clean up the throwup while she was having sex with him in another room.
My father beat me severely for no reason, then gave me money to say he was sorry. He did that for years and years. Threw me down the stairs too many times to count.
Both my sister and brother deserted me over a family issue that was not my fault.

Many, many many times I contemplated suicide, but if I did, I would have never had my beautiful son, never would&#39;ve have the family that "adopted" me from my husband&#39;s side which gave me the chance to have a normal family life I so desperately needed, never been able to help others that were or still are in the same situation as I was, and the cycle of abuse that ran in my family for generations would have never been broken if it wasn&#39;t for me. Along with the good, the bad things that can happen to you adds to your own wisdom. What helped me is now I realize that I learned A LOT from my situation. I&#39;m not bitter, just wiser. Forgiveness towards others and yourself is a big part of it. Harboring hate can eat you alive if you let it. Also harboring pity for yourself will not help you... it didn&#39;t help me. The only thing you get from self pity or pity from others towards you will only make yourself feel even more miserable and lost. Pity doesn&#39;t help. Also, the people in your life that might&#39;ve hurt you, don&#39;t expect apologies from them if they don&#39;t want to be forgiven. What&#39;s important is that you forgive them within yourself. If they don&#39;t want your forgiveness, then they don&#39;t want it. That&#39;s their loss and their frustration, not yours because you have already forgiven them. If there are people in your life that you hurt, and they don&#39;t want to forgive you, some things you can&#39;t change and some people you can&#39;t change. No matter how badly you want it. They may not forgive you, but if you are sincere in your heart then you should be guilt free. And again, that&#39;s their loss, not yours... and their frustration. Not yours.

Everyone at one time or another creates expectations for themselves. Goals, etc...But sometimes they can be too high, and when they are not reached they consider themselves a failure. No one is perfect and everyone has limits. Too many people compare themselves with everyone else without realizing that those they are comparing themselves with have their own ups and downs that they don&#39;t know about. While some are good with some things, they may not be good with others. No career, no material things you may own or not own, no financial straits, no family problems are worth taking your life to avoid. You never know what could happen tomorrow. Many times when I was "down", I was surprised the next day, the next week, etc. etc. When you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go is up. Guaranteed there will be a way you can go back up again. Don&#39;t give up or look down when you start. "Our greatest accomplishment in life is not in never falling... but in rising every time we fall".

From what I read above, I don&#39;t know you, but I get the feeling
you are a lot like me... a person who feels quite alone, walking in the dark with just a lit candle. You help people with your kindness, your sense of humor and hard work. Some are grateful towards you for it, some take advantage of it. But guess what.. you are not alone&#33; I&#39;m there and so are many others. With our own candles. Please use your wisdom toward those who don&#39;t have candles and are wandering in the darkness blind.
Think about it.
Love,
Ann

At the risk of trivialising your post, I have to say it&#39;s one of the most moving stories I&#39;ve ever read. Very meaningful, poignant.

Welcome to the forum, I hope you enjoy your time here