Originally posted by haxor41789@29 February 2004 - 06:19
FREE SHIT AT McDonald's
Yes, I do mean shit... If you are involved in that fucking money crunch
like everyone else, and you feel that your money should be spent on better
things, rather than shitty food, here are a few pointers for free food.
These have all been tested. If you are caught in the act of getting free
food, nothing will happen, and it will be a big source of amusement...
* Cheeseburger
On a busy drive-thru day, you can ask for a special order. Ask for a
hamburger with an extra item, like mustard or something, and casually
sneak in "extra cheese." If the employees are stupid enough (a given),
and the grill doesn't question it, you will find yourself with a nice
fresh cheeseburger for the price of a hamburger... whoopee...
* Any Item
The BEST thing to do is order something in the drivethru, and then
come in the restaurant with the bag from drive thru and say "You
forgot ..." If you ask the employees at the counter, 9 times out of
10, you will get it... To be on the safe side, you may want to go
home, call the McDonald's, say you went through the drive thru and you
didn't get your food item. You can give a bullshit name or whatever,
usually they don't even take the name, and the next time you go in,
you say you called, and you will get gift certificates or free food...
works every time.
BASTARDIZING FOOD ITEMS
If you want to attract a certain degree of attention to yourself, and make
employees and customers laugh, when you order food, fuck up the names to
say something cool... You'll still get the food you don't want, and this
too is a source of amusement. Spur-of-the-moment name bastardizations are
by far the funniest, but here are a few suggestions...
* SHMEGMA MAC, SHMEGMA SACK - instead of Mega Mac (shmegma is Dick Cheese)
* CHICKEN McFUCKUPS - Chicken McNuggets (be sure to ask for the 69 piece)
* McDICKEN - McChicken (ask for extra Mayo and smile...)
* CHOKE - Coke (I'd like a small choke with no ice)
* McRIBBED FOR HER PLEASURE - McRib... Do they still make this?
* FAGINA - Fajita (I'd like a FAGINA with extra cheese...)
IMPORTANT
Remember that McDonald's slogan is Food, Folks, and Fun... Just take the
"fun" part to the limit... You sort of have to compensate for the asshole
"folks" and the shit "food."
If you get bored, start harassing kids on the playland or just break
shit... throwing salt shakers (plastic or glass) at the outside wall of the
McDonald's is fun too... take advantage of whatever there is in
McDonald's... there are infinite possibilities to create your local
McDonald's an utter McHell. Don't consider it illegal (most of it isn't...)
consider it more of a public service. Yeah... That's it.
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