baccyman
01-18-2006, 01:59 PM
Subject: TIP OF THE WEEK:
If you feel you may be too drunk to drive, walk to the nearest pizza shop, place an order, and when they go to deliver it, catch a ride home with them.
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A man walks into the dentist's office with a toothache, and after the dentist examines him, he says, "That tooth has to come out. I'm going to give you a shot of Novocain and I'll be back in a few minutes."
The man grabs the dentist's arm, "No way.. I hate needles. I'm not having any shot!"
So the dentist says, "Okay, we'll go with the gas."
The man replies, "Absolutely not. It makes me sick for a couple of days. I'm not having gas."
So the dentist steps out and comes back with a glass of water. "Here," he says. " Take this pill."
The man asks, "What is it?"
The doc replies, "Viagra."
The man looks surprised, "Will that kill the pain?"
"No," replies the dentist, "but it will give you something to hang on to while I pull your tooth."
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A popular blonde cheerleader bounced into the local card shop, looked around, then approached the clerk.
"Do you have any, like, real special birthday cards?" she asked.
"Yes, we do," he replied. "As a matter of fact, here's a new one. It's inscribed, "To the Boy Who Got My Cherry."
"Wow, neat!" she squealed. "I'll take the whole box."
If you feel you may be too drunk to drive, walk to the nearest pizza shop, place an order, and when they go to deliver it, catch a ride home with them.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man walks into the dentist's office with a toothache, and after the dentist examines him, he says, "That tooth has to come out. I'm going to give you a shot of Novocain and I'll be back in a few minutes."
The man grabs the dentist's arm, "No way.. I hate needles. I'm not having any shot!"
So the dentist says, "Okay, we'll go with the gas."
The man replies, "Absolutely not. It makes me sick for a couple of days. I'm not having gas."
So the dentist steps out and comes back with a glass of water. "Here," he says. " Take this pill."
The man asks, "What is it?"
The doc replies, "Viagra."
The man looks surprised, "Will that kill the pain?"
"No," replies the dentist, "but it will give you something to hang on to while I pull your tooth."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A popular blonde cheerleader bounced into the local card shop, looked around, then approached the clerk.
"Do you have any, like, real special birthday cards?" she asked.
"Yes, we do," he replied. "As a matter of fact, here's a new one. It's inscribed, "To the Boy Who Got My Cherry."
"Wow, neat!" she squealed. "I'll take the whole box."