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100%
09-01-2006, 06:59 PM
Do you agree with this? a friend has alot of issues with his childs mother and is seeking to purify the ten commandments of seperated father.
Please advize

When you are seperated father..

1.Obey the mother in anyway, because a happy mother is a nice mother.
An unhappy mother is not nice.

2.An unhappy father is a bad father and therefore an unfit father.

3.If the kid cries when with the father, then the father has misbehaved. If the kid cries when with mom, it is the fault ofc the father who has traumatised the child.

4.When the mother denies the father to see the child, the father should stay calm and not act hastidly, because that would be seen as agression towards the mother.

5.If the father has not seen or followed up with the child for a long time, He oshould stay away so as not to disturb the mother child bond.

j2k4
09-01-2006, 07:27 PM
Do you agree with this? a friend has alot of issues with his childs mother and is seeking to purify the ten commandments of seperated father.
Please advize

When you are seperated father..

1.Obey the mother in anyway, because a happy mother is a nice mother.
An unhappy mother is not nice.

2.An unhappy father is a bad father and therefore an unfit father.

3.If the kid cries when with the father, then the father has misbehaved. If the kid cries when with mom, it is the fault ofc the father who has traumatised the child.

4.When the mother denies the father to see the child, the father should stay calm and not act hastidly, because that would be seen as agression towards the mother.

5.If the father has not seen or followed up with the child for a long time, He oshould stay away so as not to disturb the mother child bond.


A separated/divorced father should hew to the letter of any legal document bearing on the situation and it's treatment of children.

He should painstakingly document all related events.

He should address any issues through proper channels, and conduct his business with all consideration due his children.

He should suffer the slings and arrows of the child's mother without complaint to the youngster.

It should be noted that, in such cases as the "ex" suffers from psychopathic disorder, all bets are off, even though it is unlikely the fact will affect custody...:huh:

peat moss
09-02-2006, 07:46 PM
The father gets all the shit and none of the good stuff . I'm lucky that my second wife is on good terms with my ex. Communication is the key I guess .
In other words I can't talk to her yet my wife can explain why we need him early this weekend ,for a family function or the like .

I was missing all the important things like School plays or Parent teacher meetings because she did n't tell me .

Times are changing tho courts are more inclined to give custody to fathers these days . Its hard tho the little ones always suffer ,thur no fault of their own . :(

100%
09-03-2006, 11:04 AM
In other words I can't talk to her yet my wife can explain why we need him early this weekend ,for a family function or the like .

Indeed - One must always explain why you need to see the child, which is never sufficient.


I was missing all the important things like School plays or Parent teacher meetings because she did n't tell me .

that is actually quite evil, and I suspect that is something she can use agenst you,- scince you haven`t participated in the events.



Times are changing tho courts are more inclined to give custody to fathers these days . Its hard tho the little ones always suffer ,thur no fault of their own . :(
which country is this?
In Norway crack whores get higher priority than established fathers. From a story where the mother became christian the day before the court case... But yes, it is being debated.




It should be noted that, in such cases as the "ex" suffers from psychopathic disorder, all bets are off, even though it is unlikely the fact will affect custody...:huh:

which is most probably the case...


of course the mothers view of all this is the reverse.

IV's story is this : He had a one night stand with a girl he knew, she got pregnant.
She said she didn't care what he thought, and wanted the baby for herself with no involvement of IV.
IV being laid back as he was took it easy style.
Baby was born, she travelled to South America for 2 years, came back and said to IV, "you take care of the baby for a year fulltime, i want my life back"
so he did
until half a year later, she comes back and takes back the baby girl, and disallows him contact with her....

thats when IV for the first time in his life decided to get a lawyer
the rest is cliche = ten commandments

MagicNakor
09-03-2006, 12:01 PM
Without knowing which country he's in, I can't really say. I know that here it's no longer a given that the mother is the best custodial parent, and the courts tend to look at things such as lifestyle, income, child preference (age depending), and so on.

:shuriken:

peat moss
09-03-2006, 02:44 PM
I think your friend should join a Fathers support group , there should be one in his area .