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balamm
08-12-2003, 02:22 PM
Many years ago I lived in the small northern town Fort Saint James, BC. Easy lumbermill money but not much night life. On weekends, it was customary for some of us to head 40 miles south to Vanderhoof where the females were a bit more feminine and the bars stayed open later.

Every time I went with a certain friend, there was one house we'd walk by where a small yapping dog would charge furiously at us, snapping at our legs.
Anyone who knows about small yapping dogs knows there's little you can do to stop this. Yelling at the owner did no good at all.
Well, after several weeks of this, we again walked by this same house and this friend quickly reached down, grabbed the small yapping dog by the back of the neck, and screamed in it's face for several seconds. appropriate payback I thought to myself.
What came next surprised me but I can't really say it upset or shocked me.
He reached down to his side, pulled out a buck knife, cut the small yapping dogs throat and threw it back in it's yard.
Showing just a bit of satisfaction, he looked back at me waiting for a response I guess.
I just nodded and we continued on our way, never again bothered by small yapping dogs.

Moral of the story? Too deep for words.

But in simple terms- if you like to yap uncontrollably, maybe you'd better learn to maneuver and run away a bit faster when someone's had enough.
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 02:24 PM
Nice attitude....
pyromonkey
08-12-2003, 02:24 PM
:blink:
Celerystalksme
08-12-2003, 02:42 PM
:o

doesn't know whether to laugh or cry...
Lamsey
08-12-2003, 02:45 PM
Wanton disrespect for life, barbarism, delight in the death and suffering of others...


Yup, I think you got all of the traits I despise most all in one fell swoop.
kylej458
08-12-2003, 02:50 PM
That's sick and twisted in my opinion.
balamm
08-12-2003, 02:55 PM
Originally posted by kylej458@12 August 2003 - 15:50
That's sick and twisted in my opinion.
Then maybe this is the perfect place for it ;)


You may talk about anything here.

Within reason of course :blink:
namzuf9
08-12-2003, 03:28 PM
Originally posted by Lamsey@12 August 2003 - 14:45
Wanton disrespect for life, barbarism, delight in the death and suffering of others...


Yup, I think you got all of the traits I despise most all in one fell swoop.
Yeah balaam, you rock dude!http://www.theguildhall.net/vb/images/smilies/GRIM2A.gifhttp://www.theguildhall.net/vb/images/smilies/FIREdevil.gifhttp://www.theguildhall.net/vb/images/smilies/Axe_anim.gif

Edit:In case you cant tell I'm being sarcastic!!
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 03:30 PM
Maybe I shouldn't say this, but I honestly don't think this is a good thing to post....especially not as a mod....That's just IMHO ofcourse
balamm
08-12-2003, 03:44 PM
So... I was just sitting on my back porch enjoying a can of rootbeer when a large bee started hanging around me. Annoying, yes? I finally rolled up a newspaper and flattened it.

And the difference is?

This little tale with a moral to it can't possibly compare with images of feces and some of the pshyco topics posted here lately. And it was the moral that was meant to be the focus. Without refference it wouldn't mean much now would it?
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 03:47 PM
a bee doesn't have a central nervesystem, it doesn't feel pain. A dog does.


It's your choice, it was just my opinion, I'm not a mod :)
Gutter
08-12-2003, 03:53 PM
the bee was not someone's loved and cared for pet.
balamm
08-12-2003, 03:56 PM
I believe they do feel pain and fear. Just as a plant does. They just aren't able to use that information as well as they should. They don't learn from their past, it's just added into their electro-chemical database and if it's repeated enough over many generations, a new instinctual pattern emerges.
Unfortunately it's hard to contribute to the collective when you've been flattened ;)
namzuf9
08-12-2003, 04:00 PM
Thats it, I think balaam's finally cracked!!
Celerystalksme
08-12-2003, 04:05 PM
Originally posted by balamm@13 August 2003 - 01:44
So... I was just sitting on my back porch enjoying a can of rootbeer when a large bee started hanging around me. Annoying, yes? I finally rolled up a newspaper and flattened it.

And the difference is?

This little tale with a moral to it can't possibly compare with images of feces and some of the psyco topics posted here lately. And it was the moral that was meant to be the focus. Without refference it wouldn't mean much now would it?
I think balamm has a point *and for myself to agree with balamm there has to be something there*...

But yeah...im never gonna say anything controversial ever again...its like a pack of hungry dogs on a wounded cat*
Gutter
08-12-2003, 04:06 PM
Thats it, I think balaam's finally cracked!!

I'll agree, I just hope he doesn't slit the throats of any members that he feels are "yapping" too much

Or if they are small dogs.
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 04:06 PM
Is it because it's controversial we all have to agree with it? As I said, it's just my opinion, I'm not judging anyone here ;)
namzuf9
08-12-2003, 04:08 PM
Originally posted by Gutter@12 August 2003 - 16:06

Thats it, I think balaam's finally cracked!!

I'll agree, I just hope he doesn't slit the throats of any members that he feels are "yapping" too much

Or if they are small dogs.
To be honest I dont have an opinion on his original post, I could'nt give a monkey's. I'm just wondering why balaam posted it knowing that a lot of people would jump on his back about it.
Celerystalksme
08-12-2003, 04:12 PM
Originally posted by Skweeky@13 August 2003 - 02:06
Is it because it's controversial we all have to agree with it? As I said, it's just my opinion, I'm not judging anyone here ;)
i never said you were...it was just taken that way...im not here to judge anyone...im just saying my own opinion...
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 04:14 PM
good, then we're both after the same thing :)
Ron
08-12-2003, 04:44 PM
I once had this incredibly nice cucumber.

I mean, it had the right size and shape, but on top of that, it had this little bump about halfway through.
Those of you into cucumbers know what I mean.
It was perfect for prostate stimulation!!
One night, as I was playing with Razz (Krayzzed) again, I decided to try my dearest cucumber out on him.......
All went fine for a while, but when the bump reached his prostate, he went WILD!!
He started shivering, shaking, making spastic movements, and screaming......
Finally, the cucumber gave up, and.....BROKE!! :'( :'( :'(

Moral of the story: If you ever find the perfect cucumber, don't use it on a cucumber n00b. Especially if he's a minor, there's no way to sue a minor for sexual malconduct without going to prison yourself......

BTW: Happy birthday Razz!!
http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/birthday.gif
Celerystalksme
08-12-2003, 04:55 PM
has been taken to a new level of shock :o
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 04:57 PM
awwww Ron, don't worry, we can always clone it and then u have a whole bunch of them cucumbers. All you have to do is admit ketchup IS better than bolognese :D
Ron
08-12-2003, 05:16 PM
NEVER!!!

Hang on,.....
Does that mean that ketchup is made of cloned rotten tomatoes? :blink:
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 05:18 PM
erm, no....but there are people who put cucumbers in bolognese :ph34r:
Ron
08-12-2003, 05:22 PM
Originally posted by Skweeky@12 August 2003 - 19:18
erm, no....but there are people who put cucumbers in bolognese :ph34r:
USED ones? http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/puke.gif
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 05:32 PM
yes :ph34r:


Why is there a radio-active pickle in your sig Ron?
Ron
08-12-2003, 05:45 PM
A pickle in my sig? :blink:
You on drugs again skweeky?

Btw, I don't use pickles. They're too small, and they irrirate the prostate.
El_Jefe
08-12-2003, 05:48 PM
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Skweeky
08-12-2003, 05:50 PM
Another one of your evil mindtricks....It won&#39;t work Ron, give it up. <_<
Ron
08-12-2003, 05:53 PM
Hmmm, looking at E_J&#39;s comment, I suspect some foul playing from his part.....
Damn, I missed it again.

The only good MOD, is a pickled one&#33;&#33;
balamm
08-12-2003, 08:13 PM
Originally posted by namzuf9+12 August 2003 - 17:08--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (namzuf9 @ 12 August 2003 - 17:08)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
Originally posted by Gutter@12 August 2003 - 16:06

Thats it, I think balaam&#39;s finally cracked&#33;&#33;

I&#39;ll agree, I just hope he doesn&#39;t slit the throats of any members that he feels are "yapping" too much

Or if they are small dogs.
To be honest I dont have an opinion on his original post, I could&#39;nt give a monkey&#39;s. I&#39;m just wondering why balaam posted it knowing that a lot of people would jump on his back about it. [/b]
Since pretty much everyone has missed it... This little experiment has just proved my point.

My story was unacceptable to most people while the one below was fine and elicited laughs? This is not an isolated example.

What kind of world is this?

I&#39;ve already disabled my kid&#39;s accounts but maybe it&#39;s time to adjust the rating on this site.

<!--QuoteBegin-Ron
I once had this incredibly nice cucumber.

I mean, it had the right size and shape, but on top of that, it had this little bump about halfway through.
Those of you into cucumbers know what I mean.
It was perfect for prostate stimulation&#33;&#33;
One night, as I was playing with Razz (Krayzzed) again, I decided to try my dearest cucumber out on him.......
All went fine for a while, but when the bump reached his prostate, he went WILD&#33;&#33;
He started shivering, shaking, making spastic movements, and screaming......
Finally, the cucumber gave up, and.....BROKE&#33;&#33; :&#39;(&nbsp; :&#39;(&nbsp; :&#39;(

Moral of the story: If you ever find the perfect cucumber, don&#39;t use it on a cucumber n00b. Especially if he&#39;s a minor, there&#39;s no way to sue a minor for sexual malconduct without going to prison yourself......

BTW: Happy birthday Razz&#33;&#33;&nbsp;
http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/birthday.gif[/quote]
Ron
08-12-2003, 08:17 PM
Uh oh, I&#39;m under MOD fire here....
http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/errrr.gifhttp://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/errrr.gifhttp://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/errrr.gif


/me goes into the witness protection program.
I HAVE NAMES&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;
Ron
08-12-2003, 08:46 PM
Originally posted by balamm@12 August 2003 - 22:13
I&#39;ve already disabled my kid&#39;s accounts but maybe it&#39;s time to adjust the rating on this site.

Errrmm, can&#39;t your kid still log in as a guest?


Actually, this is the lounge.
It&#39;s been this way as long as I come here.
Mayb the only reason people accepted my post and not yours, is cause they KNOW I&#39;m full of shit.
Maybe they thought there was a small possibility that your post was for real..... :ph34r:
Be honest now, between slicing a dogs throat, and breaking a cucumber, there&#39;s a world of difference, no matter how perfect the cucumber was. :&#39;(
Riddler
08-12-2003, 08:48 PM
Originally posted by balamm@12 August 2003 - 07:22
Many years ago I lived in the small northern town Fort Saint James, BC.
In a previous life as a school supply salesman, I spent a week there one afternoon....... ;) And btw, the moral of your story is a valuable one IMO, and I think the imagery was constructed for the shock value peeps. Methinks that was the point. B)
thewizeard
08-12-2003, 09:11 PM
In a previous life, before I became a human being, I used to be a small yapping dog. I lived in the town called Fort Saint James. One day I saw two young men going to the local pub, obviously looking for good beer and some pretty girls. I tried to warn them, in the only way I could by yapping at their ankels, that the pretty girls were men in drag and the beer was lousy, you never guess what one of them did to me?

In my next life I returned as a bumble bee to tell them that I had forgiven them, you&#39;ll never guess what happened to me?
Ron
08-12-2003, 09:13 PM
Don&#39;t tell me you came back as a cucumber on your third tour. :ph34r: :ph34r: :ph34r:
balamm
08-12-2003, 09:13 PM
Now that was funny&#33; :lol:
Riddler
08-12-2003, 09:13 PM
Originally posted by nigel123@12 August 2003 - 14:11
In a previous life, before I became a human being, I used to be a small yapping dog. I lived in the town called Fort Saint James. One day I saw two young men going to the local pub, obviously looking for good beer and some pretty girls. I tried to warn them, in the only way I could by yapping at their ankels, that the pretty girls were men in drag and the beer was lousy, you never guess what one of them did to me?

In my next life I returned as a bumble bee to tell them that I had forgiven them, you&#39;ll never guess what happened to me?
:lol: :lol: :lol:
TOUCHE &#33;&#33;&#33;
Gutter
11-20-2003, 03:40 AM
drugs are bad
balamm
11-20-2003, 03:51 AM
A timeless literary masterpiece :D
AussieSheila
11-20-2003, 06:14 AM
Originally posted by Celerystalksme@13 August 2003 - 02:05

But yeah...im never gonna say anything controversial ever again...its like a pack of hungry dogs on a wounded cat*
:lol: :lol: :lol:

from the mouths of cely babes.........

@ Balaam... no, I wouldn&#39;t want my kids on this forum... but I like it&#33;

B)

The shock thing worked by the way, I went eeewwwww&#33; :)