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dwightfry
11-11-2003, 03:53 PM
I've seen several people ask for advice on stuff, I figuared this would be a good time for me to try it out.

About 3 months ago I moved out of my apartment because my girlfriend was going to college and it was too much for her having to work and do college full time, also my best friend since third grade was homeless and he needed a place to stay until he and his girlfriend could find a place of there own, so I did what I felt I had to do, even though It sucked for me, we moved out, and they moved in for the remainder of the lease. Since then things have gone to total shit, I haven't felt this depressed and hopeless since highschool. (Just to give you an idea of shitty things have been. I never got a single thankyou from my friends or my girlfriend, and a month ago, while my girlfriend and I were discussing how bad things are said, "We should have stayed in the apartment, why did you make us move out?" We nearly broke up over her stress, and now I was being blamed for everything)

anyhoo...

I do sound for the local news, and commercial dubs for a tv station. I like the job but I have to be at work by 5:00 am. Afterover a year I am getting very worn out and since moving out of the apartment I make mistakes nearly every day. Nothing major, but the News Anchor is getting pissed. This morning I played the wrong music for the close (I forgot to switch tracks durring a commercial break). It ended at the right time, but she came in while I was out of the room and said "My god, how hard is it to play the right music at the end, it isn't rocket science." Obviously it doesn't feel good to have that said about you.

I have the most hours (just 2.5 hourseshort of fulltime though :( ), and by far the best pay that I have ever had. I have a major hospital bill coming, and my current living situation sucks. I am renting a tiny room out at my aunts place to sleep, and renting a tiny room at my parents place for my computer and stuff. I need the money but I don't know if it's worth doing if it makes me feel so bad nearly everyday.

I have started looking for another job already, but the hours are always too short, and the pay is always too low. I need to get out of my current living situation, and there is no way I will be able to without getting paid at least the same amount as I do here. I don't even know what kind of job I would want, plus this place is very short staffed right now, and I don't want to cause future stress on my friends here, which they most definitly will if I quit.

so to recap:

I can't stand the hours here, the feeling of worthlessness everytime I make a mistake, and some of the practices here

I can't ditch my friends here to pick up my slack, I need this job to get me out of my shitty living situation, I haven't found a job that even comes close to the pay and the hours here. And will moving to an aparment make things better, or is that just going to completely stop me from being able to quit until I get so sloppy at work they fire me, leaving me in a whole new pile of troubles.

what do I do, what dooo I doooo.

oh....and it's so dry here at work, that evertime I touch anything metal, (tape decks, soundboard, doorknobs) I get a nasty static shock. I counted 34 shocks last friday. 15 of those were before 7:00 AM. That right there is almost enough to quit.

bigboab
11-11-2003, 06:46 PM
orry thing are not working out too well at the moment Dwight. The very last thing you should do is leave your job unless you have an absolute guarantee of an immediate replacement. Stick it out. In another couple of months or so you will be wondering what you were worried about. It was a big sacrifice you made to your friends. You know that, and you did help them. If they do not appreciate that, then, that is their problem, not yours. You are still a very young man, and all these things seem to be insurmountable. They are not! As I said earlier in a couple of months you will be laughing about the needless worry. Best of luck in the future. :)

j2k4
11-11-2003, 06:50 PM
Okay, here's the deal:

For lots of reasons, you have to concentrate on your job, at the expense of some other things (girlfriend, happiness, etc.).

You obviously like the job, apart from the bullshit, but how about this:

Tell your GF that you'll have to beg her indulgence while you save your financial ass (and probably hers, too, right?), and stomp your job problems into submission with a nice big dose of concentration and competence?

It's a cinch you're distracted, but you have to rise above that; overwhelm your job with the talent you have-don't just do a "better" job-be so damned good the anchor-witch decides you have become indispensible.

The other stuff will take care of itself if you let it; sounds like your GF needs to find her sea-legs, too, and quit dumping her shit on you.

Life is a big barge, and if other people are involved in yours, they gotta pull, too.

Frankly, I have a hard time hearing people lucky enough to be able to go to college bitch about "having to work, too"; that crap is supposed to end when you become an adult, and if you create a workload you can't handle, change it, or get tougher.

There really are no other choices.

I wish you (and her) the best, Renfield. ;)


BTW-to echo bigboab's sentiment-with friends like that, who needs enemies?

Forget 'em, for good.

That kind of behavior is inexcusable.

Kitty
11-11-2003, 11:22 PM
Every time you turn a corner in this grown up world that you have entered into you seem to come up with a new problem! they never go away they just keep coming at you!! That's when you learn how to deal with it, Look at what really matters, Don't sweat the small stuff, Pull yourself up by your boot straps and push on....
Life is always going to give you problems, After awhile you'll gain some knowledge to know the difference in what's really important and what's just annoying.

I would definetly not quit your job! You would be up shit's creek without a paddle! :o Tell your girlfriend to chip in a bit more, Let the friends know how you feel and then maybe they can give you their side of the story, maybe it was an innocent "Sorry I didn't know you felt that way, come on I'll buy you a beer" sort of thing. In a few months you'll be looking back saying well..That wasn't THAT rough!!

Life gives you lessons, it's up to you what you take from them..

dwightfry
11-12-2003, 11:11 AM
Thanks a bunch you guys. I didn't expect any answers except for things like 'that sucks, sorry I can't help"

Yeah, that's just the beginning of my troubles at the moment. Other stuff I could solve but haven't had the will power too.

@j2k4 - at first I didn't care for you too much, but you know.....you're OK. ;)

I gotta head to work, thanks for the advice.

MediaSlayer
11-12-2003, 11:14 AM
Originally posted by dwightfry@12 November 2003 - 11:11

@j2k4 - at first I didn't care for you too much, but you know.....you're OK. ;)


oh he'll LOVE that!

j2k4
11-12-2003, 03:11 PM
Originally posted by MediaSlayer+12 November 2003 - 07:14--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (MediaSlayer &#064; 12 November 2003 - 07:14)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteBegin-dwightfry@12 November 2003 - 11:11

@j2k4 - at first I didn&#39;t care for you too much, but you know.....you&#39;re OK.&nbsp; ;)


oh he&#39;ll LOVE that&#33;[/b][/quote]
Nah-

We adults all think alike. We just hope someone&#39;s listening when we go off, and to be given this golden opportunity to do so is, well....sometimes I get this DAD thing goin&#39;, ya&#39; know? :lol: :lol:

Renfield:

I know what you meant, and I&#39;ll shoulder the blame; that was during my "What is wrong with you people?" phase.

I was glad to see you back here a while ago (when you weren&#39;t really gone?) &#39;cuz I wanted to set things right. ;)

UKMan
11-12-2003, 03:18 PM
I have more or less the same advice bro. Try to stick it out as best you can. One thing that you have done that might start bringing back your old self is the fact you have shared this experience with the board. Sometimes, just letting it all out to someone or in this case, a bunch of people, makes you more relaxed and the knowledge that others know your plite can be very comforting.

So stay with it and know that some of us here are on your side and rooting for ya - :D

Peace
UKMan

internet.news
11-12-2003, 03:41 PM
This is difficult I know - I cannot expect of other people sharing
their thoughts & life openly cause they are just humans, only I will
share my thoughts openly to understand each other better.

It is often difficult no to hear a "thank you", you are obviously right,
but I am happy if I meet another people like my best girlfriend - our relation/friendship is based on sharing our thoughts openly - with who I can
share my thoughts openly and to who I can trust :)

thanks for sharing :)

-- I recently searched for a small job in my freetime, cause
I want to share my life with others and I wanted to offer my help
to others. And other cannot offer me something to do I feel sometimes
useless, that is why I also would someone without getting paid just to help
someone :) but I also would not asking him more several times...
I ask someone one time probably two times if he need help and tell him
if he need help he should feel free to ask me...

~nice dreams...

dwightfry
11-12-2003, 05:39 PM
Thanks again everyone, I did feel a lot better today, it really helped that I checked for any replies before work. I had a hard time sleeping I was so nervious about today, I REALLY didn&#39;t want to go. I&#39;ve been sticking it out for 3 months now, I guess I&#39;ll have to stick it out for a little longer. Luckily I have one friend that I could actually stand living with, yesterday we started talk of getting an apt together, that may be my light at the end of the tunnel........hopefully.

UKMan
11-12-2003, 07:27 PM
Originally posted by dwightfry@12 November 2003 - 18:39
Thanks again everyone, I did feel a lot better today, it really helped that I checked for any replies before work. I had a hard time sleeping I was so nervious about today, I REALLY didn&#39;t want to go. I&#39;ve been sticking it out for 3 months now, I guess I&#39;ll have to stick it out for a little longer. Luckily I have one friend that I could actually stand living with, yesterday we started talk of getting an apt together, that may be my light at the end of the tunnel........hopefully.
who gives a f...................ha ha - jk. Nice when you´ve got some REAL friends is&#39;nt it? Good luck :D ;)

Peace
UKMan

dwightfry
11-14-2003, 11:06 AM
okay, this is the shitty luck I&#39;m talking about.

1 month ago, I started doing body work on my van. I had just spent about &#036;125 on it when the transmission cut out. I had to buy a new van, I just got done paying for it, that&#39;s why getting an apartment might have been possible. My friend who I wanted to move in with decided that he&#39;s going to try to move to Minneapolis MN, about 4 hours away.

and now this....

2 months ago I was sick (nausea, dizziness, etc), after 3 weeks it still hadn&#39;t gone away so I decided to go to a walk-in clinic for a &#036;40 check-up. I told her (the doctor) what was wrong, and she said she wanted to do some blood checks, and she gave me a shot for the Nausea that causes extreme sleepyness. I fell asleep waiting for the results and the doctor came in and said everything was fine, so if it isn&#39;t in the blood, it might be something in the head. I thought she meant psychological, then she said I could have a tumer and wanted to give me a C.A.T. scan. I don&#39;t have health insurance, I asked her how much it would be, she said probably about &#036;250. I figuared that meant &#036;400 tops, I decided to go for it even though I couldn&#39;t afford it, and really couldn&#39;t think things out very well because of he shot she gave me.......I got the bill yesterday.....&#036;700.00 just for the scan. I will be recieving another bill from the doctor which will probably be about &#036;100 because of the bloodtests, and I will be getting a third bill from the company that read the results of the scan....

It has been over 3 months of this kind of stuff....I&#39;ve gotta get a break sometime, don&#39;t I. :(

There is still one good piece of news, but we&#39;ll see how it turns out. My girlfriend applied for a job at the Humaine Society, if she gets it, she can start paying for stuff, and I can get my bills paid faster, and then maybe still move out in a few months.

UKMan
11-14-2003, 11:18 AM
Shite - i&#39;m glad i live in a country where there is a limt to how much you pay for stuff like that - tough break bro - good luck

PS: maybe you can start selling some of those mp3&#39;s and stuff you have on a street corner to some unsuspecting old fart - not me of course - :lol:

j2k4
11-14-2003, 02:48 PM
Yeah, the medical stuff never seems to stop.

Makes the payments you can, in the amounts you can, and don&#39;t miss payments.

If you need to know anything about that, let me know-I&#39;m going through it right now.

Do what you can, develop a plan, and look forward, Renfield.

Be a little more discerning about friends and their intentions-sounds like you have to eliminate some of the "iffyness" in your life. ;)

dwightfry
11-14-2003, 03:46 PM
Be a little more discerning about friends and their intentions-sounds like you have to eliminate some of the "iffyness" in your life.

That is exactly what I am trying to do. It&#39;s good to here somebody else say it though. I&#39;ve gotten a lot of advice from a lot of people and none of them said anything close to that. I had everything, then It all collapsed and I want to just jump back to the top again, but I realize now that I have to start over. Hopefully this time around things will be more stable.

j2k4
11-14-2003, 03:59 PM
Originally posted by dwightfry@14 November 2003 - 11:46

Be a little more discerning about friends and their intentions-sounds like you have to eliminate some of the "iffyness" in your life.

That is exactly what I am trying to do. It&#39;s good to here somebody else say it though. I&#39;ve gotten a lot of advice from a lot of people and none of them said anything close to that. I had everything, then It all collapsed and I want to just jump back to the top again, but I realize now that I have to start over. Hopefully this time around things will be more stable.
There you go. ;)

Hang in, huh?