i have an orsum story to tell

[Mr. Mulder]

involving slightly chubby but still hawt teen girls, a sex accident resulting in blood, my third experience with cocaine and also, Gillette shaving cream ...as soon as i can be bothered to type it up :eyebrows:

[NotLettingItGo]

I bet... he cut himself shaving whilst high on coke, having a trip about what the teenage girls down the street would like to do to him.

[mjmacky]

involving slightly chubby but still hawt teen girls, a sex accident resulting in blood, my third experience with cocaine and also, Gillette shaving cream ...as soon as i can be bothered to type it up :eyebrows:

Taking down the drapes on a FUPA can easily lead to these kinds of accidents, what with all the folds. No speculation as to what role cocaine played, but it's always sort of an accessory variable; thus not typically relevant to the main story.

[NotLettingItGo]

Oh! I see, he was trying to make himself look like a teenager again. So that's how the teenager angle got in there. I have to say Mulder, it'd be easier and less painful to make yourself look like a teen boy, the whole cutting so deep that you end up looking like a 'hawt teen girl' thing, isn't going to work. It does explain the blood though.

[manker]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.

in other news, mulder already shaves all of his body hair before he goes out into the world, so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy and then cunningly explained the resultant blood as her being 'wet to the macs lol'.


You can get away with that as wiminz never look at their lady garden during secks :smilie4:

[manker]

Oh.
and pics plz

[mjmacky]

so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy

I implied precisely the same thing, are you pointing this out since most of what I post gets generally ignored?

[NotLettingItGo]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.


Is that not what it does then?

I honestly don't know.

[manker]

so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy

I implied precisely the same thing, are you pointing this out since most of what I post gets generally ignored?Far from it. I'm sure I speak for the rest of the people who live inside my computer when I say that we await your posts with bated breath whilst precariously perched at the very edge of our seats.

Nah, I thought priapism meant when your cawk exploded, but just before I hit alt+s, I checked it out and then had to delete the entire thing when it didn't :dabs:
Your post wasn't there when I naively started out in this thread.

[manker]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.


Is that not what it does then?

I honestly don't know.It's amphetamines for people with too much money.
Lots of running around and acting like a cawk for 45 mins and then you have to spend £50 on another gram or you go home and cry.

It's rubbish, really. Unless you snort it off a hooker's arse.
Apparently.

[NotLettingItGo]

...
It's rubbish, really. Unless you snort it off a hooker's arse.
Apparently.

We didn't do that kind of thing in my rugby club, although one or two of the props might have been up for it... if only they'd known.

[mjmacky]

I implied precisely the same thing, are you pointing this out since most of what I post gets generally ignored?Far from it. I'm sure I speak for the rest of the people who live inside my computer when I say that we await your posts with bated breath whilst precariously perched at the very edge of our seats.

Nah, I thought priapism meant when your cawk exploded, but just before I hit alt+s, I checked it out and then had to delete the entire thing when it didn't :dabs:
Your post wasn't there when I naively started out in this thread.

I should have probably paid attention to the timing of posts in that case. I guess we both see fupas when Rorschach inks out chubby. Speaking of chubby and medical conditions, maybe just rely upon Priapus when you're trying to eke out a compliment.
92878

[Squeamous]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.

in other news, mulder already shaves all of his body hair before he goes out into the world, so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy and then cunningly explained the resultant blood as her being 'wet to the macs lol'.


You can get away with that as wiminz never look at their lady garden during secks :smilie4:

:lol:

Too busy looking at the ugly cunt on top of us to be fair.

[manker]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.

in other news, mulder already shaves all of his body hair before he goes out into the world, so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy and then cunningly explained the resultant blood as her being 'wet to the macs lol'.


You can get away with that as wiminz never look at their lady garden during secks :smilie4:

:lol:

Too busy looking at the ugly cunt on top of us to be fair.I prefer the term 'badly wrapped kebab' if my sexual partner's glistening love hole isn't quite piggy-bank-slot-eque.

I'm just too polite for my own good.

[Squeamous]

I prefer the term 'badly wrapped kebab' if my sexual partner's glistening love hole isn't quite piggy-bank-slot-eque.

I'm just too polite for my own good.

You're a born romantic: the last of a dying breed :yup:

[manker]

I know, right!

Plus there's the added bonus of the lesbian implication which will have at least seven readers furiously masturbating for the rest of the morning.

[manker]

Far from it. I'm sure I speak for the rest of the people who live inside my computer when I say that we await your posts with bated breath whilst precariously perched at the very edge of our seats.

Nah, I thought priapism meant when your cawk exploded, but just before I hit alt+s, I checked it out and then had to delete the entire thing when it didn't :dabs:
Your post wasn't there when I naively started out in this thread.

I should have probably paid attention to the timing of posts in that case. I guess we both see fupas when Rorschach inks out chubby. Speaking of chubby and medical conditions, maybe just rely upon Priapus when you're trying to eke out a compliment.
92878My, my. How commendable. Etymology in the lounge.

Whoda thunk that.

[megabyteme]

I know, right!

Plus there's the added bonus of the lesbian implication which will have at least seven readers furiously masturbating for the rest of the morning.

Not only are you generous in description, but overly kind in terms of duration...

[mjmacky]

I know, right!

Plus there's the added bonus of the lesbian implication which will have at least seven readers furiously masturbating for the rest of the morning.

Not only are you generous in description, but overly kind demanding in terms of duration...

Perspective matters

[manker]

It was like 11:57 when I posted that.

merkins :dry: :schnauz:

[mjmacky]

My, my. How commendable. Etymology in the lounge.

Whoda thunk that.

Lounge need merely be interesting, right? Etymology is interesting, and anyone who disagrees can fickt off.

[megabyteme]

...
It's rubbish, really. Unless you snort it off a hooker's arse.
Apparently.

We didn't do that kind of thing in my rugby club, although one or two of the props might have been up for it... if only they'd known.

Trying to be a bit too butch, I see. NTL, doesn't it waste A LOT of coke when it get's stuck in the guy's arse hair? :unsure:

[manker]

:lol: :pinch:
I've only just got the hooker/prop connection.

And now I wish I hadn't. Eww.

[manker]

My, my. How commendable. Etymology in the lounge.

Whoda thunk that.

Lounge need merely be interesting, right? Etymology is interesting, and anyone who disagrees can fickt off.I agree, I just hadn't planned on learning anything today.

It would be a kindness if you continued using only information that you're absolutely sure I'm aware of.

[Biggles]

I want some cocaine that makes you trip.

in other news, mulder already shaves all of his body hair before he goes out into the world, so the shaving must have been of the teenage girls.
interesting :eyebrows:
He probably nicked a flap or a fupa in his coke-fuelled depilatory frenzy and then cunningly explained the resultant blood as her being 'wet to the macs lol'.


You can get away with that as wiminz never look at their lady garden during secks :smilie4:

I'm sure I found secks appealing once upon a time :huh:

[manker]

Damn. Have I put you off having secks with mulder.
He'll be furious with me :no:

[Artemis]

Damn. Have I put you off having secks with mulder.
He'll be furious with me :no:

Just Chloroform Les instead, Mulder has never been that concerned by levels of consciousness.....

[manker]

Damn. Have I put you off having secks with mulder.
He'll be furious with me :no:

Just Chloroform Les instead, Mulder has never been that concerned by levels of consciousness.....That's an excellent last resort - and it would work too - but I'm still hoping to somehow persuade Les to follow through of his own volition.

[Biggles]

Just Chloroform Les instead, Mulder has never been that concerned by levels of consciousness.....That's an excellent last resort - and it would work too - but I'm still hoping to somehow persuade Les to follow through of his own volition.

I was going to say that my age and whiskers would surely put me outside the operational ambit of Mulder


......no idea why I thought that this might be the case though :unsure:

[manker]

Me either.
He'd just shave you pre-coitus.

[Biggles]

Me either.
He'd just shave you pre-coitus.

:O My whiskers!

I think it might be wise to re-calibrate the conversation with the language of love


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuE3YexxMQg&feature=related

I know he would

[manker]

I think it might be wise to re-calibrate the conversation with the language of loveI'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:


*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

[chalice]

I think it might be wise to re-calibrate the conversation with the language of loveI'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:


*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

I'd almost forgotten subtlety until you came back.

[Quarterquack]

I'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:
*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

Still waiting on encourtening those pics, mate. It's not like you even need to zip the files.

[Biggles]

I think it might be wise to re-calibrate the conversation with the language of loveI'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:




*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

There is no encountrement (classy) on the horizon (I earnestly pray) However, I thought a distraction of the eminently "wouldable" variety might ensure that Mulder was fully grounded in his heterosexuality. I'm sure that is where he is happiest even though does like to visit surprise bum secks upon the poor lassies.

[manker]

I'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:




*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

There is no encountrement (classy) on the horizon (I earnestly pray) However, I thought a distraction of the eminently "wouldable" variety might ensure that Mulder was fully grounded in his heterosexuality. I'm sure that is where he is happiest even though does like to visit surprise bum secks upon the poor lassies.Yeah but in all fairness he does wait until after the third date before smashing their back doors in.

A true gent :smilie4:

[manker]

I'm not sure if you mean this thread or your planned encountrement* with mulder :unsure:
*I learned that word from a surprisingly eloquent homosexual. I think using it makes me appear debonair.

Still waiting on encourtening those pics, mate. It's not like you even need to zip the files.Call me Nerdy McGeekboi if you like but I'm not sure there is much benefit in compressing jpegs.

I digress. I'm stalling for time. You appear to be the romantic sort and I just want a change from monogamy induced relentless onanism.
I don't know if this will work out after all.

[Biggles]

Yeah but in all fairness he does wait until after the third date before smashing their back doors in.

A true gent :smilie4:

I've heard he reads a chapter of Geoffrey of Monmouth's edifying Historia Regum Britanniae every night.

[manker]

:lol: :lol:

In all honesty, I've no idea what that is. But I'm absolutely positive that you heard right.
He's just that kind of guy.

[mjmacky]

Still waiting on encourtening those pics, mate. It's not like you even need to zip the files.Call me Nerdy McGeekboi if you like but I'm not sure there is much benefit in compressing jpegs.

I'm feeling like you either misread his post or that I'm missing something obvious

[chalice]

Call me Nerdy McGeekboi if you like but I'm not sure there is much benefit in compressing jpegs.

I'm feeling like you either misread his post or that I'm missing something obvious

The problem is that you're just too clever for your own good. Hitler had the same deficiency and look how that turned out.

You're playing to an audience. A mostly stupid audience, I'll grant you, but it'll never work if you patronise the crowd.

You'll just get cabbages. Sometimes they're clever cabbages, but that's just fluke for the most part.

[mjmacky]

The problem is that you're just too clever for your own good. Hitler had the same deficiency and look how that turned out.

You're playing to an audience. A mostly stupid audience, I'll grant you, but it'll never work if you patronise the crowd.

You'll just get cabbages. Sometimes they're clever cabbages, but that's just fluke for the most part.

I was much more subtle when I called you Hitler.

[manker]

I took it to be badinage such that the subject of the pics meant that the file size wouldn't be large so there was no need to zip for it to be small enough to work as an attachment in a PM.

Yeah, I took a few mental leaps there.

[chalice]

Never miss a chance for a Hitler reference.

Here endeth and all that.

[chalice]

I took it to be badinage such that the subject of the pics meant that the file size wouldn't be large so there was no need to zip for it to be small enough to work as an attachment in a PM.

Yeah, I took a few mental leaps there.

I was more referring to his posting style in general, as it were, in a roundabout, non-specific, generic kinda way, like.

[manker]

I hadn't even seen your post before I made mine.
It took me liek 10 mins to type my post cos I didn't really know what I meant at the time and had to improvise.

[manker]

It's not often that the lounge moves quick enough so that you have to quote the post so that people know who you're talking to.
But that's happened to me twice today. Things may be looking up :happy:

[chalice]

It's not often that the lounge moves quick enough so that you have to quote the post so that people know who you're talking to.
But that's happened to me twice today. Things may be looking up :happy:

In all honesty, and I'm never this nice, it's largely because of yourself as catalyst.

Pretty fucking refreshing, hotshot.

[manker]

It's not often that the lounge moves quick enough so that you have to quote the post so that people know who you're talking to.
But that's happened to me twice today. Things may be looking up :happy:

In all honesty, and I'm never this nice, it's largely because of yourself as catalyst.

Pretty fucking refreshing, hotshot.N'awwhhh :wub:

I'm sure it isn't, but i'm quoting that anyway.

[Artemis]

Me either.
He'd just shave you pre-coitus.

Mulder strikes me more as a wax n rip kind of a guy rather than someone who would patiently and kindly shave you :yikes:

[Mr. Mulder]

i still can't be fucked to type it all out using words and shit but basically i did a load of drugs and smashed in a chubby teenage hairdresser, spuffed on her chebs too it was pretty awesome. then i didn't have thyme to sleep so got changed for work and she spurted shaving foam (not an ewefamisum) all over my work shirt?? i said ok, rubbed it off then went to work then when i got home from work she was thankfully gone as was the even chubbier teen my flatmate bummed. except he did her up the arse and there was so much blood!!!! and she liked it???? it looked like he'd been stabbed in the abdomen! awesome!!!!

there's other stuff too but i need to save something to tell my grandkids.


before i molest the shit out of them.



obviousment. :eyebrows:

[Mr. Mulder]

is it classed as cheating if you were a complete fucking wreck? :eyebrows:

[Alien5]

It depends what drugs and how much.

Why did he rip her arsehole?

[megabyteme]

Why did he rip her arsehole?

She was fat. Try to keep up, will you...

[mjmacky]

as was the even chubbier teen my flatmate bummed. except he did her up the arse and there was so much blood!!!! and she liked it???? it looked like he'd been stabbed in the abdomen! awesome!!!!

If she were classier, she would have told him about her diverticulosis before he moved onto the next hole.

[Squeamous]

i still can't be fucked to type it all out using words and shit but basically i did a load of drugs and smashed in a chubby teenage hairdresser, spuffed on her chebs too it was pretty awesome. then i didn't have thyme to sleep so got changed for work and she spurted shaving foam (not an ewefamisum) all over my work shirt?? i said ok, rubbed it off then went to work then when i got home from work she was thankfully gone as was the even chubbier teen my flatmate bummed. except he did her up the arse and there was so much blood!!!! and she liked it???? it looked like he'd been stabbed in the abdomen! awesome!!!!

there's other stuff too but i need to save something to tell my grandkids.


before i molest the shit out of them.



obviousment. :eyebrows:

I'm sorry, I have to know. Did you get the shaving foam out of the shirt?


is it classed as cheating if you were a complete fucking wreck? :eyebrows:

If you can't remember it it doesn't count. After all, if a tree falls in the woods and no-one is there to hear it, does it make a noise? Ah so.

[megabyteme]

Speaking of which, Sq, how was that date last night? :P

[Squeamous]

Speaking of which, Sq, how was that date last night? :P

Good. Very good. Some bullshit excuse was offered, but it was so creative I was touched. At least he cared enough to lie, you know?

[mjmacky]

At least he cared enough to lie, you know?

Cared enough about who, himself or you?

[Squeamous]

At least he cared enough to lie, you know?

Cared enough about who, himself or you?

I'm not sure he warrants that much thought tbh.

[Biggles]

Cared enough about who, himself or you?

I'm not sure he warrants that much thought tbh.

Even if it was just himself it shows a capacity to love...or something like that...maybe

[anigav]

Even if it was just himself it shows a capacityability tolove fuck...

Corrected

[Squeamous]

I'm not sure he warrants that much thought tbh.

Even if it was just himself it shows a capacity to love...or something like that...maybe

Sweetheart, you are far too nice for this world.

[manker]

You're right, you know. I've always thought it.

Big Les = FST BFG

[Squeamous]

+1