Hoi Savaloy.

[chalice]

Sausage fun to the max.

[IdolEyes787]

Stop trying to hotdog.

[Quarterquack]

Has anyone considered inviting more Mumsnet members here, then? :eyebrows:

[Artemis]

Stop trying the sausage. :ghey:

[manker]

mbm would be the one to represent the bored in that respect. I reckon he'd have quite the way with single mothers.

I ignore the feck out of them when I've got to pick my son up from school, but I bet he'd get there early just so he could have a bit of a chat :smilie4:

[Squeamous]

You've got a son? :unsure:

[manker]

Indeed. I'm as surprised as you are.
Young manlet is seven now.

[megabyteme]

mbm would be the one to represent the bored in that respect. I reckon he'd have quite the way with single mothers.

I ignore the feck out of them when I've got to pick my son up from school, but I bet he'd get there early just so he could have a bit of a chat :smilie4:

I do, I do! Actually, if there has ever been a group of women who have always liked me, it was the single moms. At first, I just assumed they beamed at any guy with part-time+ employment (as their ethnos group would dictate); however, over time I became aware it was my manly charm they were after. :01:

Now that I have kids, and am a good dad...ZOOM! Off-the-charts irresistible. :D

[manker]

mbm would be the one to represent the bored in that respect. I reckon he'd have quite the way with single mothers.

I ignore the feck out of them when I've got to pick my son up from school, but I bet he'd get there early just so he could have a bit of a chat :smilie4:

I do, I do! Actually, if there has ever been a group of women who have always liked me, it was the single moms. At first, I just assumed they beamed at any guy with part-time+ employment (as their ethnos group would dictate); however, over time I became aware it was my manly charm they were after. :01:

Now that I have kids, and am a good dad...ZOOM! Off-the-charts irresistible. :DI just somehow knew that you'd be that guy. You're just ... nice.
As for myself, I am completely disinterested in their offspring - which is all they have to talk about - and I struggle to hide this fact.

I had to wait about 20 minutes for my parents evening slot; after 10 of those minutes, I had to inform this bint that I was in no way interested in her daughter's struggle to to stop eating newspaper. The other ten minutes flew by.
Luckily, I think word has finally got around that I'm an evil child-catching accountant and now they just leave me to stare into my phone when the kids are let out late.

[Barbarossa]

I do, I do! Actually, if there has ever been a group of women who have always liked me, it was the single moms. At first, I just assumed they beamed at any guy with part-time+ employment (as their ethnos group would dictate); however, over time I became aware it was my manly charm they were after. :01:

Now that I have kids, and am a good dad...ZOOM! Off-the-charts irresistible. :DI just somehow knew that you'd be that guy. You're just ... nice.
As for myself, I am completely disinterested in their offspring - which is all they have to talk about - and I struggle to hide this fact.

I had to wait about 20 minutes for my parents evening slot; after 10 of those minutes, I had to inform this bint that I was in no way interested in her daughter's struggle to to stop eating newspaper. The other ten minutes flew by.
Luckily, I think word has finally got around that I'm an evil child-catching accountant and now they just leave me to stare into my phone when the kids are let out late.

I'm pretty much in my own zone during the awful days I have to do the school run. Sometimes people say hello, I say hello back if I hear them. I don't know who they are - all school mums tend to look the same to me..

[manker]

It's the best way to be, barbs.

I can only imagine how much effort mbm has to put in. I bet he knows their names - and their kids' names - and everything :no:

[Squeamous]

Indeed. I'm as surprised as you are.
Young manlet is seven now.

Poor little fucker :no:

[megabyteme]

I just somehow knew that you'd be that guy. You're just ... nice.

:disdainformanker:

I never said I was nice back...

And... my kids are only two, so I have yet to cavort with the unlaundered masses.

[manker]

Indeed. I'm as surprised as you are.
Young manlet is seven now.

Poor little fucker :no:
I know, I know. It's a fucked up world these days.
But fear not, I'm moulding him in my image :smilie4:

[manker]

I just somehow knew that you'd be that guy. You're just ... nice.

:disdainformanker:

I never said I was nice back...

And... my kids are only two, so I have yet to cavort with the unlaundered masses.I bet you are though. I bet you're as nice as a really nice thing.
You cuddlycandycat, you.

[Squeamous]

:disdainformanker:

I never said I was nice back...

And... my kids are only two, so I have yet to cavort with the unlaundered masses.I bet you are though. I bet you're as nice as a really nice thing.
You cuddlycandycat, you.

I agree. Ever since he rode to my rescue on his flea-ridden charger I've been privately calling him Megabyteypoos.

[NotLettingItGo]

rescue!

[megabyteme]

I bet you are though. I bet you're as nice as a really nice thing.
You cuddlycandycat, you.

I agree. Ever since he rode to my rescue on his flea-ridden charger I've been privately calling him Megabyteypoos.

@MANKER :dry:

@Squeams: :wub:

[manker]

Hoi, racist, stop discriminating against me because I have no bewbs :fist:

[Artemis]

Hoi, racist, stop discriminating against me because I have no bewbs :fist:

Eat out at McDonalds more. :blink:

[Quarterquack]

Hoi, racist, stop discriminating against me because I have no bewbs :fist:

Eat out at McDonalds more. :blink:

It's cheaper to buy a water bra.

[Squeamous]

Hahaha, bewbs open doors, FACT

[manker]

Hahaha, bewbs open doors, FACT
Are you trying to get me into pegging again :dry:

[Biggles]

Hahaha, bewbs open doors, FACT
Are you trying to get me into pegging again :dry:

Going round doors selling clothes pegs? A tad ethnic, what?

That said, Squeams was walking on people the other night. The world has become one big carnival sideshow :unsure:

[manker]

You're right, you know, she probably has gypsy blood coursing thro' her veins.
It would also explain the racism and gigantic vagina.

[Biggles]

You're right, you know, she probably has gypsy blood coursing thro' her veins.
It would also explain the racism and gigantic vagina.


....and the rose in her teeth?

[Biggles]

Starship Troopers 3 is shite - fact

Grimm was OK earlier - I think I am mostly liking that.

[manker]

You're right, you know, she probably has gypsy blood coursing thro' her veins.
It would also explain the racism and gigantic vagina.


....and the rose in her teeth?Oh. I thought she just had spinach for lunch.
One doesn't like to point that kind of thing out, these Romany types are quick to anger, you know :unsure:

[Biggles]

....and the rose in her teeth?Oh. I thought she just had spinach for lunch.
One doesn't like to point that kind of thing out, these Romany types are quick to anger, you know :unsure:


They can be vicious with the clothes pegs too ....so I have heard

[mjmacky]

Hoi, racist, stop discriminating against me because I have no bewbs :fist:

One more of these and you can be diagnosed with squeamous envy.

[manker]

Hoi, racist, stop discriminating against me because I have no bewbs :fist:

One more of these and you can be diagnosed with squeamous envy.That's the best pun I've ever read this week :happy:

[Squeamous]

Going round doors selling clothes pegs? A tad ethnic, what?

That said, Squeams was walking on people the other night. The world has become one big carnival sideshow :unsure:

That's right, I'm an angry large Romany vagina with a grubby mouth and enviable tits. Makes me sound almost interesting :unsure:

[mjmacky]

That's the best pun I've ever read this week :happy:

This is a grammar citizen's arrest, taste my taser.

[manker]

It's actually a line I nicked off Squeams.
If I'm going down, she's going down with me.

[mjmacky]

It's actually a line I nicked off Squeams.
If I'm going down, she's going down with me.

And I hate the law so Im going down with the rest of you.

[manker]

You'll have to remove a rib or two.
Can't you just be grateful for a double nosh.

[Squeamous]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

[mjmacky]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

I guess you weren't aware that misery loves company; unless you thought going down was a euphemism.

[Squeamous]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

I guess you weren't aware that misery loves company; unless you thought going down was a euphemism.

I think the 'double nosh' comment might have led me down a different path of thought.

[megabyteme]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

Denied access to your vag once again. :fist:

[mjmacky]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

Denied access to your vag once again. :fist:

And that's why you'll always be a nice boy. Real rapists will find a way with penetration, not waiting for those red tape processes to go through.

[manker]

Ok, but entry is now closed. I prefer intimate parties to large gatherings :unsure:

Denied access to your vag once again. :fist:You shouldn't have turned down the drizzling :no:

[megabyteme]

Denied access to your vag once again. :fist:You shouldn't have turned down the drizzling :no:

I seem to have found her one standard- be drizzled, or go the fuk away...

[Squeamous]

Denied access to your vag once again. :fist:

And that's why you'll always be a nice boy. Real rapists will find a way with penetration, not waiting for those red tape processes to go through.

I said no, what more of an invite does he want? :idunno:

[mjmacky]

I said no, what more of an invite does he want? :idunno:

You're too far away, rapists are usually local predators. If that's not true, then I just lack dedication.

[Squeamous]

I said no, what more of an invite does he want? :idunno:

You're too far away, rapists are usually local predators. If that's not true, then I just lack dedication.

Well we know in your case it's because I've been through puberty.

[manker]

It might be that, or it might have been the cervix story.
I just can't seem to get past it. It pops up in my mind at the most inappropriate of times.

:ermm:

[mjmacky]

Well we know in your case it's because I've been through puberty.

Well if you have the tits and ass of a 12-year-old, we can still make it work.

[Something Else]

She's not Asian.

[Squeamous]

It might be that, or it might have been the cervix story.
I just can't seem to get past it. It pops up in my mind at the most inappropriate of times.

:ermm:

Imagine how I feel, I've got to have it taken out in 4.5 years. Mind you, I guess by then I might be busted open wider than the Suez. Fingers crossed.


She's not Asian.

Or Keira Knightley :ermm:

[mjmacky]

She's not Asian.

I've already proven my ability to emulate the look with makeup effects.

[manker]

Imagine how I feel, I've got to have it taken out in 4.5 years. Mind you, I guess by then I might be busted open wider than the Suez. Fingers crossed.
If you keep bashing away, it might fall out on its own and then you could life-blog on here about mucus secretions all thro' the resultant pregnancy.

Ginger babies ftw?

[Squeamous]

Imagine how I feel, I've got to have it taken out in 4.5 years. Mind you, I guess by then I might be busted open wider than the Suez. Fingers crossed.
If you keep bashing away, it might fall out on its own and then you could life-blog on here about mucus secretions all thro' the resultant pregnancy.

Ginger babies ftw?

Are you offering me ginger babies? I thought we were friends :(

[manker]

If you keep bashing away, it might fall out on its own and then you could life-blog on here about mucus secretions all thro' the resultant pregnancy.

Ginger babies ftw?

Are you offering me ginger babies? I thought we were friends :(:lol: ofcuk it does read like that.

That guy, not the one you stamp on, the one you let touch your lady garden, has a ginger beard, rite?
He's tipped his hand early. There's still time to escape ginger baby emissions :smilie4:

[Squeamous]

Are you offering me ginger babies? I thought we were friends :(:lol: ofcuk it does read like that.

That guy, not the one you stamp on, the one you let touch your lady garden, has a ginger beard, rite?
He's tipped his hand early. There's still time to escape ginger baby emissions :smilie4:

Nooo wai!!!! He's just my special friend! He doesn't want babies. In fact, he throws a spaz attack whenever he sees one so I wouldn't even consider letting him infiltrate and colonise my womb.

Hello sweety! :wave:

[manker]

Hai there, sparkly-candy-dragon :wub:

[mjmacky]

Hai there, sparkly-candy-dragon :wub:

I may be a pervert, but at least I'm not so much of a creep to have a reptile fetish.

[manker]

cus you've never fapped to tentacle rape hentai.

[mjmacky]

cus you've never fapped to tentacle rape hentai.

I've prodded at the behest of an encephalopod.

[manker]

encephalopodFfs, I googled that word when Les used it a while back.
and now I have to do it again :sadwalk:

[Snee]

:blink:

[manker]

wut

[Snee]

It was only liek four years ago ffs.

[manker]

Well at least it happened.
I thought I'd dreamed it or sth.

Chalice's dream about Les being Barry McGuigan in red shorts refereeing a soccer match > all other Les dreams.

[Snee]

Yes, but to be fair chalice does a lot of drugs.

You just can't compete.

[manker]

I'd consider partaking just to foster my unconscious creative juices.
If I knew where to get them from anymore :mellow:

[Snee]

Ask ben. He's a hippie.