Birthday bewbs ITT.

[manker]

I just realised why you're pished; Happy Birthday, Squeams :happy:

Get even drunk'r, line up all your pressies, take a pic of them and post the pic for us all to judge and stay away from balustrades.
Lastly, ITT means in this thread, so, have at it.

[IdolEyes787]

I'm a bit confused as I was under the impression that women stopped having birthdays after 30.
Anyway Happy Birthday Squeamous you seem to be a very nice and certainly intelligent person no matter what Dave says.
Best wishes and if at all possible try not to wake up in a gutter as that is not nearly as fun in actuality as it sounds.

[mjmacky]

Also, picture of your balls.

[Artemis]

Or Dave's bawls, I figured you were the current owner since he doesn't seem to be using them these days.


:hbd: btw.

[megabyteme]

Or Dave's bawls, I figured you were the current owner since he doesn't seem to be using them these days.

:lol: I think his wife has one, and Squeams has the other. They each wear one like a BFF bracelet.

[chalice]

To end up alone
in a tomb of a room
without cigarettes
or wine--
just a lightbulb
and a potbelly,
grayhaired,
and glad to have
the room.

[manker]

Stop sullying my birthday tits thread with poetry, cawkface.

[chalice]

Stop sullying my birthday tits thread with poetry, cawkface.

She'll love it, spastic face.

[manker]

I can see it now.

Squeams, pished up, reading the title and already thinking of whipping them out cus she's a drunk burd, clicks the thread while absent-mindedly wondering if she put on a front or back fastening bra this morning - sees my carefully crafted tits or gtfo post and as she is just about to reach for the swivel-shot digi-cam her dad bought her ... sees the poem and thinks; 'eh, where did I put my snuggie, I think I'll read a Buk'.

And it was all going so well :no:

[chalice]

I can see it now.

Squeams, pished up, reading the title and already thinking of whipping them out cus she's a drunk burd, clicks the thread while absent-mindedly wondering if she put on a front or back fastening bra this morning - sees my carefully crafted tits or gtfo post and as she is just about to reach for the swivel-shot digi-cam her dad bought her ... sees the poem and thinks; 'eh, where did I put my snuggie, I think I'll read a Buk'.

And it was all going so well :no:

I must, I must improve my bust.

[mjmacky]

There was supposed to be an extra "I must" in there.

[megabyteme]

...the bigger the better, the tighter the sweater, the boys depend on us...

[Squeamous]

I just realised why you're pished; Happy Birthday, Squeams :happy:

Get even drunk'r, line up all your pressies, take a pic of them and post the pic for us all to judge and stay away from balustrades.
Lastly, ITT means in this thread, so, have at it.

Thank you sweety! I got these:

103363

I'm off to the Peak District end of the month so I needed a pair that don't leak. I shan't be heading home until Friday evening so pics of the rest of the pressies are a no go.....but I got some money and I went shopping and bought an apron, measuring jug, mixing bowl and mechanical flour sifter. I'm gonna get an MP3 dock and digital radio and some gardening stuff with the rest of my money. Plus I need to buy some paints and shizzle for the Prometheus (STNG/Voyager) garage model I got for Xmas. I also got tickets to see Bingo (Patrick Stewart play) on at the New Vic on Thursday. All in all I'm a very happy bunny :happy:

Going round the Imperial War Museum drunk was an interesting experience.


I'm a bit confused as I was under the impression that women stopped having birthdays after 30.
Anyway Happy Birthday Squeamous you seem to be a very nice and certainly intelligent person no matter what Dave says.
Best wishes and if at all possible try not to wake up in a gutter as that is not nearly as fun in actuality as it sounds.

:smilie4: Thank you!
I don't just have a birthday, I have a birthday eve, a birthday and a boxing birthday. I'm gonna milk this sucker for all it's worth.


Also, picture of your balls.

You'll have to make do with my tits, my balls are at the cleaner's:

103364



Stop sullying my birthday tits thread with poetry, cawkface.

She'll love it, spastic face.

I totally did :wub:

[manker]

Thank you sweety! I got these:

<pic of Nike Jordan Air Max>

I'm off to the Peak District end of the month so I needed a pair that don't leak. I shan't be heading home until Friday evening so pics of the rest of the pressies are a no go.....but I got some money and I went shopping and bought an apron, measuring jug, mixing bowl and mechanical flour sifter. I'm gonna get an MP3 dock and digital radio and some gardening stuff with the rest of my money. Plus I need to buy some paints and shizzle for the Prometheus (STNG/Voyager) garage model I got for Xmas. I also got tickets to see Bingo (Patrick Stewart play) on at the New Vic on Thursday. All in all I'm a very happy bunny

Going round the Imperial War Museum drunk was an interesting experience.Don't you think Patrick Stewart is a bit ghey in everything else he's been in :ermm:
You absolutely must post some pics of that garage model, I have no idea what a garage model is but it sounds fucking awesome.

I like the new daps, btw. Wear them with leggings and a vest top for that titanium three wood look.


Glad you had/are having a good time :happy:

[Squeamous]

Thank you sweety! I got these:

<pic of Nike Jordan Air Max>

I'm off to the Peak District end of the month so I needed a pair that don't leak. I shan't be heading home until Friday evening so pics of the rest of the pressies are a no go.....but I got some money and I went shopping and bought an apron, measuring jug, mixing bowl and mechanical flour sifter. I'm gonna get an MP3 dock and digital radio and some gardening stuff with the rest of my money. Plus I need to buy some paints and shizzle for the Prometheus (STNG/Voyager) garage model I got for Xmas. I also got tickets to see Bingo (Patrick Stewart play) on at the New Vic on Thursday. All in all I'm a very happy bunny

Going round the Imperial War Museum drunk was an interesting experience.Don't you think Patrick Stewart is a bit ghey in everything else he's been in :ermm:
You absolutely must post some pics of that garage model, I have no idea what a garage model is but it sounds fucking awesome.

I like the new daps, btw. Wear them with leggings and a vest top for that titanium three wood look.


Glad you had/are having a good time :happy:

Are you fucking kidding me? I got tickets to see him do A Christmas Carol a couple of years ago. It was a one man show in which he narrated and acted the whole book. Totally blew me away. In this one he's playing Shakespeare in his later years....really looking forward to it.
A garage model is a cast resin model produced in small runs for a niche market. They cost more but are better quality than the snap together kits you can buy. They're for serious modellers and fans. This is the Prometheus:

103365

It's got ablative armour, regenerative shielding, fuck loads of weapons, warp 9.9 and wait for it....a multi vector assault mode , in which it can split into 3 components each capable of warp power. It's sex in space.

And I'll have you know Scarpa are a really good brand of walking boot! I got them below cost price cos my mate works for Blacks. I've already run in them cross country and it's like running on springs :happy:

[Squeamous]

Oh....when I paint my model I'm gonna make it look MEAN not ghey like in that pic. It's gonna look like it's been in a fight.

[manker]

omfg so who will pilot which part, will the other two parts both have battle bridges and how does the separation affect the weapons payload.
You are taking pics of its construction, rite?
I've never heard of this garage modelling before but it does sound srs. I, unfortunately, wouldn't have time what with posting pish on the internets and pretending to look busy all day every day.

Also, I can only think of a couple of other things that Patrick Stewart was in. He played a gay chap in one and an old gay looking chap in another.
He's a shadow of himself when out of his leotard. Also, I don't even like it when he wears that Admiral's outfit.

[manker]

And I'll have you know Scarpa are a really good brand of walking boot! I got them below cost price cos my mate works for Blacks.I wish I knew drug dealer minions that could could get me cheap stuff :dabs:

[Squeamous]

And I'll have you know Scarpa are a really good brand of walking boot! I got them below cost price cos my mate works for Blacks.I wish I knew drug dealer minions that could could get me cheap stuff :dabs:

:lol:


omfg so who will pilot which part, will the other two parts both have battle bridges and how does the separation affect the weapons payload.
You are taking pics of its construction, rite?
I've never heard of this garage modelling before but it does sound srs. I, unfortunately, wouldn't have time what with posting pish on the internets and pretending to look busy all day every day.

Also, I can only think of a couple of other things that Patrick Stewart was in. He played a gay chap in one and an old gay looking chap in another.
He's a shadow of himself when out of his leotard. Also, I don't even like it when he wears that Admiral's outfit.

Omfg, well I'll tell you!!
The level of automation is such that it can be operated by only four people. All three sections can be operated from the main bridge, but there are also two battle bridges for direct control of each section. The battle bridges (on the middle and lower sections) are the same design as on the Defiant in Voyager (probably with fewer pipes and rocks falling down on people's heads and shit). Each of the sections has a Quantum torpedo launcher (3 in total) and each section has 6 phaser banks (18 in total). Separation allows a tactical advantage not a firepower advantage.
I will of course take pics for your delectation :happy:
Did you never hear about Stewart and Ian McKellan doing Waiting for Godot together? He gets rave reviews for whatever he's in :). I agree with you on the skirts they make him wear in Star Trek though. He looks far better in a sweaty t-shirt playing raquetball :wub:

[Funkin']

Also, picture of your balls.

I was gonna say butthole, but balls is just as good.

Happy Birthday, Squeamous

[megabyteme]

I got them below cost price cos my mate works for blacks.

Oh the indignities. :noes:

Happy B-day to the FST goddess. :wub:

[Biggles]

Happy Birthday week Squeams - trust you are still totally off your breasticles.

[Biggles]

Shirley Mulder should be in a bewbs thread?

Where is he.....married with three kids? :unsure:

[manker]

Fear not, I'm leaning on his facebewk balustrade, Les.
He's still doing exactly what you expect him to be doing (being slightly gay, lifting weights and getting pished), so he's not married.

It's just that he doesn't post here now :cry:



Edit: week Squeams, wtf? :blink:
Edit2: wee Squeams or comma malfunction or both?

[manker]

I wish I knew drug dealer minions that could could get me cheap stuff :dabs:

:lol:


omfg so who will pilot which part, will the other two parts both have battle bridges and how does the separation affect the weapons payload.
You are taking pics of its construction, rite?
I've never heard of this garage modelling before but it does sound srs. I, unfortunately, wouldn't have time what with posting pish on the internets and pretending to look busy all day every day.

Also, I can only think of a couple of other things that Patrick Stewart was in. He played a gay chap in one and an old gay looking chap in another.
He's a shadow of himself when out of his leotard. Also, I don't even like it when he wears that Admiral's outfit.

Omfg, well I'll tell you!!
The level of automation is such that it can be operated by only four people. All three sections can be operated from the main bridge, but there are also two battle bridges for direct control of each section. The battle bridges (on the middle and lower sections) are the same design as on the Defiant in Voyager (probably with fewer pipes and rocks falling down on people's heads and shit). Each of the sections has a Quantum torpedo launcher (3 in total) and each section has 6 phaser banks (18 in total). Separation allows a tactical advantage not a firepower advantage.
I will of course take pics for your delectation :happy:
Did you never hear about Stewart and Ian McKellan doing Waiting for Godot together? He gets rave reviews for whatever he's in :). I agree with you on the skirts they make him wear in Star Trek though. He looks far better in a sweaty t-shirt playing raquetball :wub:
Why four people?
And I initially took your post to mean that only four people on the whole ship could operate it, but then I realised that would be silly, what if they were all incapacitated by some space bug and the doctor/ships councillor/lowly ensign had to run the entire vessel for three quarters of an episode as happens a couple of times a season.

btw, I seem to remember when the Enterprise separated, it was much more maneuverable without the saucer section and could pwn pretty much anything. I bet that would happen with at least one of the sections of this too :smilie4:

[Snee]

I misread ' Saucer section' as 'Sausage section'.

And then I thought: But would humanity be more maneuverable without the sausage section :eyebrows:

And then I thought: Who needs drugs, when I can just skip sleeping properly.

And then I thought: tesco better fix the mobile skin soon or I'm murdering reality.

[Biggles]

Fear not, I'm leaning on his facebewk balustrade, Les.
He's still doing exactly what you expect him to be doing (being slightly gay, lifting weights and getting pished), so he's not married.

It's just that he doesn't post here now :cry:



Edit: week Squeams, wtf? :blink:
Edit2: wee Squeams or comma malfunction or both?

I expect he will return at some point to discuss bewbage.

Sorry that was Happy Birthday week, Squeams....it seemed like she was intent on stretching it out

ooooeer

[manker]

Classic Les, subtle to the end but making sure he got the butt-plug reference in.
Or was it a nod toward Squeams' gigantic cervix.

We may never know and it could hardly matter less :happy:

[manker]

I misread ' Saucer section' as 'Sausage section'.

And then I thought: But would humanity be more maneuverable without the sausage section :eyebrows:

And then I thought: Who needs drugs, when I can just skip sleeping properly.

And then I thought: tesco better fix the mobile skin soon or I'm murdering reality.Bloody Swedes with their highfalutin societal utopian ideals and myriad of portable internet devices.

I imagine RealitY is railing against you as a people and it will never be fixed.

[mjmacky]

I get the feeling this is what's really getting built in the garage

103451

Or this:

103452

but most likely this:

103453

[Artemis]

And then I thought: tesco better fix the mobile skin soon or I'm murdering reality.Bloody Swedes with their highfalutin societal utopian ideals and myriad of portable internet devices.

I imagine RealitY is railing against you as a people and it will never be fixed.

I'm nowhere near Swedenland, and I think the mobile skin is shite as well, it is both spectacularly awful and broken at the same time. He'd better fix it quick or I'm going to E.M.P. his car's E.C.U. :naughty:

[manker]

I know, Arty, it's obsence. RealitY doesn't give a fuck about you little people in the antipodies. He's after the big fish in Scandinavia.
You're just collateral damage in his war on opulence.

[Artemis]

obsence? :blink:

Did we get our wucking murds fuddled?

[mjmacky]

My guess is that obsence is the absence of obscenity, i.e. decent.

[manker]

hmmz.
Maybe I need to turn the spell-checker back on.

Looks like I spelled antipodes incorrectly too :dabs:

[mjmacky]

Looks like I spelled antipodes incorrectly too :dabs:

I honestly had no idea what the fuck you were trying to say. My first assumption was antibodies.

[manker]

Sounds like there should be an i in there though, rite?

[mjmacky]

Sounds like there should be an i in there though, rite?

I don't know, I'd have to ask a Perthian, they're the closest to my antipode.

[manker]

Actually, you should just ask me.
Following on from the google voice debacle yesterday, I've decided to be your articulation and intonation mentor.

[Squeamous]

I got them below cost price cos my mate works for blacks.

Oh the indignities. :noes:

Happy B-day to the FST goddess. :wub:

*coquettish giggle!*


I misread ' Saucer section' as 'Sausage section'.

And then I thought: But would humanity be more maneuverable without the sausage section :eyebrows:

And then I thought: Who needs drugs, when I can just skip sleeping properly.

And then I thought: tesco better fix the mobile skin soon or I'm murdering reality.

Are you referring to the fact you can't manoeuvre through the pages of a thread? If so, Tesco better fix it, or I'm going to squat behind the sofa and take a dump in the drawing room :angry:


Classic Les, subtle to the end but making sure he got the butt-plug reference in.
Or was it a nod toward Squeams' gigantic cervix.

We may never know and it could hardly matter less :happy:

It's like the tardis in there. Both of them :happy:

Thank you Biggles! I'm not still drunk sadly, I had to go back to work yesterday. I intend on spending the rest of the week getting rancidly drunk though. I'm going to Club de Fromage on Saturday night, and I'm forcing everyone going to dress up as extras from the LMFAO Party Rock anthem video. It's going to be rofflemayo-tastic :smilie4:


I get the feeling this is what's really getting built in the garage



Garage? We're not all one of the bourgeoise :huh:

[Squeamous]

Actually, you should just ask me.
Following on from the google voice debacle yesterday, I've decided to be your articulation and intonation mentor.

Fuck off, you're Welsh! That's like the deaf, dumb and blind leading the blind and autistic.

[manker]

:snooty:
I'd post a voice clip but I'm pretending to be working.
Wouldn't care normally but I got the missus to come in for cawfee duties and she doesn't know about you people who live inside my computer.

[Squeamous]

Well why don't you disguise the clip as a comment to her? Something along the lines of 'darling, I'm a dipshit and I'm so grateful you let me poon you' shouldn't be too conspicuous.

[Artemis]

Looks like I spelled antipodes incorrectly too :dabs:

I honestly had no idea what the fuck you were trying to say. My first assumption was antibodies.

Antipodes= quaint british name for New Zealand since it is GMT+12 and almost exactly opposite the U.K.

On a sidenote: why me no get quoted :cry: I feel so neglected Squeamous, like the milk that got left out in the sun and now nobody wants to go near it because it might be off.

[mjmacky]

Actually, you should just ask me.

You? The guy who doesn't know how to stop his local redirect?

[mjmacky]

Actually, you should just ask me.
Following on from the google voice debacle yesterday, I've decided to be your articulation and intonation mentor.

Fuck off, you're Welsh! That's like the deaf, dumb and blind leading the blind and autistic.

I heard they speak even funnier than the rest of you kingdomers. Leading them where? If it's to the edge of a cliff, I'd happily accept his assistance.

[Squeamous]

Fuck off, you're Welsh! That's like the deaf, dumb and blind leading the blind and autistic.

I heard they speak even funnier than the rest of you kingdomers. Leading them where? If it's to the edge of a cliff, I'd happily accept his assistance.

Poor Macky :emo:

Why don't you wrap up all your problems with brown paper in a box and leave it outside your front door? Sayonara problems.

[mjmacky]

I heard they speak even funnier than the rest of you kingdomers. Leading them where? If it's to the edge of a cliff, I'd happily accept his assistance.

Poor Macky :emo:

Why don't you wrap up all your problems with brown paper in a box and leave it outside your front door? Sayonara problems.

You have it all backwards, as I'm sure I would have been led to the safest ground.

[manker]

Well why don't you disguise the clip as a comment to her? Something along the lines of 'darling, I'm a dipshit and I'm so grateful you let me poon you' shouldn't be too conspicuous.It's too risky.
She might catch me being inadvertently amusing and also expect to be regaled with joviality or something equally unlikely.

[manker]

I honestly had no idea what the fuck you were trying to say. My first assumption was antibodies.

Antipodes= quaint british name for New Zealand since it is GMT+12 and almost exactly opposite the U.K.

On a sidenote: why me no get quoted :cry: I feel so neglected Squeamous, like the milk that got left out in the sun and now nobody wants to go near it because it might be off.She's uber-h4r5h, mate.
It's times like this when you realise just how right about everything Magnum Dave actually was :smilie4:

[manker]

Actually, you should just ask me.

You? The guy who doesn't know how to stop his local redirect?Why should I have wanted to in that instance.
Everything sounds better with a Welsh accent and leads me to precisely why I am now in charge of your elocution.

[Squeamous]

Antipodes= quaint british name for New Zealand since it is GMT+12 and almost exactly opposite the U.K.

On a sidenote: why me no get quoted :cry: I feel so neglected Squeamous, like the milk that got left out in the sun and now nobody wants to go near it because it might be off.She's uber-h4r5h, mate.
It's times like this when you realise just how right about everything Magnum Dave actually was :smilie4:

Sorry Arty, I didn't see you there :hug:

You may have a point Manky, I did get this card for my birthday :unsure:
103562

[mjmacky]

Why should I have wanted to in that instance.
Everything sounds better with a Welsh accent and leads me to precisely why I am now in charge of your elocution.

I have no localized accent (north or south) and I plan to keep it that way. I can however fake a variety of them, pretty decently too.

[mjmacky]

Alright manker, let's start with this one. Let me know how to do it without sounding like I'm an insecure 14 yo wearing a retainer.

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

[manker]

My mam can say that, I can't without sounding like a fuckspastic :emo:
You have to, like, sing it for it to sound right.

I'll try later after I've played footie.

===

Awesome card, btw, Squeams :happy:

[Artemis]

Alright manker, let's start with this one. Let me know how to do it without sounding like I'm an insecure 14 yo wearing a retainer.

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

I always remember a quote from Series 3 of blackadder regarding Welsh place names:

'Never ask for directions in Wales Baldrick, you'll be wiping spittle off your face for the next two weeks'.

[Artemis]

...hilarious birthday card


:glag:

[Biggles]

Alright manker, let's start with this one. Let me know how to do it without sounding like I'm an insecure 14 yo wearing a retainer.

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

That is just uber Cymru harshness to make the English give up all hope. We take a different approach and chop it up like this Rubha na h-Aoidhe so their larynx goes into spasm. Cramp of the tonsils is, apparently, very painful.

We only do it because of neighbourly jestfulness tho :unsure:

[mjmacky]

Alright manker, let's start with this one. Let me know how to do it without sounding like I'm an insecure 14 yo wearing a retainer.

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

That is just uber Cymru harshness to make the English give up all hope. We take a different approach and chop it up like this Rubha na h-Aoidhe so their larynx goes into spasm. Cramp of the tonsils is, apparently, very painful.

We only do it because of neighbourly jestfulness tho :unsure:

Fine, then I want to say this:
Llan Fair pwll gwyn gyll go ger y chwyrn drobwll Llantysilio g ogo goch

[Biggles]

That is just uber Cymru harshness to make the English give up all hope. We take a different approach and chop it up like this Rubha na h-Aoidhe so their larynx goes into spasm. Cramp of the tonsils is, apparently, very painful.

We only do it because of neighbourly jestfulness tho :unsure:

Fine, then I want to say this:
Llan Fair pwll gwyn gyll go ger y chwyrn drobwll Llantysilio g ogo goch


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SoIpkmSipuk

[Squeamous]

That is just uber Cymru harshness to make the English give up all hope. We take a different approach and chop it up like this Rubha na h-Aoidhe so their larynx goes into spasm. Cramp of the tonsils is, apparently, very painful.

We only do it because of neighbourly jestfulness tho :unsure:

To be fair the English do a similar thing to you guise. When we want to confuse you we use words like 'Decent life expectancy' and 'healthy BMI'

[Biggles]

That is just uber Cymru harshness to make the English give up all hope. We take a different approach and chop it up like this Rubha na h-Aoidhe so their larynx goes into spasm. Cramp of the tonsils is, apparently, very painful.

We only do it because of neighbourly jestfulness tho :unsure:

To be fair the English do a similar thing to you guise. When we want to confuse you we use words like 'Decent life expectancy' and 'healthy BMI'

We are just astutely ensuring we do not have a huge pension liability :snooty:

[Squeamous]

:smilie4: