I had a better morning than Mary

[Squeamous]

I woke up feeling fully refreshed from a beautiful, idyllic fantastical dream of epic proportions!

In my dream were a hoard of hot, topless men, each vying to make me breakfast. I was all like 'dewds, I'm hungry, I can take everything you have to give, don't fight!' and they were all like 'Grrr *jostle* *flex*'
One in particular took my fancy, and I recall vividly sitting on his lap and feeling his muscles, and he was nibbling my ear and neck and saying FILTHY things to me that would make you ladies blush, but not I, because I'm made of sterner stuff than that :happy:.
Anyway, I couldn't sit there all day wriggling around on hot guy's lap and giggling coquettishly because I suddenly remembered I had to go Go-karting! Next thing I know I'm zooming along country roads and beaches so fast the kart is almost shaking itself apart. I zoom past 3 lads, one of whom is freckly and ginger, and we race and I win!! At first I worry about not having any brakes but then some appear and I come to a slow, gentle stop and at that point wake up.

How orsom is that! :w00t:

[IdolEyes787]

Not to judge but the first part seems more like a nightmare to me.:mellow:

[Biggles]

Not to judge but the first part seems more like a nightmare to me.:mellow:

Frankly?

Utterly terrifying :fear:

[Squeamous]

Poofs!

[Biggles]

Poofs!


Ha! Look who is talking - you were the one dreaming of scantily clad men.

[manker]

I wouldn't mind if a herd of hot men wanted to make me breakfast.
I'd think of them as robots and sample their wares regardless of their wanton advances.

I draw the line at go-karting though, that's almost as poofy as paintballing :ghey:

[Biggles]

I wouldn't mind if a herd of hot men wanted to make me breakfast.
I'd think of them as robots and sample their wares regardless of their wanton advances.

I draw the line at go-karting though, that's almost as poofy as paintballing :ghey:

Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.

[manker]

I wouldn't mind if a herd of hot men wanted to make me breakfast.
I'd think of them as robots and sample their wares regardless of their wanton advances.

I draw the line at go-karting though, that's almost as poofy as paintballing :ghey:

Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.
That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

[Biggles]

Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.
That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

:snooty: This was the early 1970s...we were mainly only smoking weed back then and petrol was 7p a litre

[Quarterquack]

Considering that it's been shown that the human mind cannot construct faces, you actually have met every man you fondled in your dream.

Also, I'm sure the dream part is the only lie you told.

[Squeamous]

Poofs!


Ha! Look who is talking - you were the one dreaming of scantily clad men.

Homophobe.
:ermm:





Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.
That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

I don't share my scantily clad men Manky.

Or my Go-Karts Bigglywigglypoowoo.

So kindly get back in your boxes and stop ruining what was without doubt the best dream there ever was :snooty:

[Squeamous]

Considering that it's been shown that the human mind cannot construct faces, you actually have met every man you fondled in your dream.

Also, I'm sure the dream part is the only lie you told.

I only fondled one, and you're right, I do know him. Not as well as I'd like but my life is still young so you never know :naughty:

Also, I'm not quite sure what you mean.

[Biggles]

Ha! Look who is talking - you were the one dreaming of scantily clad men.

Homophobe.
:ermm:





Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.
That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

I don't share my scantily clad men Manky.

Or my Go-Karts Bigglywigglypoowoo.

So kindly get back in your boxes and stop ruining what was without doubt the best dream there ever was :snooty:

We were merely exploring the recesses of your mind and knickerdrawer (when you weren't looking)....it is a psychoanalysis thing. Trust us we are doctors.

[Squeamous]

Homophobe.
:ermm:





Never tried paintballing it does look :ghey: - tried go-karting at a youth club convention when I was 15 and got banned, our whole club were banned come to think of it. We lived in the back of beyond where police were thin on the ground and we all had (fairly ancient) cars and motor bikes and things. We pushed those karts to the limit...one caught fire a couple crashed and we got booted after only a few laps. It was an injustice. Head of the Youth Club whatever it was mentioned it in his final rally speech, called it jolly high jinks.....:dabs: I think go karting would be OK if the engines were a decent size and you didn't get banned if they catch fire.
That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

I don't share my scantily clad men Manky.

Or my Go-Karts Bigglywigglypoowoo.

So kindly get back in your boxes and stop ruining what was without doubt the best dream there ever was :snooty:

We were merely exploring the recesses of your mind and knickerdrawer (when you weren't looking)....it is a psychoanalysis thing. Trust us we are doctors.

Zomg, you're like, Jung and Freud and I'm Keira Knightley's nipples!!!

[Biggles]

Homophobe.
:ermm:


That sounds a lot like what Grease would have been if it had been written by Irvine Welsh - but with slightly less heroin and aids.

I imagine you as Kenickie.

I don't share my scantily clad men Manky.

Or my Go-Karts Bigglywigglypoowoo.

So kindly get back in your boxes and stop ruining what was without doubt the best dream there ever was :snooty:

We were merely exploring the recesses of your mind and knickerdrawer (when you weren't looking)....it is a psychoanalysis thing. Trust us we are doctors.

Zomg, you're like, Jung and Freud and I'm Keira Knightley's nipples!!![/QUOTE]

I haven't seen that film - were her nipples in Oscar form?

[Squeamous]

I haven't seen that film - were her nipples in Oscar form?

Mary put a still from Dangerous Minds up. Repeatedly :ermm:. They were, shall we say, scene stealers.

[Biggles]

I haven't seen that film - were her nipples in Oscar form?

Mary put a still from Dangerous Minds up. Repeatedly :ermm:. They were, shall we say, scene stealers.

Isn't Keira a bit old for Mary and a bit too...well, female?

[manker]

Yeah. I'm completely lost now.

[Squeamous]

Isn't Keira a bit old for Mary and a bit too...well, female?

Spanking and nipples make up for her obvious shortcomings I think :unsure:


Yeah. I'm completely lost now.

I am the only one of us completely up to sped with this fred? I think this is the first time ever that I've been ahead of the mental curve :happy:

[Biggles]

Spanking and nipples make up for her obvious shortcomings I think :unsure:



Fair do's to Mary that seems a reasonable shout. Of course if we are Jung and Freud and you are being Keira's nipples then I'm afraid we will have no option but to chastise you.

[manker]

Isn't Keira a bit old for Mary and a bit too...well, female?

Spanking and nipples make up for her obvious shortcomings I think :unsure:


Yeah. I'm completely lost now.

I am the only one of us completely up to sped with this fred? I think this is the first time ever that I've been ahead of the mental curve :happy:
But not the first time you've given head to a mental.
...

Kinda tenuous but I awarded myself a badum-tish on my imaginary drum kit :happy:

[Biggles]

Spanking and nipples make up for her obvious shortcomings I think :unsure:


Yeah. I'm completely lost now.

I am the only one of us completely up to sped with this fred? I think this is the first time ever that I've been ahead of the mental curve :happy:
But not the first time you've given head to a mental.
...

Kinda tenuous but I awarded myself a badum-tish on my imaginary drum kit :happy:

On these many strange thoughts I shall take myself off to bed perchance to dream...(probably If formulae..but who knows)

[Squeamous]

Fair do's to Mary that seems a reasonable shout. Of course if we are Jung and Freud and you are being Keira's nipples then I'm afraid we will have no option but to chastise you.

:w00t:




But not the first time you've given head to a mental.
...

Kinda tenuous but I awarded myself a badum-tish on my imaginary drum kit :happy:

Oh Manky :no:

[manker]

hmmz.

After I wrote that, I literally did a 'badum-tish' on an imaginary drum kit.
Is there any way possible to do the 'tish' part without looking gay?

---

Night, Les.

[Squeamous]

Night Lez!


hmmz.

After I wrote that, I literally did a 'badum-tish' on an imaginary drum kit.
Is there any way possible to do the 'tish' part without looking gay?

---

Night, Les.

I think possibly if you imagine you're Dave Grohl hammering the shit out of a drum kit you can't go far wrong. He makes Jack Nicholson look like a prancing, neurotic mess :wub:

[Squeamous]

Oh gosh, I wonder if I'll dream of Dave Grohl tonight? :D

[manker]

I'd kinda forgotten he used to play drums.
That didn't work, btw. Even the moustachioed uber-cool mister grohl couldn't hit the cymbals once without looking a bit bent.

[IdolEyes787]

I'd kinda forgotten he used to play drums.
That didn't work, btw. Even the moustachioed uber-cool mister grohl couldn't hit the cymbals once without looking a bit bent.

I watched this documentary on Foo Fighters (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1853563/)and he's really a controlling jerk.First album they hire a drummer and then Grohl won't let him play on the some of the songs because he(Grohl) feels he can do it better.:mellow:

[manker]

Sounds kinda okay and not all that controlling to me but he should have hired Josh Freese.
Him > Grohl

Is there anything you haven't watched except The Vampire Diaries, btw?

[IdolEyes787]

Louie.

[Quarterquack]

Louie.

:lol:

[manker]

:o Movieworld in-jokes.

[mjmacky]

:o Movieworld in-jokes.

More running gag than in-joke.

[mjmacky]

I woke up feeling fully refreshed from a beautiful, idyllic fantastical dream of epic proportions!

In my dream were a hoard of hot, topless men, each vying to make me breakfast. I was all like 'dewds, I'm hungry, I can take everything you have to give, don't fight!' and they were all like 'Grrr *jostle* *flex*'
One in particular took my fancy, and I recall vividly sitting on his lap and feeling his muscles, and he was nibbling my ear and neck and saying FILTHY things to me that would make you ladies blush, but not I, because I'm made of sterner stuff than that :happy:.
Anyway, I couldn't sit there all day wriggling around on hot guy's lap and giggling coquettishly because I suddenly remembered I had to go Go-karting! Next thing I know I'm zooming along country roads and beaches so fast the kart is almost shaking itself apart. I zoom past 3 lads, one of whom is freckly and ginger, and we race and I win!! At first I worry about not having any brakes but then some appear and I come to a slow, gentle stop and at that point wake up.

How orsom is that! :w00t:

I had the pretty much the same dream, with only these key differences:
-They only served salami for breakfast. I'm real finicky with salami, I can barely tolerate it on Cubans.
-The ginger won the race

Suffice it to say, it was the reason my day went poorly.

[Squeamous]

I'd kinda forgotten he used to play drums.
That didn't work, btw. Even the moustachioed uber-cool mister grohl couldn't hit the cymbals once without looking a bit bent.

Ok, well stop laughing at your own jokes then. I'm afraid I don't know what else to suggest :console:



I'd kinda forgotten he used to play drums.
That didn't work, btw. Even the moustachioed uber-cool mister grohl couldn't hit the cymbals once without looking a bit bent.

I watched this documentary on Foo Fighters (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1853563/)and he's really a controlling jerk.First album they hire a drummer and then Grohl won't let him play on the some of the songs because he(Grohl) feels he can do it better.:mellow:

I'm with Manky, that kinda sounds ok. But in my experience I usually adopt the opposite approach. As the most experienced member of my unit I force my underlings to do stuff until they're as good as me at it. If Grohl thinks his drummer isn't as good at drumming as him he should make him play on every song they record until he's proficient. Then he can put him forward for an assessment related pay rise during his performance development review process. That's what I would do :mellow:



I had the pretty much the same dream, with only these key differences:
-They only served salami for breakfast. I'm real finicky with salami, I can barely tolerate it on Cubans.
-The ginger won the race

Suffice it to say, it was the reason my day went poorly.

:console:

And suffice it to say I didn't dream of Dave Grohl last night either. I dreamt I was renting out a room of my flat to a couple who were really nice, but then all of a sudden the dream took a turn for the vomitous when I realised I was in a relationship with an old fat man who looked like the security guy at work. And he was feeling frisky. I woke up to the sound of my phone running out of battery so had to get up to get the landline phone and set the alarm on that at 6am, after which I totes failed to get back to sleep :ermm:

[IdolEyes787]

Re: Grohl.You really need to watch the documentary to get the full impact.Basically the whole thing is about how FF regularly implode because Grohl needs total control.
Anyway is he justified in wanting to put out what he feels is the product possible?Of course he is but it's still a band not a solo act and therefore some compromise basically goes with the territory.
Also why hire the guy if you don't think that he can do the job?

[manker]

In all fairness, Dave Grohl is the Foo Fighters.
Any other band member is completely interchangeable. It's Dave's ball and he can take it home whenever he likes, 'cus they can't play without him.

In fact, after Pat Smear left, it practically became a solo act again, just like it was when he started it up.
The rest of the members are non-charismatic, stock-musician fluff.

I think it remains a group only because a band premise is easier to sell than a male punk/rock solo act.

[mjmacky]

Ok, well stop laughing at your own jokes then. I'm afraid I don't know what else to suggest :console:

In his quest to understand and bring under control the abyss, the abyss infects him with a virus like organism that slowly causes him to adopt the ways of the abyss.

[mjmacky]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Co0Sqhh17hM

[manker]

Ok, well stop laughing at your own jokes then. I'm afraid I don't know what else to suggest :console:

In his quest to understand and bring under control the abyss, the abyss infects him with a virus like organism that slowly causes him to adopt the ways of the abyss.
Stop calling Dave an abyss or I'll shoot you in the face.

[mjmacky]

I am the abyss, and why do so many want to shoot my beautiful face?

[manker]

You answered your own question, you smoothly tonsured Asian you.
It's also cute when it drips off of your reading glasses.

[mjmacky]

You answered your own question, you smoothly tonsured Asian you.
It's also cute when it drips off of your reading glasses.

There are so many inconsistencies there, looks like the effects I've had on you are much more profound than previously perceived.

[Squeamous]

In all fairness, Dave Grohl is the Foo Fighters.
Any other band member is completely interchangeable. It's Dave's ball and he can take it home whenever he likes, 'cus they can't play without him.

In fact, after Pat Smear left, it practically became a solo act again, just like it was when he started it up.
The rest of the members are non-charismatic, stock-musician fluff.

I think it remains a group only because a band premise is easier to sell than a male punk/rock solo act.

'zackly.


I am the abyss, and why do so many want to shoot my beautiful face?

Because you're an arrogant cunt?

[mjmacky]

cunt?

I only pretend to be a cunt, that much is obvious.

[IdolEyes787]

cunt?

I only pretend to be a cunt, that much is obvious.

I only pretend to like you.:idunno:

[mjmacky]

I only pretend to be a cunt, that much is obvious.

I only pretend to like you.:idunno:

You really suck at pretending.

[Quarterquack]

Because you're an arrogant cunt?


Nothing wrong with arrogance; unless you're a pathetic macho divvy who never admits he's wrong.

So unless Squeams' line was supposed to be a plurality of things she has no problems with, but decided to ascribe as properties to Macky, we're currently supposed to assume that he's a pathetic macho divvy cunt, who never admits he's wrong.

Sounds about right.

[mjmacky]

Never admitting wrong is one of the perks of always being right. I'm uncertain as to what a divvy is, still haven't been given an interest to investigate.

[Squeamous]

Nothing wrong with arrogance; unless you're a pathetic macho divvy who never admits he's wrong.

So unless Squeams' line was supposed to be a plurality of things she has no problems with, but decided to ascribe as properties to Macky, we're currently supposed to assume that he's a pathetic macho divvy cunt, who never admits he's wrong.

Sounds about right.

Actually I was humorously responding to what I thought was a topical reference to one Samantha Brick:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124246/Samantha-Brick-downsides-looking-pretty-Why-women-hate-beautiful.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

So none of those things.
Interesting that I bother you this much though. Very interesting :smilie4:

[mjmacky]

Actually I was humorously responding to what I thought was a topical reference to one Samantha Brick:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124246/Samantha-Brick-downsides-looking-pretty-Why-women-hate-beautiful.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

So none of those things.
Interesting that I bother you this much though. Very interesting :smilie4:

That's a rather long passage, is it a parody or something?

[Squeamous]

Actually I was humorously responding to what I thought was a topical reference to one Samantha Brick:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124246/Samantha-Brick-downsides-looking-pretty-Why-women-hate-beautiful.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

So none of those things.
Interesting that I bother you this much though. Very interesting :smilie4:

That's a rather long passage, is it a parody or something?

No, this is a parody:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/04/samantha-brick-hated-good-looks?fb=native&CMP=FBCNETTXT9038

[mjmacky]

That's a rather long passage, is it a parody or something?

No, this is a parody:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/04/samantha-brick-hated-good-looks?fb=native&CMP=FBCNETTXT9038

That was just the right length and way more worth the read.