Ask A Stupid Question, Get A Stupid Answer

[bigboab]

if you fly fish in this area you are done for poaching

if Eskimos call their houses igloos what do they call the toilets?

[Gribley]

if Eskimos call their houses igloos what do they call the toilets?

Very handy, or maybe just a fishing hole afterwards

Does bait ever get it`s own back?

[bigboab]

only if it pees against the wind

if you ask for a dozen rolls in a bakers why don't you get thirteen?

[Gribley]

Well there are budget cuts which do affect dough.... maybe on a Friday you could get a 13 batch but then you`d be chopped up with a chainsaw

Should we worship our desktop icons? My recycle bin one rates high but I`ve not committed yet

[bigboab]

where do you get them from? you should always be aware of geeks bearing gifs

does the winner of a one horse race get all the prize money?

[Gribley]

Depends if it makes it to the finish line I guess.

When you can`t grow facial hair does it make it OK to put McDonald's trays under your rear wheels with hand-break on and spin out down at your local super market carpark? Come on you know you`ve tried it before being 30 years the wiser :)

[bigboab]

I was born with facial hair, I have, however, turned a car over when I was in my teens. no McDonalds in sight.

if a teenager comes out in spots is he gradually becoming gay?

[Gribley]

Hey they can come out any way they like as this is the 21st century but Clearasil clearly hates them.

Would plastic surgery help Morph?
174654

I add picture as only old UK people would get the reference :D

[bigboab]

Plasticine surgery? I understand.:)

on the same subject would Morph creep up some walls? He would if he was aye screaming. Walls, ice cream, forget it.:cry:

[Gribley]

Shite, not sure where to go with that one (missing ref between Tony Hart and Ice cream I think).... yes he would if you throw him high enough :S


Do insects keep out of the rain under mushrooms?

[thepished05]

:glag:

[bigboab]

yes unless the mushrooms are being fried for dinner. too much at steak then.

why do they put Easter eggs in boxes? the corners of the boxes stop them rolling. :cry:

[Gribley]

It is an EU policy to stop the abuse of innocent unborn (by definition) chocolate embryos. Shame on you for trying to roll them, it is not like they are chocolate logs.

Do my video delta frames all contain Chuck Norris?

[bigboab]

there is only one frame, that is Chuck Norris

in the electricity stores how many meters are in a metre?

[Gribley]

All down to Mr. Farah, many Pico Farahs at least but you may have some impedance


Why do relays want to bounce (we are digging up my early years now :))



...and well done on the Chuck Delta Force link, I thought it was obscure but you are on my odd wave length :)

[bigboab]

impedance or impudence?

relays bounce because they don't repair the potholes correctly.

why do dogs bury a bone, is it because we bury bones?

[Gribley]

Dogs are saving for a hike in Marrowbone Jelly prices. We just do it because we killed the broker selling Marrowbone Jelly to keep the dogs down


Is a super nova better than a nova? I've had Vauxhall cars over the years and not sure that can be true.

[bigboab]

a super nova has a satnav

why does grass keep growing, just to get cut down again?

[Gribley]

It is reaching for the heavens and enlightenment, never going to get there but the struggle makes `em happy (suckers)

Where do the fairies live if you don`t have a garden?

[bigboab]

a local pub caters for them, there they will grant all your wishes, so I hear.:rolleyes:


where would we go if they closed all the shops?

[Gribley]

The Amazon



Do electron shells hatch into electron chickens?

[bigboab]

only if they know why they crossed the Rhode(island Red)

why don't we win more medal at diving when all those forwards are available?

[Gribley]

They can dive well but it is all about the style and technical points


Do rocking chairs like classical?

[bigboab]

yes you sit in one when you start listening to highbrow music

do automatic cars need passengers?

[Gribley]

Only if they want to use the car share lane


When roads lead to nowhere is there a really big car park at the end?

[bigboab]

it is like a Saturday morning, nowhere to park


is it true the only thing a politician stands for is an election?

[Gribley]

I think it makes it easier to drink coffee in the upright position

Does a spot light only work if you have acne?





I`m just making `em up, Bob - you are hard to compete against but is fun you old fart :) keep `em going.

[bigboab]

only if the doc tells you to apply a light application of cream

why is there not a traffic jam at stop signs. there is no sign to tell you to continue.:unsure:

[Gribley]

We all preserve the right when it comes to jams

Is a 360% turn an O turn or is it 2x a U?

[bigboab]

depends if you have the correct degrees

is a protractor just for a professional farmer?

[Gribley]

If they angle it correctly they can make it all the way to an enterprise tractor

Do black holes come in other colours?

[bigboab]

do you mean is there various colours of holes


once you reach warp factor do you need to iron out the warp

[Gribley]

Not unless the nay cells our out of alignment


Where do all the waves dissipate to?

[bigboab]

they stay on the shore when the tide is coming in they go back out to sea when the tide is going out. I blame the moon

where should we go to see houses on stilts?

[Gribley]

Acrobatland ((C) Adobe). It is a place that all circus folk go on holiday to. Mimes are banned I believe although balloon artists with appropriate visa are allowed


If you fly inverted who is the wrong way up, the plane or the ground?

[bigboab]

the pilot, the rest is immatreacle


are acrobats constipated when they need to take summer salts?

[Gribley]

A timely expel, just at the right moment, may well take them to gold (or at least brown)

If you had a 'light' lunch does that make your poo float?

[bigboab]

no but you may need to go to the doctor to find out watts wrong

if you have fluid on the brain will a tap on the head cure it?

[Gribley]

will not cure but draught is cheaper than bottled so you`ll feel less bad in the wallet

Is the font of all knowledge Aerial or Courier?

[bigboab]

depends on what type you are

are the public caged or the animals caged at the zoo?

[Gribley]

But are we all in a zoo already, so the animal zoo is just a concept for us humans when we are actually being observed in our own little galaxy fishtank. I blame E.T. and the speak and spell corporation for not knowing how to spell colour

If a lightwave was Mexican would it jump up 'n' down in the seat?

[bigboab]

it would need a tidal wave to move a Mexican


does a hose pipe ban play Handel's water music

[Gribley]

No but my tap does however prefer some soft rock.

If you tap a conversation and leak the information do you need a legal plumber?

[bigboab]

not if you flood the papers with fake news

if an electrician gives you a shocking bill has he failed?

[Gribley]

If the amplitude of the bill was low enough it`ll just burn a bit but you`ll get over it.

Why are radioactive particles given a half life, is it because we generally can`t x2 to work out when they really die?

[bigboab]

50% of us are given a half life, the other half tell us what to do.

who collected all the animals for Noah?

[Gribley]

Was not so much the collection but those that managed to pass customs

Do golf balls like it in the rough or prefer to be sunk?

[bigboab]

I don't like golf balls, I cant dance.

are they called caddies because of tees?

[Gribley]

I`ve watched Caddyshack (therefore an expert) and there was no tea just TNT

When my grass grows over 3" long is it an illegal blade (UK thing)?

[bigboab]

you will need to go on a corridor train to smoke it

is the grate wall of china made of cheese?

[Gribley]

Only if the breaches were made in Switzerland

Should I increase my house insurance due to my kitchen having a sinkhole?

[bigboab]

no, they will knife you in the back and you will be forced to fork up

will my vote make any difference if I write none of the above?

[Gribley]

They`ll just take the one below anyway

If you throw a coin into a gravity well do you get a wish or certain death for being far too close?

[bigboab]

you are supposed to let it go


if you lose a lot of weight where does it go?

[dion09529]

Into another being's body.

Why fat guys are considered impotent?

[megabyteme]

Yer mum's vast experience is still not sufficient to make such a conclusion.

When you wish upon a star, how many years does it take for that wish to reach the star?

[dion09529]

Yer mum's vast experience is still not sufficient to make such a conclusion.

When you wish upon a star, how many years does it take for that wish to reach the star?


Haters always find a way to hate!

The correct answer is:
"When the watermelon is baked, the haulm dries out!"

[IdolEyes787]

Yer mum's vast experience is still not sufficient to make such a conclusion.

When you wish upon a star, how many years does it take for that wish to reach the star?


Haters always find a way to hate!

The correct answer is:
"When the watermelon is baked, the haulm dries out!"

If haters didn't hate wouldn't they be called something else?

[megabyteme]

Yer mum's vast experience is still not sufficient to make such a conclusion.

When you wish upon a star, how many years does it take for that wish to reach the star?


Haters always find a way to hate!


I don't hate yer mum-- I think she provides a much-needed service to the obese, sickly, elderly, and homeless at far below market rates.

[Gribley]

There was no question so here is an equal answer:


Q: If I mount my big TV on the wall can I make at least a 14" offspring for table top use?

[dion09529]

No one has ever tried this before so it is your responsibility to manage this large-scale project.

What time did you wake up three Saturdays ago and why?

[bigboab]

5.30 a.m. to see if I was still alive


why do we drive on a particular side of the road?

[Gribley]

As cars only work when on top of the road surface

Why don`t chickens with boneless breasts keep collapsing?

[bigboab]

they use the new uplifting bras


why did the chicken cross the Rhode?

[Gribley]

To get to the other-side of the causeway

When you roast a chicken will it give up any useful intel?

[shaina]

Only if you stop the rotisserie to let her cluck

Better..

When you roast a chicken will it appreciate the humor? :drummer:

[bigboab]

chickens have no sense of humour otherwise they would stop crossing the road

where do crusaders go on their day off?

[dion09529]

To Walmart renewing their armor.

What will happen if we send a robotic probe in a black hole?

[nQQ]

The patient will remember when it was done by a doctor and his finger and be thankful technology moves on

Why has this year gone a lot quicker than the last one

[dion09529]

The fishes ate the tail.

How many times are you flushing the toilet while/after poop?

[Gribley]

I don`t know Poop well enough to flush anything even once for him

Why don`t trees and plants just grow sideways to save vital expenditure with all the 'up' nonsense?

[nQQ]

Due to potential real estate values and the inflation rate for the exchange of leaves, a smaller footprint on the ground works best (especially because the authorities don't know about the whole underground expansion system, shhhh).

Why do the wheels on the bus go round and round?

[Gribley]

Helps to flatten those f*ing bikers...

Is the Sun unfashionable for having flares?

[nQQ]

It distracts everyone from looking at the spots

What does electricity taste like?

[dion09529]

I will tell you when God will thunder me in the throat.

Which is the chemical formula of thiophene (no google)?

[Gribley]

Which is the chemical formula of thiophene (no google)?
The correct one you`d hope or it would be upset


Can flying fish get airmiles?

[tara]

Can flying fish get airmiles?
Only after they get together and form a corporation.

What am I hungry for right now?

[Gribley]

Hippos (hungry hungry I hope)

Are Sun flares only fashionable in the 60's?

[dion09529]

Since when Sun flares became a trend?

Why "k" stands for thousand?

[emraeshine]

Because "k" needed to have some purpose in this existence.

What happens after we die?

[PMG7]

You get tax-free status.

why is water wet?

[Gregg987]

Only the water which the Royal Navy has traversed is not wet.

Why are wholes holy?

[dion09529]

Cuz all wholes are assholes.

Have you ever seen a butthole wink?

[KlatGnirahs]

A butthole can wink, nope, maybe it can look pink I think.

Is the sky red?

[Gribley]

Now I think I played many a game where it was

Does shrink-die kill shinks?

[KlatGnirahs]

nope.

is water wet ?

[fstmockalerit672]

Depends on its physical state.
(question already asked 5 posts ago)

Should talking about filesharing be prohibited?