Funny

[bujub22]

The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."

The owner says, "You idiot! You can't treat a cough with laxatives!"

The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he's afraid to cough!"

[bujub22]

A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it.
Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's arse was that eye staring right back at him. "You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."

[bujub22]

Yo mama is so nasty, her crabs use her tampon string as a get away rope.

[bujub22]

There are these 3 vampires. The first vampire walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me a shot of blood." The bartender gives him the shot of blood, the vampire drinks it, and leaves.
The second vampire walks into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me a shot of blood." The bartender gives him the shot of blood, the vampire drinks it, and leaves.

The third vampire walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me a shot of water."

The bartender says, "Why do you want a shot of water?"

The vampire pulls out a dirty tampon and says, "Tea time."

[bujub22]

Yo mama is like a hockey player she doesn't change her pad for three periods.

[opivykid]

Hahaha thats some funny shit!

[Is_this_name_taken_already]

good stuff


Keep em coming

[100%]

1stonewasgood

[bujub22]

Two wrestlers an American and a Russian were the finialists in the World Championship event.

They were preparing to meet each other in the final round and the American coach was giving instructions to his star wrestler.

The coach was saying, "Beware of the Russian and his famous hold the pretzel. No one has ever got out of that hold!."

The match begins and the wrestlers cirlcle for an advantage. The Russian finally gets an advantage on the American and in moments he is in the dreaded pretzel hold.

The spectators start to get up to leave, even the coach throws his arms in the air and proceeds to leave.

Suddenly there is a blood curdling scream and the Russian goes flying across the canvas, and the American wrestler feebly crawls over and pins him for the title.

Later the American coach asked, "How did you get out of that hold?"

The wrestler responds, "Well I knew I was dead meat when he got me in that hold. I opened my eyes and through the blur I could see these big pink testicles.

So I stretched my neck with all my might and I bit down on those babies just as hard as I could.

It's amazing how much strength you can come up with when you bite your own balls!"

[bujub22]

I see a guy sitting outside a place called "Suzy's Legs" and I ask "What are ya doing?"

He responds "Waiting for Suz's legs to open so I can get a drink."

[bujub22]

A guy says, "Doc, I think I've got a sex problem. I can't get it up for my wife anymore."

The doctor says, "Come back tomorrow and bring her with you."

The next day, the guy shows up with his wife. The doctor says to the wife, "Take off your clothes and lie on the table."

She does it, and the doctor walks around the table a few times looking her up and down.

He pulls the guy to the side and says, "You're fine. She doesn't give me a hard-on, either."

[bujub22]

A guy walked into a bar one day and noticed a jar full of money on the counter. He asked the bartender what it was for and the bartender replied that if he could go into the back and make the donkey laugh, he could have that jar of money.

So the guy walks in the back and a few minutes he comes out with the donkey laughing his head off. He gets his money and walks out.

The next day the same guy went to the same bar and noticed another jar of money sittin on the counter. The bartender, when asked, said that if he could go in the back and make the donkey cry, he could have that jar of money.

So the guy goes in the back and about 5 minutes later comes out with the donkey crying huge tears.

As the guy was about to leave, the bartender stopped him and asked him how he made the donkey laugh and cry.

The guy replied: The first time I told him I had a bigger dick then he did, and the second time I proved it.

[gungrave]

:lol: :lol: :lol: