PDA

View Full Version : Arggghhh!!!



Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 11:22 AM
I have people in my office, eyeing up my room!
I think I'm being moved to the bin cupboard. :unsure:

How do I convince them my office is pants, and they should look elsewhere? :huh:


/sniffles. :(

Celerystalksme
10-11-2004, 11:23 AM
Get an axe and kill them all :D

Guillaume
10-11-2004, 11:23 AM
How do I convince them my office is pants, and they should look elsewhere? :huh:

Usually a baseball/cricket bat does the trick.
Growling, drooling and staring for long seconds can help too. :wacko:

100%
10-11-2004, 11:25 AM
Sue the Bastards - Sexual harasment and when finished kik em in the balls

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 11:25 AM
They would probably move me to the nut house, Gurahl.
But thanks.



I don't wanna move out. :(

Guillaume
10-11-2004, 11:27 AM
Padded walls are trendy this season...
Ask Yogi. ;)

Mr. Mulder
10-11-2004, 11:29 AM
Tell them it’s haunted and then say “booogibooogi” really loud and fast, they’ll have no choice but to let you be ;)

manker
10-11-2004, 11:31 AM
If you do get moved to the closet, say hi to Dan for me :wub:

DanB
10-11-2004, 11:33 AM
If you do get moved to the closet, say hi to Dan for me :wub:


:blink: :blink:


That's not good Lilmiss, try staring them at mencaingly as they walk about looking

Yogi
10-11-2004, 11:37 AM
Padded walls are trendy this season...
Ask Yogi. ;):blink:

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 11:37 AM
:( S'not gonna work.
I don't have to pay rent for my office, so they are entitled to move me anywhere they want.

At the moment, I get the entire office to myself, which means I can listen to what I want, flick rubber bands around and play umbrella lancing on my spinny chair.

Can't indulge in any of it if they move me in with someone else. :huh:

DanB
10-11-2004, 11:38 AM
Thoughtless bastards :(

Celerystalksme
10-11-2004, 11:38 AM
If you do get moved to the closet, say hi to Dan for me :wub:

now i think ur lying in the songs you downloaded for pussy thread :p

manker
10-11-2004, 11:42 AM
now i think ur lying in the songs you downloaded for pussy thread :p
Ah, but I transcend gender, please don't abbreviate that ;)

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 11:48 AM
If Dan lives in the bin cupboard, who is the green grumpy muppet in there at the moment? :huh:

I'm going to complain to my oldies.
I'm sure they will kick up hell for me, they seem to enjoy a good gumble. :D

DarthInsinuate
10-11-2004, 12:00 PM
Ah, but I am trans gender,
lilmiss this is a good opprortunity for a poorly-plotted-Saturday-morning-serial-esque caper, aslong as there aren't any meddling kids you should pull it off

manker
10-11-2004, 12:10 PM
lilmiss this is a good opprortunity for a poorly-plotted-Saturday-morning-serial-esque caper, aslong as there aren't any meddling kids you should pull it off
Innuendo is running amock this morning :o

You just wait until I've got a reason to edit your posts to reveal your innermost feelings and desires :dry:

Spider_dude
10-11-2004, 12:13 PM
get your tits out.

i know this wont help your situation but it will help mine.

JONNO_CELEBS
10-11-2004, 12:17 PM
I have people in my oriffice, eyeing up my room!
I think I'm being moved to the bin cupboard. :unsure:
.
:o Say what? :P

Ok nuff jokes, what office?:blink:

Jonno :cool:

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 03:14 PM
get your tits out.
:D :lol: :D
You had your chance.


They have decided on moving me in with a Housing and Letting Co-ordinator.
Ironic, huh?

Maybe she will play telephone wire skipping with me. :huh:

DanB
10-11-2004, 03:16 PM
Maybe she will play telephone wire skipping with me. :huh:


You can but try

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 03:26 PM
And if she doesn't wanna join in, I can indulge in some of these....

101 Ways To Be Annoying
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public
consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for random times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.
47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J. Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes."
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad," the Archies' "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.


M'hahahaha. :01:

DanB
10-11-2004, 03:30 PM
i think she would probably beg them to give your office back

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 03:37 PM
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
ears.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.


These are my faves, will try n do one each day. :01:

DanB
10-11-2004, 03:46 PM
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
ears.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.


These are my faves, will try n do one each day. :01:


I would piss myself if someone was doing that at work.

Did you ever see that show where every week two people had to get themselves sacked from their jobs on the first day? :unsure:

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 03:50 PM
Yeah, I liked that.
But they only won a days wages, so don't get any idea's. :D

DanB
10-11-2004, 03:53 PM
:lol: okay I won't.

Some of them were flipping hilarious though

hobbes
10-11-2004, 05:16 PM
When they came to your office you should have asked them if they were there is investigate that rotten smell that creeps in from the vent or to set traps. Be wearing your best innocent face.

Lilmiss
10-11-2004, 05:20 PM
When they came to your office you should have asked them if they were there is investigate that rotten smell that creeps in from the vent or to set traps. Be wearing your best innocent face.

:D Brilliant.
Bit too late, but It gives me another idea to harrass the new workmate with.

lynx
10-11-2004, 05:27 PM
:D Brilliant.
Bit too late, but It gives me another idea to harrass the new workmate with. So which are you planning, rotten smells or traps?

Edit: Don't bother with the innocent face thing, you'll never get away with it.

Proper Bo
10-11-2004, 05:27 PM
Rotten smelling traps?

Gemby!
10-11-2004, 06:47 PM
How do I convince them my office is pants, and they should look elsewhere? :huh:


/sniffles. :(
Do a little dance, make a little love, GET DOWN TONIGHT ! :01:

or make the room smelly and messy, your choice ;)

Gripper
10-11-2004, 07:05 PM
Prawns behind the radiator or stick them behind the draw in her desk :whistling