Santa in the Shopping Centre's

[Jon L. Obscene]

I thought of this the other day when some bloke asked a mate to be Santa in a shop for the kids to visit.

This is something I would love to do, I get lots of kids come in where I work cos I'm only 1/4 mile from the schools, I can usually make them giggle or laugh and stuff.
The thing is I don't think I could do the santa thing.

Why? The Dangers of working with kids now, the dangers for Adults.
I mean yesterday 2 girls were in my shop (12-13y/o) they come in often as do most, one had some money and the other did'nt, the 1 without wanted her friend to buy her a Dime bar 25p, they argued and her friend said no, so I bought it for her.
After they went I was thinking, I done that as simply a nice thing to do, I often do it but by the same token would certain people look at me as being a pervert?
The same with the Santa thing, it only takes a kid to say that the Santa done something bad and whether you innocent or not it tarnishes your reputation, 4ever branded a pervert.
This maybe different where you live but I think this is so sad, I would really like to do the shop Santa thing but I'm not brave enough, I'm scared I could end up in clink or branded something I'm not cos a mouthy kid says I done something I did'nt.

What happend to the world?

Why is it now a perversed thing to say "Come and sit on Santa's knee little boy"?

I did when I was a kid, but would you say that to a kid now?

Jonno :cool:

[Virtualbody1234]

I know what you mean. It's even getting to the point where it's considered inappropreate to even talk to children these days. Very sad indeed.

[Strangelove]

It is indeed, however dont worry Jonno we already know your a pervert, and it has nothing to do with the kids :)

[Jon L. Obscene]

I know what you mean. It's even getting to the point where it's considered inappropreate to even talk to children these days. Very sad indeed.

I know, I've only really realised this since working in a shop.
You take things for granted, I had a big choc bar yesterday and offered a bit to a lad called Danny, known him for a few months , he's 10 I show him magic tricks and stuff like that but always feel a bit uncomfortable, that's simply not fair.
I'm certainly not any kind of real pervert, only in the comical sense.

Maybe I'm being a little bit over the top about this but round this area the whole Soham thing is still fresh in people's minds, especially with the new evidence and all.

At heart I'm a kid myself, I stick up for them, it annoys the mums cos they want sweets, the mum says no and I say "Awww don't be so mean" and stuff like that. I dunno , the whole situation is fecked up :(

Jonno :cool:

[hobbes]

I read the first few lines passing by the computer.

I immediately thought, "Watch out, they're going to think you're Chester the Molestor, best leave Santa'ing to old men".

Then I read the rest, looks like you were fearing that as well. Pretty sad that we automatically fear kindness towards our children, and assume that it is a cover for perversion.

Sometimes children will talk to me in stores and it makes me uncomfortable. I tell them to run along because I fear that their mothers will turn around and think that I was the one talking to the kid, not the other way around.

Jonno, you are a victim of "profiling".

[NikkiD]

It's unfortunate that kindness is often attached to an ulterior motive.

It has happened more than once that I've been in a large store, and seen a frantic child who can't find their mother. I've picked the child up and hugged them, and taken them to the cash register to have the mother paged, and tried to calm them down. The mother is always grateful. Your comments make me wonder, would that mother be as grateful if I were a man and had taken the same action? How would I feel if that were me?

I've run into the situation before, with my son Nate, when he was just little. He's always been a very outgoing child, and used to talk to everyone. In a store, he'd strike up conversation with anyone who walked by the cart he was seated in, in a restaurant, he'd become best friends with the waiter/waitress before the end of a meal. Hell, at 2 1/2 he was so proud of being potty trained and wearing real underwear that he had to pull down his pants in WalMart and yell, "Look, I have Buzz (Lightyear) on my butt!!" I don't honestly don't recall having jumped to any conclusions when a man returned his conversation, it happened frequently, then again, I was with him. Of course he's always been given the warnings that under no circumstances was he to talk to strangers when I'm not there with him.

[Cheese]

Last year whilst walking through the park a child tripped over in front of me, the mother was some ways down the path.

I just stood there like an idiot because the situation was so awkward. Poor kid crying blue murder and dopey old me stood there not daring to do anything in case the mother screamed blue murder and not wanting to just walk away...

[hobbes]

It's unfortunate that kindness is often attached to an ulterior motive.

It has happened more than once that I've been in a large store, and seen a frantic child who can't find their mother. I've picked the child up and hugged them, and taken them to the cash register to have the mother paged, and tried to calm them down. The mother is always grateful. Your comments make me wonder, would that mother be as grateful if I were a man and had taken the same action? How would I feel if that were me?

I've run into the situation before, with my son Nate, when he was just little. He's always been a very outgoing child, and used to talk to everyone. In a store, he'd strike up conversation with anyone who walked by the cart he was seated in, in a restaurant, he'd become best friends with the waiter/waitress before the end of a meal. Hell, at 2 1/2 he was so proud of being potty trained and wearing real underwear that he had to pull down his pants in WalMart and yell, "Look, I have Buzz (Lightyear) on my butt!!" I don't honestly don't recall having jumped to any conclusions when a man returned his conversation, it happened frequently, then again, I was with him. Of course he's always been given the warnings that under no circumstances was he to talk to strangers when I'm not there with him.

Yeah Nikki, if mom is making eye contact with me and is right there, no problem. It is when kids stop and mom walks on and keeps going while the child talks to you. That is what worries me.

As for Santa, Mom will be there, but there is this whole physical contact thing and bum touching accusations that become the issue.

My mother was molested by her priest a 5 year old. She was swimming from her priest, on one side of the pool, to her father on the other. She was little but knew he should not be touching her there. You just never know what is going through the heads of people who actively take a role in being with children. I asked her why she didn't tell her father. She said, "Oh, my dad would have shot him, killed him on the spot" (My grandfather was a policeman) I just endured and never went back".

This is how we should do it. Santa and kids talk by phone, separated by a barrier. Then SAnta could slide a gift through a slot.
http://www.lifespark.org/img/visit.jpg

[orcutt989]

Yeah Nikki, if mom is making eye contact with me and is right there, no problem. It is when kids stop and mom walks on and keeps going while the child talks to you. That is what worries me.

As for Santa, Mom will be there, but there is this whole physical contact thing and bum touching accusations that become the issue.

My mother was molested by her priest a 5 year old. She was swimming from her priest, on one side of the pool, to her father on the other. She was little but knew he should not be touching her there. You just never know what is going through the heads of people who actively take a role in being with children. I asked her why she didn't tell her father. She said, "Oh, my dad would have shot him, killed him on the spot" (My grandfather was a policeman) I just endured and never went back".

This is how we should do it. Santa and kids talk by phone, separated by a barrier. Then SAnta could slide a gift

Haha, perfect.



I thought of this the other day when some bloke asked a mate to be Santa in a shop for the kids to visit.
What?

[Biggles]

Mall Santa's are the abominations of capitalism. Having been checked out by time and motion studies, knee sitting was dispensed with as inefficient. One pays one's tenner and is whisked through at a rate of knots that would put a white knuckle ride to shame.

[hobbes]

Mall Santa's are the abominations of capitalism. Having been checked out by time and motion studies, knee sitting was dispensed with as inefficient. One pays one's tenner and is whisked through at a rate of knots that would put a white knuckle ride to shame.

Biggles, the Santas are for children. You can't expect them to show you the same interest as the wee ones and God knows you won't be allowed to sit on their laps.

Sorry for the rude wake up call, but you needed it. Your wife will probably send me a gift for this.

[Biggles]

Biggles, the Santas are for children. You can't expect them to show you the same interest as the wee ones and God knows you won't be allowed to sit on their laps.

Sorry for the rude wake up call, but you needed it. Your wife will probably send me a gift for this.

:huh: Aw crap! That has really burst my bubble.


Explains the altercation with security though. :ph34r:

[Mathea]

This is how we should do it. Santa and kids talk by phone, separated by a barrier. Then SAnta could slide a gift through a slot.



actually, they can:

US (http://www.redskies.com/telsanta.htm)
UK (http://www.nci.ie/santa/)

[Jon L. Obscene]

under no circumstances was he to talk to strangers .

Thats just it, to the majority of kids who come into the store where I work, I AM a stranger, out of curiosity if Nate came home and said he'd been to the shop but did'nt have enough money but there was a man who worked there paid the extra needed, how would you feel?

@Cheese.......I been in that situation, I got funny looks one day when I pulled a young lad out of the sea, he was in trouble, as I carried him up the beach a couple of people looked at me in disgust, I could'nt believe it, they obviously had'nt seen whats going on and the kid was screaming for his mum.
I felt horrible :(

Jonno :cool:

[NikkiD]

I would probably question it. You don't often find people who are that nice for no reason anymore.

Although you're not a stranger, he talks to you all the time. You're just strange. :P

[Jon L. Obscene]

:( But I am (nice for no reason, well strange too but you know :lol: )

I know it sounds corny but I'd do anything for anyone if I thought it would make them smile, I just remember what it was like to watch your mates eating sweets and you did'nt have any and 25p or whatever is nothing to me, it's a pack of cig papers ffs, better spent on a choc bar for a kid than something bad for everyones health.

It sucks

Jonno :cool:

Edit: Also I was weary of even starting this thread, it just seems something no one talks about, but please everyone seemed to have read what I meant and got my point :)

[vidcc]

It is a sad reflection on society that we do think this way, however the fact that it is open for discussion is probably a good thing. Back in the day such things were kept hush hush.

[Biggles]

People are rarely nice for no reason. Thinking it is the right thing to do is not no reason it is just not an obviously material or selfish reason. :)

However, the storing riches in heaven approach to life is less common these days.

[Jon L. Obscene]

Ok Question.

Is what I do quite often wrong?

This means giving a kid 10p or 20p cos they short of money etc.

Or maybe a better question would be, would it be better not to do this?

Having said all this I sometimes do the same for adults :rolleyes:

Jonno :cool:

[hobbes]

I don't know, there is something about going without that makes one appreciate things.

[Jon L. Obscene]

There's also something about just being nice makes one feel apriciated :)

Jonno :cool:

[Strangelove]

Your appreciated Jonno :wub:

[Everose]

There's also something about just being nice makes one feel apriciated :)

Jonno :cool:



You treat people as you would like to be treated, Jonno. I hope you never stop doing this. It is a sad state of affairs that you have to stop and worry that it will be construed as anything but this.

It is people like you that make me return to a store again and again. I wish you were closer, I would bring my little grandgirls in to visit with you!! :D

[Jon L. Obscene]

I wish you were closer, I would bring my little grandgirls in to visit with you!! :D

This is a good example, why is it when I read that something felt wrong?
See thats not right and proves the point that it's just fecked up :frusty:

Thankyou tho ER :)

Jonno :cool:

[NikkiD]

Perhaps this is proof that open discussion is not always a good thing?

I don't know, when I was a kid, I don't remember ever worrying that someone would touch me inappropriately. I don't recall ever wondering if someone had ulterior motives because they were nice to me. Studies in the past have shown that the instances of kidnapping/molestation haven't increased in the last 20 or 30 years, (I'll try and find a study if requested), just that the openness of discussion about it has increased. We see reports of it more frequently than we did and it makes us fear things that we didn't fear years ago.

There is nothing wrong with being a nice person, just for the sake of being nice. I don't think the problem is with you Jon, I think the problem is with the stigmas that society has placed on those types of niceties.

[Everose]

I guess I have never questioned when someone is being nice that it was anything but they were just a nice person. :unsure: Maybe I have led a sheltered life or something. :blushing:

[Jon L. Obscene]

The best thing is when a lil kid imitate me, like I stand there with my arms folded and this lil lad was recreating every move I done :lol:

There was actually an incident a while back with a woman and her 3 daughters, she's very ........odd, no tv allowed nor puters or games, kids in bed by 7pm even the 12 y/o and all that kind of stuff, never smiles, well her youngest would be about 5, she had a sad face so I went down to her level and asked her why the sad face and then proceeded to pull faces at her, made her laugh but her mum pulled her away as if I was gonna hurt her, I mean come on it's a bit much don't you think, I was quite upset about that.

Jonno :cool:

[NikkiD]

I think I probably would have been laughing as hard as the little girl was. I've seen some the faces you pull. :lol:

As I stated before though, it is a shame that people can't just accept someone being nice. I personally don't think you should stop being nice because some people don't get it. It makes you happy to see people smile and laugh, if that's your only motive, then why not? For every person that sneers at you for it, there's probably another who'd say you made their day. :)

[Jon L. Obscene]

Interesting thinking tho is'nt it, I mean being on building sites etc I never spoke to any kids but being in a shop which is where all the kids go on their way home from school kinda puts you in a different situation, prolly just cos I's a big kid too :01:

Jonno :cool:

[Strangelove]

Big? :ohmy:

:01: