Are you a Malphoy?

[dwightfry]

Definition: Malphoy - A person with geeky tendencies and knowledge, but is not neccesarily a geek.
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Okay, so if any of the following statements pertain to you, add the points to your score. Then submit your results to the poll.
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(2pnt) If you have Anime in your porn collection, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you prefer Macs over PCs, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you thought Episodes 1 and 2 were great and expect 3 to live up to the same standards, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you own 2 paintball guns, but don't play the game, you just might be a Malphoy

(2pnt) If you own 2 paintball guns, and do play the game, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you wonder how your friend can get by with a Pentium 2, you just might be a Malphoy

(3pnt) If you +5 virtual bonus to charisma means anything to you, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If the Cartoon Network is part of your daytime television, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you can easily build a computer, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you bring technology into a drinking game, you just might be a Malphoy (Movies and Television do not count)

(1pnt) If you know that a Star Destroyer could take out the Enterprise, you just might be a Malphoy

(3pnt) If you know that the Enterprise E could take out a Star Destroyer, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you use 1337 on a regular bases, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you realize that you could very well be part of the Matrix, you just might be a Malphoy

Subtract .5 point if you smoke
Subtract .5 points if you drink at least semi-regularly
Subtract 2 points if you do any other illegal drugs
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Now keep in mind, this is on an a personality basis. All because you don't have anime porn right at this moment, doesn't mean it doesn't fit your personality.

[manker]

5 Points.

Btw, the Enterprise would pwn any number of X-wings.

[dwightfry]

You just made me realize I forgot to add a statement about using Leet.

EDIT: okay, it's been added, and you got 6

[DanB]

(1pnt) If you thought Episodes 1 and 2 were great and expect 3 to live up to the same standards, you just might be a Malphoy

Star Wars?

wtf does it mean if you end up with minus numbers? :huh:

[dwightfry]

yep, Starwars

Negative results go in the 0-1 catagory. And if ya get 21, you obviously you fall under the 17-20 catagory.

[manker]

You just made me realize I forgot to add a statement about using Leet.

EDIT: okay, it's been added, and you got 6

I don't, do I. How did you know :ermm:

[DanB]

yep, starwars

Negative numbers get rounded to zero


So I need to be a little more openminded and accepting? :blink:

[dwightfry]

yeah, I just threw this thing together this morning, don't take it too seriously.

Someday AI is going to start taking over. A Malphoy was the term my friends used for the 16yr old kid sitting at his computer saving the world. The definition quickly changed to the one I gave, and has been part of our vocabulary for a while now.

[DanB]

I dont see how at one end of a scale you can be a geek at the other end you need to be more openminded and more acceptable?

Surely the two go hand in hand as one?

[Guillaume]

(1pnt) If you know that a fleet of X-wings could take out the Enterprise, you just might be a Malphoy

(3pnt) If you know that the Enterprise could take out a fleet of X-wings, you just might be a Malphoy


Which Enterprise? NX01, NCC1701 A, B, C, D or E? :geek:

8.5, by the way.

[manker]

Which Enterprise? NX01, NCC1701 A, B, C, D or E? :geek: :lol:

It doesn't really matter, X-Wings are tiny things. The Enterprise wouldn't even notice their puny laser fire.

Picard (incredulous): Surely they're not attacking us, Number 1.

Riker (sarcastic): Perhaps they're trying to communicate.

[dwightfry]

Which Enterprise? NX01, NCC1701 A, B, C, D or E?

Malphoy! That's it, you must now add 3 points on to your score! DO IT! :P


I dont see how at one end of a scale you can be a geek at the other end you need to be more openminded and more acceptable?

Surely the two go hand in hand as one?

The idea was that if ya don't have any geeky tendencies you must be really closed minded because some of that stuff really is entertaining and/or useful. But don't think about it too much. My flavor text (flavor text?!? 2 points added to my score) doesn't mean anything.

[dwightfry]

It doesn't really matter, X-Wings are tiny things. The Enterprise wouldn't even notice their puny laser fire.

Picard (incredulous): Surely they're not attacking us, Number 1.

Riker (sarcastic): Perhaps they're trying to communicate.

Fine, what should I replace it with. The Federation VS The Rebel Alliance? (Just goes to show, I'm not a Malphoy in the Startrek sense.)

EDIT: okay, I changed x-wings to a star destroyer. I liked X-wings better, but after talking to my hardcore Malphoy friend, he explained that it really would be no contest. Boy am I embarrassed. :rolleyes:

[manker]

Replace it with NX 74656 USS Voyager Vs 2 Romulan Warbirds.

It would be a good battle, the winner would depend who was on Voyager's Bridge. The current Voyager crew would probably get pwned but if it was a dream team Bridge crew then it'd be touch and go.



Edit: Just seen your edit. I don't like that, it's about a mile long, isn't it. Would probably be too cumbersome to even battle a powerful, yet nimble, 'ship like Voyager. :unsure:

[dwightfry]

Replace the what in the where now?!?! 2 more points to you BTW.

[DanB]

:geeks:

[manker]

2 more points to you BTW.:01:

[Peerzy]

Minus 7 :01:

[dwightfry]

Minus 7 :01:

What?!?! How did you pull that one off? You don't subtract if the it doesn't pertain to you.

[dwightfry]

Edit: Just seen your edit. I don't like that, it's about a mile long, isn't it. Would probably be too cumbersome to even battle a powerful, yet nimble, 'ship like Voyager.

That's the super star destroyer. A regular star destroy is pretty close I think. Keyword being 'think.'

[DarthInsinuate]

7, i've never heard of a Malphoy before, but i'm pretty sure i'm a geek

[Peerzy]

(1pnt) If you thought Episodes 1 and 2 were great and expect 3 to live up to the same standards, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you wonder how your friend can get by with a Pentium 2, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you can easily build a computer, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you use 1337 on a regular bases, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you realize that you could very well be part of the Matrix, you just might be a Malphoy

Subtract .5 point if you smoke
Subtract .5 points if you drink at least semi-regularly
Subtract 2 points if you do any other illegal drugs
[/QUOTE]

Just noticed its 0.5 and not 5
:frusty:

Im 2 then :shifty:

[dwightfry]

7, i've never heard of a Malphoy before, but i'm pretty sure i'm a geek

It's just a word my group of friends came up with last summer. We realized were were all Malphoys in one way or another. But looking at us, we are obviously not geeks. We are druggies.

[manker]

That's the super star destroyer. A regular star destroy is pretty close I think. Keyword being 'think.'Nah, they're like 10 miles long. BS when you think about the logistics involved, I bet they don't even have light speed capability.

Voyager would just pick them off, even with Wesley Geptard Crusher at the helm :stuart:

[dwightfry]

Nah, they're like 10 miles long. BS when you think about the logistics involved, I bet they don't even have light speed capability.

Voyager would just pick them off, even with Wesley Geptard Crusher at the helm :stuart:

Dude, you better watch it. You are well on your way to hitting geek status

[Formula1]

i got 4 points....

[DarthInsinuate]

Nah, they're like 10 miles long. BS when you think about the logistics involved, I bet they don't even have light speed capability.

Voyager would just pick them off, even with Wesley Geptard Crusher at the helm :stuart:
it's true that Star Destroyers, have all the manueverability of shit in a toilet bowl, but that's because they usually travel in groups, with full fighter and bomber squadrons in the hanger, a wing of TIE bombers would pwn the Enterprise with torpedos

[manker]

it's true that Star Destroyers, have all the manueverability of shit in a toilet bowl, but that's because they usually travel in groups, with full fighter and bomber squadrons in the hanger, a wing of TIE bombers would pwn the Enterprise with torpedosWell yeah, a Star Destroyer, a fighter squadron, a bomber squadron and a whole wing of TIE fighters probably would pwn one spaceship :blink:

Altho' the rest of the Federation fleet would come to assist, I didn't extol their virtues.

We had this trouble with the Batman Vs Superman thread when JPaul tried to bring Gandalf into the equation to help t'Dark Lord. It's just unfair.

This is one on one, dogfight to the death, tete a tete, Kramer Vs Kramer ... erm, you get the point :ermm:

[sArA]

And all this time I thought Malfoy was one of Harry Potter's enemies.....

But....of course, if you all add 'Q' to the dimension so to speak....your previous discussions as to who has the biggest penis...oh sorry...greater firepower is moot.

[manker]

But....of course, if you all add 'Q' to the dimension so to speak....your previous discussions as to who has the biggest penis...oh sorry...greater firepower is moot.Add Q to what dimension :blink:

Come on, Sara. We're trying to have a serious chat about Galaxy Class Spaceships and non-gravitational manoeuverability here.

[Snee]

Nah, they're like 10 miles long. BS when you think about the logistics involved, I bet they don't even have light speed capability.

Voyager would just pick them off, even with Wesley Geptard Crusher at the helm :stuart:
I think they do have hyperdrives.

The people in Star Wars have forgotten more about building ships than the people in star fleet have ever discovered.

I mean, the story goes back 5000 years+, counting the comics, and according to those they had space travel back then.
[EDit: Counting with Vulcan history, they've only had spaceflight for maybe 2000 years, and I don't think there's been anyone much more developed than them contributing to development in Star Fleet.
Whereas I have no idea how long spacetravel has been around in the star wars universe for human beings except 5000+.]

I do wonder about those ships in Star Wars making sounds in space tho', I mean those ships must be seriously leaky to explain all that gas that's supposed to carry the soundwaves according to Lucas n' Co.

It's hard to compare techs anyway, 'cos we've never seen them do a dogfight. For all I know it might be that the one ion cannon on one of those old Y-wings might be enough to take out voyager.

Besides, if the pilot has the force they might be able to hit something important, or failing that Janeway. 'cos I want Janeway gone.

[TheDave]

half a point or possibly 1.5 :01:

[ahctlucabbuS]

-.5
I don't see how beeing a geek or a malphoy is mutually exclusive of beeing a closed minded asshole though ;)

Let me guess, you came up with that one as the weed left in the bag progressively
went bye bye.

[Cheese]

6. :01:

[Busyman]

(1pnt) If you thought Episodes 1 and 2 were great and expect 3 to live up to the same standards, you just might be a Malphoy

(2pnt) If you own 2 paintball guns, and do play the game, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you wonder how your friend can get by with a Pentium 2, you just might be a Malphoy

(3pnt) If you +5 virtual bonus to charisma means anything to you, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you can easily build a computer, you just might be a Malphoy

(1pnt) If you know that a Star Destroyer could take out the Enterprise, you just might be a Malphoy

(3pnt) If you know that the Enterprise E could take out a Star Destroyer, you just might be a Malphoy

12 :)

[manker]

I think they do have hyperdrives.

The people in Star Wars have forgotten more about building ships than the people in star fleet have ever discovered.

I mean, the story goes back 5000 years+, counting the comics, and according to those they had space travel back then.
[EDit: Counting with Vulcan history, they've only had spaceflight for maybe 2000 years, and I don't think there's been anyone much more developed than them contributing to development in Star Fleet.
Whereas I have no idea how long spacetravel has been around in the star wars universe for human beings except 5000+.]

I do wonder about those ships in Star Wars making sounds in space tho', I mean those ships must be seriously leaky to explain all that gas that's supposed to carry the soundwaves according to Lucas n' Co.

It's hard to compare techs anyway, 'cos we've never seen them do a dogfight. For all I know it might be that the one ion cannon on one of those old Y-wings might be enough to take out voyager.

Besides, if the pilot has the force they might be able to hit something important, or failing that Janeway. 'cos I want Janeway gone.:01:

If a Star Destroyer has warp capability, which I doubt 'cause I've never seen a reference a SD having it, then there is a slight chance of it escaping from Voyager with it's arse intact. The dogfight scenario would call for manoeuverability which the Star Destroyer simply cannot have due to it's bulk. It's just a mothership after all. Without it's fleet of attack vessels it would be vulnerable to the skimpiest of attacks.

I guess you're right about the history concerning the time frame in which they've had to develop their attack strategies and space travel being in excess of that which would be available to The Federation but the Star Destroyer is all about the total package, the complete fleet of ships. Voyager is a standalone fighting vessel.

Isolate the mothership, which is what a dogfight is all about, and you've a lame duck.

As you say, the hardware is difficult to call but in Star Wars they just seem to be fire off a volley and hope for the best - all power and no guile. Whereas Star Trek 'ships have all sorts of tactical connotations to their firepower. Often using their high powered photon torpedoes as a feint to cover a devious tachion ray into the belly of an opponent's warp engine or sending a medium powered phaser to disable main power.

[Cheese]

The Enterprise would just beam a photon torpedo onto the bridge of the SD.

End of story.

[Snee]

Can we be sure that the enterprise, or voyager, could penetrate the shielding on a star destroyer?

Granted, in the movies they do seem to let everything in to take a shot at them, for some unfathomable reason, but as far as I can understand larger imperial vessels do have some sort of (heavy) shielding. And if it's anything like the shielding on the ships in star trek it should negate the beaming scenario.

As an aside, tie fighters apparently don't. Apparently lack of shielding and a lack of hyperdrive was to be a preventative measure against cowardly retreats or somesuch, although it does seem to be a really good method of losing pilots fast rater than a really cunning morale booster.

Star destroyers are also what I think is a fair bit larger than the enterprise which might let them soak up quite a bit of phaser damage, and they do have a lot of laser batteries, more guns in fact than the enterprise's phaser banks.

Also, it should be important to note that a star destroyer is something of a carrier ship. Just as the star fleet vessels come with with a complement of shuttles, and photon torpedoes, a star destroyer will be packing squadrons of tie fighters and tie bombers. They should probably be considered part of it's armament, as no fully equipped star destroyer would leave port without them.

What star fleet do have going for them is the flexibility of their vessels. They can fly faster [EDit: umm, the bloke on the site says they can not :unsure: ] and they are more agile, like you say. And they do have some fancy tricks with the power routage. Which is why I'd want to give them the benefit of a doubt, unlike some.


When looking around on the web I found something you might find interesting btw.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Empire/Essays/FiveMinutes.html

EDit: Also, Imperial vessels travel through hyperspace, not the warp. What the difference is, except for how it looks I don't know :unsure:

Which is the faster form of FTL I'm not sure about either, tho' I'm betting on hyperspace [EDit:a hell of a lot faster, according to the bloke].

[Barbarossa]

Can we be sure that the enterprise, or voyager, could penetrate the shielding on a star destroyer?

Granted, in the movies they do seem to let everything in to take a shot at them, for some unfathomable reason, but as far as I can understand larger imperial vessels do have some sort of (heavy) shielding. And if it's anything like the shielding on the ships in star trek it should negate the beaming scenario.

As an aside, tie fighters apparently don't. Apparently lack of shielding and a lack of hyperdrive was to be a preventative measure against cowardly retreats or somesuch, although it does seem to be a really good method of losing pilots fast rater than a really cunning morale booster.

Star destroyers are also what I think is a fair bit larger than the enterprise which might let them soak up quite a bit of phaser damage, and they do have a lot of laser batteries, more guns in fact than the enterprise's phaser banks.

Also, it should be important to note that a star destroyer is something of a carrier ship. Just as the star fleet vessels come with with a complement of shuttles, and photon torpedoes, a star destroyer will be packing squadrons of tie fighters and tie bombers. They should probably be considered part of it's armament, as no fully equipped star destroyer would leave port without them.

What star fleet do have going for them is the flexibility of their vessels. They can fly faster [EDit: umm, the bloke on the site says they can not :unsure: ] and they are more agile, like you say. And they do have some fancy tricks with the power routage. Which is why I'd want to give them the benefit of a doubt, unlike some.


When looking around on the web I found something you might find interesting btw.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Empire/Essays/FiveMinutes.html

EDit: Also, Imperial vessels travel through hyperspace, not the warp. What the difference is, except for how it looks I don't know :unsure:

Which is the faster form of FTL I'm not sure about either, tho' I'm betting on hyperspace [EDit:a hell of a lot faster, according to the bloke].

What you've got to remember is that The Imperiums Hyperdrive technology is extremely powerful, yet also extremely limited.

For example, they clearly fitted out the Death Star with a hyperdrive, that's how it managed to get from the Alderaan system to the Yavin system in double-quick time; However they could only navigate to reappear from hyperspace on the wrong side of the planet, and had to resort to orbiting the planet at a snails-pace, giving the Rebels a chance to destroy it.

Clearly, if they had had the capability of a hyperdrive "hop" to the other side of the planet, they would have used it.

Also, the fearsome weapon that can destroy terrestrial-type planets, is clearly ineffective against gas giants, as otherwise they would have blasted it straight into the middle of Yavin, probably taking out the moon in the process, destroying the rebels without even having to get their hands dirty.

Again, this did not happen, so presumably, the big gun isn't that good either.

If the Death Star's weaponry is that limited, then I doubt a Star Destroyer could take on any of the Federation's ships and come out in one piece. Also, they have a habit of crashing into each other, which doesn't help durting tight formation flying manouevres.



Anyway, this is all pretty academic. The Andromeda Ascendent would kick all of their arses... ;)

[Snee]

If the Death Star's weaponry is that limited, then I doubt a Star Destroyer could take on any of the Federation's ships and come out in one piece. Also, they have a habit of crashing into each other, which doesn't help durting tight formation flying manouevres.
The death star is the size of a small moon, and built to attack planets, any spacebound weapons were purely defensive. The star destroyers on the other hand are made for ship to ship combat.

And if they do have the sizes and the firepower mentioned in that link, brute force alone should be a massive factor in their favour. Hell according to that site boba fett's ship is superior to the enterprise D when it comes to firepower and acceleration.



Anyway, this is all pretty academic. The Andromeda Ascendent would kick all of their arses... ;)

That is true tho', oh so true.

[clocker]

What you've got to remember is that The Imperiums Hyperdrive technology is extremely powerful, yet also extremely limited.

For example, they clearly fitted out the Death Star with a hyperdrive, that's how it managed to get from the Alderaan system to the Yavin system in double-quick time; However they could only navigate to reappear from hyperspace on the wrong side of the planet, and had to resort to orbiting the planet at a snails-pace, giving the Rebels a chance to destroy it.

Clearly, if they had had the capability of a hyperdrive "hop" to the other side of the planet, they would have used it.

Also, the fearsome weapon that can destroy terrestrial-type planets, is clearly ineffective against gas giants, as otherwise they would have blasted it straight into the middle of Yavin, probably taking out the moon in the process, destroying the rebels without even having to get their hands dirty.

Again, this did not happen, so presumably, the big gun isn't that good either.

If the Death Star's weaponry is that limited, then I doubt a Star Destroyer could take on any of the Federation's ships and come out in one piece. Also, they have a habit of crashing into each other, which doesn't help durting tight formation flying manouevres.



Anyway, this is all pretty academic. The Andromeda Ascendent would kick all of their arses... ;)


Certainly this post alone is worth 10 Malphoy points.
Double that if you weren't laughing your ass off as you typed.

[Cheese]

The Sattelite of Love would pwn all.

http://www.angelfire.com/ny2/wzardofodd/IMAGES/MST3KSTUFF/SatelliteofLove.jpg

[manker]

Hoi, what you talkin' 'bout fool.

I was firmly in t'Man of Steel's camp. Much as I have every respect for t'Dark Knight.Indeed you were yet we still argued t'point :lol:

Altho' in fairness you were probably having a veiled pop at nsane's ghey Kryptonite-proof suit.

Edit: Chebus, wtf is a sattelite.

[manker]

No we didn't.Did (http://filesharingtalk.com/vb3/showpost.php?p=955943&postcount=103) :pout:

[manker]

:lol: :blushing: :(


Damn.

[lonewolf1229@h]

Hey you Malphoys does anybody know where I could download the free game demo for the movie CARS ?

[tesco]

1.5 :unsure: that good? :)

Theres a problem with the poll though.
0-1, 2-4...where does 1.5 fit in? :rolleyes:

[clocker]

Hey you Malphoys does anybody know where I could download the free game demo for the movie CARS ?
Greatest resurrection of an ancient thread for an irrelevant response ever.
Fact.

[F. Canard]

I bet I could top that.

[clocker]

Even given the almost supernatural improbability of a monoposter finding this thread?

[F. Canard]

Well, my bump confused mike. That's got to count for something, Shirley?

[Barbarossa]

Mine confused asda, so that counts for more, because asda would break mike's arm with a single glare :happy:

[GepperRankins]

i only just crossed the malphoy threshold.


if they put bragging about stealing american tv offa tinternet, and referencing computer games in rl situations i'd be further up like.

[CrabGirl]

I'm a geek about other stuff, like moss and Insects and Science and Poyems and literachure.

So no, not a malphoy.

[Proper Bo]

I scored -2

[j2k4]

-1.5

I'm fine with that.

I miss Renfield. :huh:

[Seedler]

Who's the 17-20 uber malphoy?:blink:

[Barbarossa]

Who's the 17-20 uber malphoy?:blink:

:cool2:

[Gemby!]

I think I'm in the wrong thread.... :happy:

[Barbarossa]

Yeah, right... :dry:

[F. Canard]

I think most people here are in the wrong thread.

You lot need an "Are you a complete bellend?" thread.

[Seedler]

Who's the 17-20 uber malphoy?:blink:

:cool2:

All hail to the uber malphoy.

[Jon L. Obscene]

-8

Kinda glad about that :)

Jonno :cool:

[F. Canard]

-8

Kinda glad about that :)

Jonno :cool:
Glad that you completed a personality test devised on the internet to determine your level of malpyness, yet another arbitrary noun to determine your social collective, which told you that you're, by implication, cooler than everyone else?

[Joel7]

3 :)