the blonde

Did you hear about the blonde sniffing nutrasweet?
Yeah, she thought it was diet coke.



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One woman says to another, "I can't understand why you haven't gone to see that new gynecologist yet!"
"My gynecologist is fine. I don't need to change."

But the new one's so young and handsome, while your gynecologist is so old!"

The other woman replies with a smile, "Yeah, I know. His hands shake all the time!"



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An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in.
The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"

The old timer said, "I'm a golfer and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways."

The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead?" The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 100 years old and, in fact, he golfed with me this morning, and that's why he's still alive... he's a golfer."

The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 118 years old."

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?"

The old timer said, "No... Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he got married."

The Doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Why would a 118-year-old guy want to get married?"

The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?"

funny, but I dont understand the last one.

don't really get it either...
maybe implying the wife is up the duff?

If up the duff means pregnant, then yes.