Take the following test at:
The Billy Dee Williams Smoothness Test!
Are you as smooth as an ice cold bottle of Colt 45?
Then post your score here........
I pity the fool who doesn't match MrT's score.....have a look:
Your total was 36 out of a possible 36 or 100% Smoothness
You're 5 Bottle Smooth!
http://bfcgroup.com/helluvatough/5bottle.jpg
Good luck FuNkY CaPrIcOrN!
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Just honestly answer these very realistic questions and find out how you rate on the smoothest scale of all time. Unlike the SAT, you should guess on ones you're not sure of.
1) When arranging a date with a lovely lady, you feel the best way to romance her is to:
A: Meet her at the Bus stop
B: Pick her up in your '82 GMC Custom Van, but make her sit in the back with Murdock
C: Make her pick up some Colt 45 and Chinese food on her way over to your place; spend entire evening making out on the couch.
2) You are at a movie theater with your lady and a loud gentleman behind you is annoying your girl. What do you do?
A: Do nothing, sweat profusely hoping she doesn't ask you to intervene
B: Move to other seats
C: Look around in an annoyed fashion and sigh, hoping he gets the hint
D: Turn around, growl at the man, and pummel him like you did Sylvester Stallone in Rocky 3
E: Inform your lady that the movie "isn't the real entertainment here" and proceed to make out for the rest of the show
3) Your lady informs you that she wants to see other people, how do you respond?
A: Curl up in the fetal position and cry
B: Find out who these other suckas are, track them down and bounce them off telephone poles
C: Inform her that you were never even dating and then make out with her, thereby assuring her loyalty to you
4) When something surprises you in front of your lady, what do you say?
A: "I just wet my pants!"
B: "Fool! You ever sneak up on me again and I'll punch you in the throat!"
C: "GodDAMN! That's some good Colt 45!"
5) Ladies truly respect a man who drinks:
A: Nature's waste of grain, Mickey's
B: Nature's miracle, wholesome 2% milk
C: Colt 45, and lots of it.
6) You are at a restaurant with your lady and you see a man shouting at his date at the next table; Do you:
A: Ignore it and try to enjoy your meal
B: Shout "I hate suckas that disrespect women and children!" and run over to the table and dance on the guy's head like Michael Flatley, but a lot tougher
C: Stroll over to the table, hit that cat over the head with a bottle of Colt 45 and spend the rest of the evening alternating between your "old" lady and your "new" lady
7) What works every time?
A: St. Ides
B: Beating up fools in order to save an old folks' home
C: Colt 45
8)When speaking with members of the opposite sex, you are:
A: Terrified
B: Angry! Always mean and angry!
C: Too busy making out to talk
9) Suppose a co-worker lies to your boss about you, costing you a valuable raise, do you:
A: File a complaint with your boss
B: Grab him by the ankles and slam him into a tree like a baseball bat
C: Seduce his wife
10) Which best describes your hobbies?
A: Collecting Barbie dolls and comic books
B: Welding, driving vans, ridiculing the insane, and throwin' suckas!
C: Lounging with some Colt 45, making out with lovely ladies and dealing with the Empire
11) The most important accessory in every man's wardrobe is:
A: A pocket protector
B: Gold. Lots and lots of gold...and feather earrings...and a bitchin' denim jacket with the sleeves cut off...and camo pants...and gold, lots of gold.
C: A Lando Calrissean-esque cape
12) When you ask people if you're smooth they say:
A: You? Shouldn't you be playing Dungeons and Dragons?
B: You can't be smooth with a Mandinka Mohawk like that!
C: GodDAMN!
MrT is not only smooth, he's helluva tough!
