Unanswered Kindle Question

Ok, this is really pissing me off. I've searched Google several different times and cannot find any answers about installing a torrent client on the Kindle. I get a lot of results explaining how to transfer downloaded files from my computer to my Kindle with a USB cable, but that has nothing to do with what I'm attempting.

I don't want to use my computer and in either case, I don't have a usb cable for the Kindle.

I want to install a torrent client to my Kindle and download movies and other files directly to my Kindle. I don't want to use any hardware other than the Kindle for this. So I wouldn't use a computer or USB cable.

So, how do install a torrent client on the Kindle itself, download torrents to the Kindle itself, and then open these files on the Kindle itself without using any hardware except the Kindle?

Thanks for any help.

Note: I want to be able to access Torrents through a web browser so even sites like Pirate Bay could be used.

I want my car to fly like the cars in Back to the Future Part 1, any help would be appreciated.

Maybe he means that he has a Kindle Fire.
I can see how some people might think they could get a torrent client to work on that but I don't know of one which would work within the gingerbread OS. With the limited storage space and ease of side-loading, I also can't see why someone would develop one.

I had assumed that every house in the western world now had at least one micro-usb connector but clearly not.
Side-load your movies and email your books direct. What could be simpler.

First thing you'll want to do is load up a default Android interface, not the Amazon one which restricts yourself to the Amazon Marketplace. Then you can install from Google Play, have root access, sideload apps, etc.