A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed,"Dad"
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter
with trembling hands:
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope
with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice-even with all her
piercings, tattoos, and her tight Motorcycle clothes. But it's not only
the passion dad, she's pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy. Even though you don't care for her as she is so much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. She wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of
my dreams too. Joan taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure
for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!! Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of
myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your
grandchildren. Your son, John
PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house. I
just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report
card that's in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me
to come home.
