because a redneck's family tree has no limbs
Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on?
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because a redneck's family tree has no limbs
Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on?
It is on its way out the window.
Why are nuts called nuts and not testicles?
unlike nuts, you can insert popsicle sticks into testicles
Why do guys have nipples?
so that everyone can get on their tits
why am I not watching the soccer on t v?
cuz u r posting here
Where is the lead in a lead pencil?
it appears when you are writing a poison letter
is the head teacher only concerned with the head of a pupil?
Attachment 141685 nope, the iris & sclera too
If I make Jesus-shaped pancakes, but I burnt them. Am I going to hell?
Nope. Not only are they self-healing, but they'll forgive you.
Is it possible Jesus was black?
The big white man with the beard would be getting a divorce
why are farmers always poor?
If we started paying them what they are worth, they'd get lazy. It's for their own good... :sly:
Should parents be honest with their kids?
should kids be honest with their parents?
Does truth destroy credibility?
in a job interview, yes
how do i turn off caps-lock?
Suck the space bar.
Is it OK to use ALL CAPS if you are deaf?
Perhaps, but only if the person reading is hard of hearing.
What does "DNA" really mean?
do not adopt
my keyboard has a return key...where's the borrow key?
al the high numbers under this key %
do you need a lot of dough to be a role model for a bakery firm?
nope, just a bikini
Does fudge taste bad if it's shaped like dog shit?
Only the leftovers.
Could meatloaf been named anything other than meatloaf?
yes, rehash.
Why have I not won the lottery this week?
because you lost last week
If the president was a lesbian, would her partner be the first dyke?
only if they went Dutch
Why are some women called stars when they don't have a twinkle?
cuz they are only safe to look at from a distance
Why do all toasters have a setting which burns your toast to ashes?
they are made by bakers
why do people drink more than they can manage?
They manage, just NOT with grace. :no:
How much is too much?
a lil bit.
We'll die someday?
who are we?
what was the count of monte cristo total?
i for imaginary number since it's a work of fiction
If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?
you would be escorted to the nearest mental facility after you got treatment for scratches.
What did happen?:lol:
Gotta love the interwebs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqV2z0ZiQIc
Is there anything NOT online?
bloody trains:angry:
Should we bring back teaching in schools and colleges?
Yes, cuz is making us smarter.
Why does a silly, little, anti-american, booger eating boa snake, likes to bite people instead of eating its boogers by sticking his tongue up his nose and make himself embrassed in front of 1,000 people, because it was for a prize that it just couldn't live without his dad & his pig because he loved to eat fries with chocolate syrup inside a pie but he couldn't do his homework without listening to music and doing the moonwalk in top of a mountain, crying because he wanted to drink some coffee but he had an idea: he could use bending tools to straighten out his lazy dance shoes from his knee and start to run like a crazy ape wanting to eat a banana pie and drink a milkshake with it because he likes how they taste because they remind him of those days in Long Island where he played with his balls with his friends and then he decided to make pancakes because he could wrap them around a tree or throw to attract some squirrels to find a key looks like a big apple and everyone wants to say weeeeeeeeeee, so why does he can't play soccer when he's planning to fly like a shark and he doesn't like being chased by monkeys so his grandma told him that bees are yellow because they fart really loud so all bears wear nose clips and slippers so they could keep their nose and their feet warm when winter comes and this way they could make a new coat for their babies to play outside and not get a cold and he found a big shoe inside his mouth and he took it out cuz it tasted like his dad's smelly socks and it made him throw up lots of fish guts and butter so he decided to go fishing with his pen pal who wears tons of socks and loves to play poker at a big cafe in some place near their town and tries to invade an old lady's house for taking the cookies that tasted like a hundred year old bread?
:yawn: http://www.mjjcommunity.com/forum/ar.../t-41128.html?
Dion: Environmental or birth defect?
Neither, cuz you're keep quoting me.
What's the next question?
the one after the last answer
where are we all, or y'all going to end up?
Up your bum.
Where does Santa Claus live?
In Rovaniemi.
What's this? (I'm requesting a serious answer)
It means your copy of Window$ is as cheap as yer mum's handbag.
Is it considered a "mercy killing" if it only serves the ones around that person?
No! It is then becomes a merci killing
Am I stupid if I cant think of a stupid question?
The brightest stars burn out the fastest. :console:
If every dog gets a day, what do cats get?
milk and cat food
Should grandchildren buy Easter eggs for their grandad?