Injaculation

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by Artemis

Wow christmas is going to be a hoot at your house. :blink:

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For xmas a while ago, I bought my dad a small bronze cylinder that was about 2 inches long and half an inch diameter.
It was for parting one's buttocks while sunbathing for that all over tan.

If you're wondering, I didn't need to see any pics before I bought that. It was something of an impulse purchase.

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Your dad hasn't at any stage offered any helpful hints on where you could store this marvelous impulse buy by any chance has he? :blink:

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Originally Posted by Artemis

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Originally Posted by manker

For xmas a while ago, I bought my dad a small bronze cylinder that was about 2 inches long and half an inch diameter.
It was for parting one's buttocks while sunbathing for that all over tan.

If you're wondering, I didn't need to see any pics before I bought that. It was something of an impulse purchase.

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Your dad hasn't at any stage offered any helpful hints on where you could store this marvelous impulse buy by any chance has he? :blink:

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:lol:

No but at the time he was all; 'that's fucking stupid'.
Nowadays he seems to enjoy telling people about the welcome divergence from socks and aftershave.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by Artemis

Your dad hasn't at any stage offered any helpful hints on where you could store this marvelous impulse buy by any chance has he? :blink:

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:lol:

No but at the time he was all; 'that's fucking stupid'.
Nowadays he seems to enjoy telling people about the welcome divergence from socks and aftershave.

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It's a good thing that some of your best stories happen later on at night when no-one else is around, they are starting think I'm a bit odd with the sudden outbursts of raucous laughter lately. :blink:

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

I haven't gotten around to understanding that statement yet.

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http://shepee.org/

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I expected something worse given the warnings and actually opened it in a private browsing session. It's just a pee funnel, a practical way to deboard your urine while standing. Originally, I thought you were making up a word or misspelled something. Ever used one? I spent a few days with my dick in a plastic jug once.

The jugs were switched out of course.

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

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Originally Posted by Squeamous

http://shepee.org/

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I expected something worse given the warnings and actually opened it in a private browsing session. It's just a pee funnel, a practical way to deboard your urine while standing. Originally, I thought you were making up a word or misspelled something. Ever used one? I spent a few days with my dick in a plastic jug once.

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Inquiring minds want to know, why did you spend a few days with you dick in a plastic jug? :blink:

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Originally Posted by Artemis

Inquiring minds want to know, why did you spend a few days with you dick in a plastic jug? :blink:

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Hospital stay a few years back, they wouldn't let me out of bed until my heart started beating normal again. I was on a constant IV drip and it made me have to pee like every couple of hours; I was in and out so much I was afraid I was going to soil myself. I basically went without a shower for a week, I had never been so icky in my life.

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

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Originally Posted by Artemis

Inquiring minds want to know, why did you spend a few days with you dick in a plastic jug? :blink:

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Hospital stay a few years back, they wouldn't let me out of bed until my heart started beating normal again. I was on a constant IV drip and it made me have to pee like every couple of hours; I was in and out so much I was afraid I was going to soil myself. I basically went without a shower for a week, I had never been so icky in my life.

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Hospital doesn't count, I thought it was going to be something truly perverse, and anyway I've been in the same situation more than once and they always put a catheter in? :blink:

They didn't have a catheter small enough for Mary ... :smilie4:

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Originally Posted by Artemis

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

Hospital stay a few years back, they wouldn't let me out of bed until my heart started beating normal again. I was on a constant IV drip and it made me have to pee like every couple of hours; I was in and out so much I was afraid I was going to soil myself. I basically went without a shower for a week, I had never been so icky in my life.

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Hospital doesn't count, I thought it was going to be something truly perverse, and anyway I've been in the same situation more than once and they always put a catheter in? :blink:

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Yeah they probably would have used a catheter if it was needed.
Mary was being a bit of a Mary, me thinks.

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Originally Posted by mjmacky

I expected something worse given the warnings and actually opened it in a private browsing session. It's just a pee funnel, a practical way to deboard your urine while standing. Originally, I thought you were making up a word or misspelled something. Ever used one? I spent a few days with my dick in a plastic jug once.

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No, where would I put it once I'd peed? Presumably I'd be somewhere without running water so I wouldn't be able to wash it, and I wouldn't want to just put it back in my pocket, that'd be gross :sick:. Plus it wouldn't really fit in a clutch bag, and I only seem to need emergency pees on nights out.

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Originally Posted by Barbarossa

They didn't have a catheter small enough for Mary ... :smilie4:

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Maybe he's a Jehova's Witness? :idunno:

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Originally Posted by manker

For xmas a while ago, I bought my dad a small bronze cylinder that was about 2 inches long and half an inch diameter.
It was for parting one's buttocks while sunbathing for that all over tan.

If you're wondering, I didn't need to see any pics before I bought that. It was something of an impulse purchase.

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You gave your father a metal rod to stick up his ass in the scorching heat?
And you had the foresight to spin it into a dermatological assist?

You hero.

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Originally Posted by Darth Cicero

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Originally Posted by manker

For xmas a while ago, I bought my dad a small bronze cylinder that was about 2 inches long and half an inch diameter.
It was for parting one's buttocks while sunbathing for that all over tan.

If you're wondering, I didn't need to see any pics before I bought that. It was something of an impulse purchase.

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You gave your father a metal rod to stick up his ass in the scorching heat?
And you had the foresight to spin it into a dermatological assist?

You hero.

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I didn't think of it like that, but it would have been funnier if I did.

I didn't have to put any kind of spin on it because it came in a package fronted with photo of a naked guy, face down, sunbathing.
His buttocks weren't parted, iirc, but there were brief instructions on the back.

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Originally Posted by Artemis

I've been in the same situation more than once and they always put a catheter in? :blink:

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I don't think they would have done that even if I was insured. Or maybe they offered and I said I do not prefer being skewered. The jugs were quite nifty. They were kind of like this (lower one)

Attachment 116714

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Originally Posted by Barbarossa

They didn't have a catheter small enough for Mary ... :smilie4:

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More attempts to goad cock pictures from me, get in line.