Double ended butt plugs ftw.
Or were you to be taking turns :ewww:
Anyway. Less QT and more butt-play next time he comes over, ya hear.
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Double ended butt plugs ftw.
Or were you to be taking turns :ewww:
Anyway. Less QT and more butt-play next time he comes over, ya hear.
That's how those sneaky little bastards win, isn't it? :(Quote:
Originally Posted by Squeamous
Sleeping victims get the butt plug, everyone knows that. She's holding back more than half the story. Also, my divorce doesn't go forward until I find another woman worth pursuing, one that will accept this butt plug.
Call me a romantic, but this reminds me of Cinderella. :wub:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
If the rectum fits, sit on it.
I have noticed Squeam's deafening silence today. It really speaks volumes, doesn't it. Poor gurl probably can't sit long enough to post details. :console:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
Squeams and her butt...is there nothing it can't do?
Fool. Clearly I was referencing Padraig Seamus O' Freud, Misappropriator General to all things mythological.Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtemisActually there is no evidence that Freud ever said this of the Irish, it is yet another urban (or in this case Hollywood) myth. The quote was used in the movie 'The Departed' but has no basis that can be attributed to Freud.Quote:
Originally Posted by chavis
The merkins strike again, always trying to rewrite history or at least Hollywood does and does a severely crap job of it lately. The sad thing is that so many believe shite like U-571, if they saw it in a film it must be true....
Responsible for such greats as 'blacks are better boxers' and 'white men can't jump'.
I'd have thought that much was obvious.
So wot's happening with you. getting wopped and double wopped - or is that one of the things a man of your standing has to give up for lent.
No surprises here. Although my dot landed right where I would have expected it to, there were some pretty ambiguous questions.
Attachment 102867
We have a purple who walks among us. :fear:
Oops. Forgot about Squeams' test.
Famous Personalities: Bruce Willis (:01:), George W. Bush, Vespasian, Colin Powell, Martha Gellhorn (war correspondent), Lyndon B. JohnsonCode:Your Type is
ESTJ
Extraverted Sensing Thinking Judging
Strength of the preferences %
1 12 62 11
Portrait of the Supervisor - Apparently I'm in my dream job. :pinch:
Double wopped is in the vicinity. However there's a double reason for that.Quote:
Originally Posted by manker
The missus kinda gets into things. Like in a big way. It's a bit frightening. She's become absolutely nagasaki'd out with getting the autistic 11 year old into the best grammar school possible. She has probed scholastic probity to fuckery and rubik'd the transfer system to kingdom fucking come, believe you me. The trouble is she won't shut the fuck up about it. It's a barrage of nothing. I have to get away.
So I got this hash stuff. Haven't had hash in years. I find it rather heavy. Which rawks the fucking sawks. All I've been doing is watching the Sopranos again and kinda loving things.
You didn't have to worry about the feng shui astrology test. It's only accurate if you're a female tulip aficionado with an extensive array of posterior instruction devices.Quote:
Originally Posted by Skiz
Also; I can't believe you're not a blue! I'd have bet money on it but it is what it is.
I'm pretty sure they kick purples out of the NRA but it looks as if you secretly disapprove of handling a cocked barrel in any case.
'Posterior instruction' devices. What a luverly euphemism. I shudder at the thought of driving lessons in Wales. :fear:Quote:
Originally Posted by manker
It also shortens your sentences like fucking fuck. I bet that took you ages to write.Quote:
Originally Posted by chavisDouble wopped is in the vicinity. However there's a double reason for that.Quote:
Originally Posted by manker
The missus kinda gets into things. Like in a big way. It's a bit frightening. She's become absolutely nagasaki'd out with getting the autistic 11 year old into the best grammar school possible. She has squeezed every available juice and rubik'd the transfer system to kingdom fucking come, believe you me. The trouble is she won't shut the fuck up about it. It's a barrage of nothing. I have to get away.
So I got this hash stuff. Haven't had hash in years. I find it rather heavy. Which rawks the fucking sawks. All I've been doing is watching the Sopranos again and kinda loving things.
Hash is all there is around my way. I have a weekly routine; my mate shares one with me, I giggle with him for 20 minutes, then we rejoin the throng, I tend toward sleep in an upright position, go outside and suck on a fag whilst deciding that everyone must have noticed my demise, drink one pint quietly and then re-integrate.
And wiminz is wiminz, I honestly don't know how they find so much to talk about regarding a single and narrow subject. Especially when they don't want advice on how to do the thing, they just want to explain every aspect of it to no discernible advantage.
It's a blessing though, obviously. The prodigy will get into an excellent school, the barrage of nothing will become a steady gleeful glow and all will be right with the world.
They're relentless like that.
Nothing to worry about so long as you take an open stance and firmly grip the shaft of your 3 wood :naughty:Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis'Posterior instruction' devices. What a luverly euphemism. I shudder at the thought of driving lessons in Wales. :fear:Quote:
Originally Posted by manker
Hey Mankpants, 'nuff Meyers-Briggs bashing! I find it quite accurate. Now you know you're a retarded ADHD-sufferring sociopathic goon with the attention span of a gnat, you can do something about it :hug:
Anyway, how did being threatened with a butt plug turn into me owning an array of anal intrusion apparatus? My bum is fine thank you very much - I'm not around 'cos I'm visiting the 'rents. I've been having cream teas in the countryside and not worrying at all about being bummed.
Chavois - women like to talk stuff through because it helps us order our thoughts and make sure they make sense. Men never doubt themselves in that way because they're massive egotists.
That's why we don't ask for advice in whatever problem we're having: you won't understand it properly. We just need you to sit there and nod in the right places :happy:
Your sentence had some syntactic issues. I attended to them. I'm happy to get paid in butt plug pictures. Please include pieces of paper with the butt plug names written on them in said pictures.Quote:
Originally Posted by Squeamous
Delighted to hear this! Fortunately, I only have to hear it once, lyke. :happy:Quote:
Originally Posted by mankerThe prodigy will get into an excellent school, the barrage of nothing will become a steady gleeful glow and all will be right with the world.Quote:
Originally Posted by chavis
:snooty:Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth CiceroYour sentence had some syntactic issues. I attended to them. I'm happy to get paid in butt plug pictures. Please include pieces of paper with the butt plug names written on them in said pictures.Quote:
Originally Posted by Squeamous
You can have them, but you'll be surgically removing them from your anus.
Sweeet. Just watched my dad prove incapable of operating the V+ box, then throw the remote at my mum who promptly worked it for him. His response? Some defensive bollocks about how everyone and thing else was wrong but him. Alpha behaviour at its finest :happy:
That's the most interesting butt plug insertion euphemism I've ever heard.Quote:
Originally Posted by Squeamous
:smilie4:
I actually get the feeling from the overall tone of his posts, that his anus is a well traveled road, and may require no surgery at all. :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by Squeamous:snooty:Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth Cicero
You can have them, but you'll be surgically removing them from your anus.
I get the same feeling. I have a strong suspicion that road requires traction devices -such as studded snow tires, or the "vehicle" will simply spin out.Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis
Scar tissue is abnormally smooth, this is a fact.
I had a friend who was run over by a tractor, it lost traction and the wheel spun on his skin. He survived but the resulting scarring was anything but smoothe. So although the tissue itself maybe smoothe the scar mass itself is anything but.Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
That's what I meant, try running him over with a smaller tractor. However, this might be the wrong vehicle for comparison, as you're all insinuating that Darth had a train run on him.Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtemisI had a friend who was run over by a tractor, it lost traction and the wheel spun on his skin. He survived but the resulting scarring was anything but smoothe. So although the tissue itself maybe smoothe the scar mass itself is anything but.Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
Here's an image for you that ticks all the boxes. Simply set up a cam on the P.T.O. of a tractor, attach a rod to the cam and then put a nice big fat dildo on the end of the rod. Then simply back the tractor upto and into Darthy and let her rip. :thumbsup:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmackyThat's what I meant, try running him over with a smaller tractor. However, this might be the wrong vehicle for comparison, as you're all insinuating that Darth had a train run on him.Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis
What kept me low and out of the blue region was surely my belief in civil rights, for better or worse, to it's core. Provided there is not infringement on someone else's day, civilians should be able to decide if they wish to do drugs in their own home, not wear seat belts, or do whatever it is that makes them them. Some of the laws on the books I whole-heartily agree with, but many of them should not be created at the federal level. Meh, Americans are apathetic voters though and seem to like the 't-shirt of the week' when visiting the polls.Quote:
Originally Posted by mankerYou didn't have to worry about the feng shui astrology test. It's only accurate if you're a female tulip aficionado with an extensive array of posterior instruction devices.Quote:
Originally Posted by Skiz
Also; I can't believe you're not a blue! I'd have bet money on it but it is what it is.
I'm pretty sure they kick purples out of the NRA but it looks as if you secretly disapprove of handling a cocked barrel in any case.
I almost always vote for the loser who gets 8% of the vote or something. My horse never wins the race. :dabs:
Sounds similar to the folklore of John Henry (only different, lyke):Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis
Quote:
John Henry is an American folk hero and tall tale. Henry worked as a "steel-driver"—a man tasked with hammering and chiseling rock in the construction of tunnels for railroad tracks. In the legend, John Henry's prowess as a steel-driver was measured in a race against a steam powered hammer, which he won only to die in victory with his hammer in his hand.
Might've sparked an image if I knew what a P.T.O. was.Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis
Power Take Off, an auxiliary drive taken off the drive train to power various implements you attach to a tractor (or some 4x4 vehicles). A P.T.O. is used for fertiliser spinners, feedout wagons, balers the forks and all sorts of uses your urban ghetto ass never dreamed of. :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmackyMight've sparked an image if I knew what a P.T.O. was.Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis
Generally, high-torque hick stuff...Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtemisPower Take Off, an auxiliary drive taken off the drive train to power various implements you attach to a tractor (or some 4x4 vehicles). A P.T.O. is used for fertiliser spinners, feedout wagons, balers the forks and all sorts of uses your urban ghetto ass never dreamed of. :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
Well yee-haw.Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtemisPower Take Off, an auxiliary drive taken off the drive train to power various implements you attach to a tractor (or some 4x4 vehicles). A P.T.O. is used for fertiliser spinners, feedout wagons, balers the forks and all sorts of uses your urban ghetto ass never dreamed of. :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
Can't help feeling that it would make for a fairly rough dildo. I mean what is the idle speed..900rpm?Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtemisPower Take Off, an auxiliary drive taken off the drive train to power various implements you attach to a tractor (or some 4x4 vehicles). A P.T.O. is used for fertiliser spinners, feedout wagons, balers the forks and all sorts of uses your urban ghetto ass never dreamed of. :blink:Quote:
Originally Posted by mjmacky
The philosophy that bequeathed 'Do what you like or do something else' :happy:Quote:
Originally Posted by SkizWhat kept me low and out of the blue region was surely my belief in civil rights, for better or worse, to it's core. Provided there is not infringement on someone else's day, civilians should be able to decide if they wish to do drugs in their own home, not wear seat belts, or do whatever it is that makes them them. Some of the laws on the books I whole-heartily agree with, but many of them should not be created at the federal level.Quote:
Originally Posted by manker
I might have paraphrased that, it was a while back.
That's one of my favourite forumular episodes evar.
Everyone knew exactly what you meant, but decided to stretch it out and misinterpret to the max for the luls.
I think it was Barbs that got that going. :pinch:
Also, my lack of religion may have helped to give me that final little hip-check I needed to get over the line.
I thought it was JP who was cunt in chief. He put it in his sig and stuff.
===
In other news; Les made two posts today, one about dildos and the other butt-plugs.
My word.