Dave's blog

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Originally Posted by manker

ITT: Arty teaches a Northern Irishman about semtex.

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:glagpinch:

He'll be handing out tarmacing tips next:smilie4:

About Tarmac I know fuck all, plastic explosive not much, I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt though that four foot of the stuff is not going to stay in a straight line, it has the same consistency as play-doh, that is where the 'plastic' part of plastic explosive comes in.

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Originally Posted by Proper Bo

He'll be handing out tarmacing tips next:smilie4:

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:schnauz:

That's the best two steroetypes gone. All I got now is potatoes :dabs:

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Originally Posted by Artemis

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Originally Posted by chavis

Only after it spends its payload.

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*Sigh, Semtex is maleable i.e. not terribly rigid, so by the time you form it into a four foot bat that is thicker at one end than the other it will tend to droop. The explosive itself does not poessess the rigidity to be a bat all by itself, unless you froze it. But then it wouldn't go bang. Well it wouldn't go bang until it defrosted and got all droopy again in about 12-16 hours depending on the time of year/how much sun you don't have that day.

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Yeah, well, the guy who sold me it said it was legit and I have no reason to doubt him. He said the bat was moulded around a reinforced copper core detonator which permitted a denser integrity.

He was the most respectable looking balaclava'd, emaciated leprechaun I've ever encountered.

I'm sure that your fantastic knob joke will eventually trickle down to the antipodes.

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Originally Posted by manker

I'm sure that your fantastic knob joke will eventually trickle down to the antipodes.

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It's almost as if he's doubting the veracity of my semtex baseball bat statement.

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Originally Posted by chavis

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Originally Posted by manker

I'm sure that your fantastic knob joke will eventually trickle down to the antipodes.

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It's almost as if he's doubting the veracity of my semtex baseball bat statement.

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I know, the cad.
I'm as shocked as you are.

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Originally Posted by manker

I wonder if all of the stalkers will be armed as thoroughly as Dave will be.
Six or eight spastics, covered with grenades and throwing stars and napalm nozzles, trying to jostle for position on a plinth.

Knowing Trafalgar Square as I do, it would be a terrific danger to the wildfowl.
I imagine Idol would hear of the pigeon plight, skateboard in, coral the spastics and then ignite them with an intense glare of pure derision.

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Which will you be, spastic 7 or 8? I might have to allocate starting positions and those bits of paper marathon runners attach to their sports vests. Since the Olympics is just around the corner I wouldn't want tourists to think we can't organise a brawl in a balustrade.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by Proper Bo

He'll be handing out tarmacing tips next:smilie4:

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:schnauz:

That's the best two steroetypes gone. All I got now is potatoes :dabs:

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Something about leprechauns?

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Originally Posted by chavis

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Originally Posted by manker

I'm sure that your fantastic knob joke will eventually trickle down to the antipodes.

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It's almost as if he's doubting the veracity of my semtex baseball bat statement.

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It's all the Davitis wafting through the lounge, it has me doubting everything, even myself. :fear: