Today an Asian man put his fingers up my bottom.

I have stomach problems you see, started around December. I get stabbing pains and such, I won't go into too much detail on that but previously I had gone to the docs and they took blood to test for IBS and something else. The tests came back ok and so I made another appointment.

It was a different doctor today, a small middle aged Asian man. I told him of my troubles and he said that I would need to see a specialist but first he just had to rule a few more things out, fair enough I said.

So he instructed me to lay on the tablebedthing and lift my shirt up, he then poked me many times - no pain from it at all. He then said ok Mr. Mulder I need you to pull your trousers down, lay on your side and bring your knees up to your chest I just need to check your back passage... I said uwotm8? He said please it will be quick. I said is there any other way? He said no you need to see the specialist and this needs to be done first. I said ok...

He put a glove on, lubed up a finger and I thought he was just gonna put the tip in but I swear he got down to the wrist and fucking hell was it painful!!! I'm no homophobe but there's no way thats enjoyable unless you have a lady bottom!!!1

I haven't told the misses.

I didn't know you were so easily cajoled. That's a lie. Yes I did.

Maybe he had a spicy lunch with that same glove previously. That might be why it hurt a lot. There's many cuisines that use spices.

Hope you're not feeling too irritable from it all. I bowel to you for having the courage to deal with it. Even braver for telling us all about your possible syndrome(s).

I'm avoiding a brothel visit until I learn how to say, "Please don't put your finger in my butt."

I think I also might prefer colon cancer over an exam.

I'd offer my sympathies, but since I have none, I'm just pointing my finger at you and snickering, and then pointing my finger some more.

I'm not sure which would be a preferable cause of arse pains.

Irritable bowel or something else.

My experience with IBS is that the bowel gets irritated rather than the person. Most times, I just experienced a tickle, like a hamster or some worms were at play/work.

You deserve all you got if you put a hamster in there.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JPaul

You deserve all you got if you put a hamster in there.

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You say that like I was being mean. I gave it a wheel; what else is expected of me?

This seems appropriate.

Attachment 171678

As Mulder would say, like anything else takes practice ; - )