I need your advice...

Ok, here's the scoop. A friend of my bf and me, wants us to join this online chatting community. (I already told her no, that it looks like a dating service and I'm not interested.)She say no its a way to meet and make new friends and not hook-up.

My bf joined today and has failed to tell me, but he has told our mutual friend who has already made 2 comments on his profile. Do you think I should confront him on this or wait it out? (he did put he is in a relationship) I found his profile by doing a search.

Here is the website:
www.myspace.com

She is claiming it is NOT a dating service just a way to make new friends.
Now you tell me do you think this is a indiscreet dating service or if it is what she claims and I am just being paranoid?

Here is a profile of a the kind of ppl on there
http://home14.myspace.com/index.cfm?...4-91c91572b0c9

To me it looks like away to "Hook-up" behind someones back, what do you guys think?

call them noobs :ermm:

oh i get it. you can't really get laid on t'internet. also, don't tell him and then you can spy on him :naughty:

A few of my friends (irl) are members of Myspace and have said to me about joining. I haven't because the whole set-up looks a bit ghey and I think I talk to them enough anyhow.

I think they're there to chat with each other and post 'witty' comments on each other's blogs. It's very music oriented and lots of bands have blogs on Myspace. I don't think your boyfriend has done anything wrong.

Sure, it can be a haven for cybering but it's mainly just a place for people to chat.

Exactly like here :lookaroun

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Originally Posted by hippychick

Ok, here's the scoop. A friend of my bf and me, wants us to join this online chatting community. (I already told her no, that it looks like a dating service and I'm not interested.)She say no its a way to meet and make new friends and not hook-up.

My bf joined today and has failed to tell me, but he has told our mutual friend who has already made 2 comments on his profile. Do you think I should confront him on this or wait it out? (he did put he is in a relationship) I found his profile by doing a search.

Here is the website:
www.myspace.com

She is claiming it is NOT a dating service just a way to make new friends.
Now you tell me do you think this is a indiscreet dating service or if it is what she claims and I am just being paranoid?

Here is a profile of a the kind of ppl on there
http://home14.myspace.com/index.cfm?...4-91c91572b0c9

To me it looks like away to "Hook-up" behind someones back, what do you guys think?

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It's probably innocent but wait it out.

He didn't tell you so you don't have to tell him that you know.

It'd be interesting to see how long he posts on there without telling you.....not that it means anything.

Stay level about it though. Unless there is crap don't bring crap.

and i came to fst cause i thought it was a dating service.
what a rip off

it looks like a pretty innocent site

Ack! Well, your instinct tells you that putting a profile up on myspace is advertising, and I have to agree. But advertising for what remains to be seen.

Your boyfriend thought it would be cool to see and be seen. Maybe he is looking for new friends, fishing for compliments or just being social...

Whatever you do, don't let your insecurities get the best of you. Talk to him about it, ask him what he is gets out of putting up a page.

My boyfriend used to send me invites to all of the friend networks that his Navy buddies had joined. At first, I was annoyed. I didn't want to join these sites!! I asked him, why??!!??? WHY?!!!? He shruggged, said he wanted to stay in touch with people.

So, I joined to see what he was up to.. I quickly found that he wasn't trolling, he really was keeping in touch with established friends and wanted to include me. Now, I join to participate and get to know his friends. :)

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Originally Posted by GepperRankins

call them noobs :ermm:

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Agreed.

what teh fook...
since when was that dump a dating crap...

i think j00 all stupid :cry:

thats my advice dont take it :cry:

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Originally Posted by VivaciousAkasha

Ack! Well, your instinct tells you that putting a profile up on myspace is advertising, and I have to agree. But advertising for what remains to be seen.

:)

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I totally agree if your in a serious relationship my would you join one of these? What do you get out of this?
I'm going to try to wait this out and see what develops if anything. It may be innocent and I am being a freeked out gf. But if he doesnt tell me soon, red flag will go up!

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Originally Posted by Hippychick

I am being a freeked out gf

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Indeed you are.

Maybe your time would be better served being concerned about women he chats to in real life, rather than worry about what interweb sites he joins. Actually, scratch that - just trust him to get on with his own life the way he wants to and stop being so possessive! Give him enough rope so if he hangs himself with it, you know it wasn't meant to be.

He has a life and doesn't need you checking up on what he's doing. Blokes hate that - yes, all of them.

i signed up for myspace yesterday

Confront him now! Absolutely NO good can come of him doing this behind your back!

Thanks for all the advice everyone. I am heading to his place tonight to see a movie. I will keep my mouth shut and see if he is honest.

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Originally Posted by chrism

Confront him now! Absolutely NO good can come of him doing this behind your back!

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You can't know that for certain.

I mean, perhaps he wants to surprise her with a foursome.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by chrism

Confront him now! Absolutely NO good can come of him doing this behind your back!

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You can't know that for certain.

I mean, perhaps he wants to surprise her with a foursome.

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If theres one thing I know for a fact, it's that what he is doing is 100% WRONG! No good will come of him sneaking around behind her back.

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Originally Posted by hippychick

Thanks for all the advice everyone. I am heading to his place tonight to see a movie. I will keep my mouth shut and see if he is honest.

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Remember what I said in the PM.


Mums the word.;)

yeah him and 3 girls, what a guy :01:

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Originally Posted by chrism

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Originally Posted by manker

You can't know that for certain.

I mean, perhaps he wants to surprise her with a foursome.

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If theres one thing I know for a fact, it's that what he is doing is 100% WRONG! No good will come of him sneaking around behind her back.

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He's not sneaking around behind her back :blink:

The chap is fully aware that Hippychick knows of the site as her friend had recently pointed it out to them as a couple. He's simply joined it.

Surely you're not insinuating that a grown man needs explicit permission off his partner to join an interweb site. That would be a bit mental in a Glenn Close stylee.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by chrism

If theres one thing I know for a fact, it's that what he is doing is 100% WRONG! No good will come of him sneaking around behind her back.

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He's not sneaking around behind her back :blink:

The chap is fully aware that Hippychick knows of the site as her friend had recently pointed it out to them as a couple. He's simply joined it.

Surely you're not insinuating that a grown man needs explicit permission off his partner to join an interweb site. That would be a bit mental in a Glenn Close stylee.

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He has not told her that he has joined. If they are in a serious relationship he needs to. There shouldn't be a problem if he's not doing anything wrong!

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Originally Posted by chrism

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Originally Posted by manker

He's not sneaking around behind her back :blink:

The chap is fully aware that Hippychick knows of the site as her friend had recently pointed it out to them as a couple. He's simply joined it.

Surely you're not insinuating that a grown man needs explicit permission off his partner to join an interweb site. That would be a bit mental in a Glenn Close stylee.

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He has not told her that he has joined. If they are in a serious relationship he needs to. There shouldn't be a problem if he's not doing anything wrong!

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She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by chrism

He has not told her that he has joined. If they are in a serious relationship he needs to. There shouldn't be a problem if he's not doing anything wrong!

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She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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So you're a member at Empornium. Who would have thunk it.

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Originally Posted by manker

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Originally Posted by chrism

He has not told her that he has joined. If they are in a serious relationship he needs to. There shouldn't be a problem if he's not doing anything wrong!

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She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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I never said She needs an in-depth manifesto of what he's doing. He's now joined a site that she has already stated to him that she's uncomfortable with. He did it without telling her. Either you're in a relationship or you're not. It's not a one way street.

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Originally Posted by chrism

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Originally Posted by manker

She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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I never said She needs an in-depth manifesto of what he's doing. He's now joined a site that she has already stated to him that she's uncomfortable with. He did it without telling her. Either you're in a relationship or you're not. It's not a one way street.

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So she is uncomfortable with the site - it's not her cup of tea.

That doesn't mean that HE won't enjoy the site and what it's got to offer.


Btw, you said that it's not a one way street - it certainly seems that way. You're saying that he HAS to do this and he MUST do that if their relationship is to work. Life is hardly ever like that and it's not usually wise to tell a partner what they can and cannot do.

A relationship like this is the biggest part of your life, but if it's the ONLY part of your life, things tend to get boring or frustrating pretty fast and the relationship doesn't last.

People don't like being controlled.

http://thetabletpc.net/CES%20Photos/...rol%20Key1.JPG

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Originally Posted by Mr JP Fugley

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Originally Posted by manker

She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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So you're a member at Empornium. Who would have thunk it.

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Hardcore wanker me, mate.

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Originally Posted by hippychick

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Originally Posted by VivaciousAkasha

Ack! Well, your instinct tells you that putting a profile up on myspace is advertising, and I have to agree. But advertising for what remains to be seen.

:)

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I totally agree if your in a serious relationship my would you join one of these? What do you get out of this?
I'm going to try to wait this out and see what develops if anything. It may be innocent and I am being a freeked out gf. But if he doesnt tell me soon, red flag will go up!

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The solution is simple. Sign up pretending to be someone else. Start chatting to your bf but don't tell him who you are, and see how far you get... :naughty:

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Originally Posted by Barbarossa

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Originally Posted by hippychick

I totally agree if your in a serious relationship my would you join one of these? What do you get out of this?
I'm going to try to wait this out and see what develops if anything. It may be innocent and I am being a freeked out gf. But if he doesnt tell me soon, red flag will go up!

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The solution is simple. Sign up pretending to be someone else. Start chatting to your bf but don't tell him who you are, and see how far you get... :naughty:

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Reminds me of that Kate Bush song 'Babushka' or whatever it was called.

Bad idea that one, asking for trouble. I think its fine for him to do what he likes, although maybe he should have mentioned it. He might have not got round to it or forgotten, or just doesn't think its important. As Hippychick is on here, she is happy to engage people of both sexes here, and its certainly not a pick up joint (although male dominated which could be problematic for a jealous partner perhaps). I think that if HC is here and its ok, then the BF can also join chatting places, without being made to feel guilty.

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Originally Posted by chrism

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Originally Posted by manker

She's his girlfriend, not his parole officer!

The notion that your partner needs an in-depth manifesto of each and every interweb site that you join is ridiculous at best, obsessive at worst.


Scuse me, luv. I've just joined Empornium.com. The reason is because if you're on the blob and don't feel like putting out, I might want a wank, like.

Too much info :shutup:

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I never said She needs an in-depth manifesto of what he's doing. He's now joined a site that she has already stated to him that she's uncomfortable with. He did it without telling her. Either you're in a relationship or you're not. It's not a one way street.

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So is the relationship a bust 'cause he didn't tell her.

If it's innocent what then? She would have raised hell over nothing. I say she keep that information to herself and move forward. She doesn't have to say anything.

Quite simple really.:ermm:

Why should he have to ask permission to join? They were both invited. He joined, she didn't. Big deal.

My partner would go batty if I asked for permission to join all the internet forums I'm on. ;) Really, you've just got to pick your battles.

:shuriken:

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Originally Posted by MagicNakor

Why should he have to ask permission to join? They were both invited. He joined, she didn't. Big deal.

My partner would go batty if I asked for permission to join all the internet forums I'm on. ;) Really, you've just got to pick your battles.

:shuriken:

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I agree totally.

My GF and me only fight over really important stuff, like who puts the kettle on, like.

signing up as someone else and chatting to him trying to get him to cheat on you is what we in the police force call entrapment. what you need to do is get over it, if you believe he is gonna cheat on you, you will become paranoid and delusional and your possesivness will drive him into the arms of an 18 year old busty beauty...ah 18 year old busty beauties. so my advice is, he signed up...deal with it.

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Originally Posted by Spider_dude

signing up as someone else and chatting to him trying to get him to cheat on you is what we in the police force call entrapment. what you need to do is get over it, if you believe he is gonna cheat on you, you will become paranoid and delusional and your possesivness will drive him into the arms of an 18 year old busty beauty...ah 18 year old busty beauties. so my advice is, he signed up...deal with it.

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I think signing up and doing that is a good idea for her. She ain't on the police force.

It's about her not him. He sure can't yell entrapment if he's busted for that.:happy:

Entrapment is ok in this situation. It's not a court case after all. He's not busyman... :dabs:


tongue in cheek btw

If a guy decides to talk to or even lightly flirt with other women, online of in real life, it's not the end of a relationship. If he takes further actions then it's a problem. Just remember that it's his own moral decision and if he does the wrong thing then he'll pay the consequences and it wasn't meant to be.

If you feel threatened by the fact that he could stray then the issue lies with yourself and your trust towards him.

Hippy,

dont worry about it.

If he wanted to get laid, he'd be going to somewhere like AdultFriendFinder, not MySpace.

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Originally Posted by Yogi

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Originally Posted by MagicNakor

Why should he have to ask permission to join? They were both invited. He joined, she didn't. Big deal.

My partner would go batty if I asked for permission to join all the internet forums I'm on. ;) Really, you've just got to pick your battles.

:shuriken:

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I agree totally.

My GF and me only fight over really important stuff, like who puts the kettle on, like.

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You sure your not a Geordie, like?

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Originally Posted by Rat Faced

Hippy,

dont worry about it.

If he wanted to get laid, he'd be going to somewhere like AdultFriendFinder, not MySpace.

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Is this the voice of experience???