Job Interview!

Yay me! I got a letter this morning telling me that I have an interview for a place in an Administration Modern Apprenticeship at Glasgow Uni (yeehaw!) :lol:

There's only 2 wee problems...

1) it's on the morning of the 21st - a very special date in all Glasgwegiens' calenders! I may be too nervous about the game to do well in the interview! It's also the day that all of my friends (Except 1 - and she's escorting me to Glasgow Uni) sit their Higher/Adv Higher Maths...I'll be worried about them!

2) I cut my right humb on a very evil can of dog food...it's making my typing very slow, but as well as a solo interview and a group interview, i have a word processing test to do...


But apart from those weeny problems, i think I've got a pretty good shot!

:D

:) Gratulations and good luck.

Aww thanks FC!

:flowers:

You're a wee sweety pie!

Another good thing I just found out - I get to go see a flat in the City Centre with My brother and his Girlfiend (we're all moving out together) and if we like it, we'll probably be moving out at the start of July! :w00t:

But shhhhhhh - don't tell my mum and dad...they won't get told until it's all finalised!

I hope you land the job, WeeMouse. ;) I once had an interviewer ask me to tell him a joke. I almost choked since most of the jokes I knew were either dirty or crude so alway keep a good, politically correct joke on hand.

Goodluck

Thanx man! Heehee i got a few crap jokes...the 2nd one's probably the best to say tho...

One day in the future, George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He
immediately goes to ... hell, where the devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I
have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you
what I'm going to do. I've got some folks here who weren't quite as bad
as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll
even let YOU decide who leaves."

Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first
room.

In it was Ronald Reagan and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and
surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in
hell.

"No," George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't
think I could do that all day long."

The devil led him to the next room. In it was Richard Nixon with a
sledge hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that
hammer, time after time after time.

"No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant
agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented George.

The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill Clinton, lying on
the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a
spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she
does best.

Bush took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this."


The devil smiled and said "OK, Monica, you're free to go."




Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of
patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness, and greets the
patient in the first bed.

The patient replies, "Fair fa' your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain
o' the puddin' race, Aboon them a' you take your place, Painch, tripe or
thairm, As lang's my airm."

Confused, Blair grins and moves on to the next patient. The second
patient responds: "Some hae meat and canna eat, And some wad eat that
want it, But we hae meat and we can eat, So let the Lord be thankit."

Even more confused, and his grin now rictus-like, the PM moves on to the
next patient, who immediately begins to chant: ¨"Wee sleekit, cowerin',
timorous beastie, Thou needna' start awa' sae hastie, Wi' bickering
brattle."

Now seriously troubled, Blair turns to the accompanying doctor and asks,
"What kind of facility is this? A mental ward?" "No," replies the
doctor. "This is the serious Burns unit."


:D

Good luck WeeMouse, Just be cool from Barry @ http://hometown.aol.co.uk/Pumpencum/...re_us_n00b.gif

:unsure: is the second one a scottish joke, because i don't get it

:D :lol: i get the first one though

ooops sorry i forgot some of you might not get it!

All of the patients are reciting Rabbie Burns, the scottish poet's work...my deputy headmaster actually told me this as I was trying to set up a coffee morning for most of the headteachers in Glasgow and I had to duck behind a table cos i was laughing/groaning so much at that joke!

removed

Ta much! :lol:


>Defense Attorney: What is your age?
>
>Little old Woman: I am 86 years old.
>
>Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to
you?
>
>Little old Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch
on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping upon the porch and
sat down beside me.
>
>Defense Attorney: Did you know him?
>
>Little old Woman: No, but he sure was friendly.
>
>Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
>
>Little old Woman: He started to rub my thigh.
>
>Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?
>
>Little old Woman: No, I didn't stop him.
>
>Defense Attorney: Why not?
>
>Little old Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner passed
away some 30 years ago.
>
>Defense Attorney: What happened next?
>
>Little old Woman: He began to rub my breasts.
>
>Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
>
>Little old Woman: No, I did not stop him.
>
>Defense Attorney: Why not?
>
>Little old Woman: Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive and
excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
>
>Defense Attorney: What happened next?
>
>Little old Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and
said to him... "Take me ...young man...Take me!"
>
>Defense Attorney: Did he take you?
>
>Little old Woman: Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!" ...And that's
when I shot the little bastard!

I know i can't tell that one, but I like it! :lol:


One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."

The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?"

The little girl replied, "My homework.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by amphoteric88@16 May 2003 - 13:37
anyway, good luck with the interview, just be calm and think before you answer, you should do ok

---

... And don't tell them you like Hanson! :lol:

:lol:

ta Bendie-baby!

If you're wearing a white shirt - don't eat chocolate ice-cream before you go to the interview... :">


My joke:

One hot sunny day a hippo strolled into a cafe and ordered a large orange juice with ice. The waiter was amazed to see a hippo and hear it talk, but served him anyway.

When the drink arrived the hippo handed the waiter a £5 note. The waiter, thinking hippos knew nothing about money gave him £1 change.

The hippo sat silently drinking his juice when he noticed the waiter staring at him.

"I'm sorry but we don't get alot of hippos in here, you know"

"At £4 a glass of orange juice i'm not surprised" replied the hippo

:lol:

me likes that!

I had my share of job interviews lately, so I know how it feels: Good luck! Et merde ( comme on dit chez nous )! :D

Another G.W Bush joke: George Bush Jr dies and goes to Heaven. At the gates sits St Peter...
St Peter: Who are you, mortal?
Bush: I'm George Walker Bush, former president of the United States!
St Peter: I'll need proof... You cannot even imagine the number of persons that try to impersonate Einstein or Picasso to enter...
Bush: Who ?
St Peter: OK, come on in...

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@16 May 2003 - 12:42
>Defense Attorney: Did he take you?
>
>Little old Woman: Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!" ...And that's
when I shot the little bastard!

---

ROFLOL!! :D

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@16 May 2003 - 12:00
Aww thanks FC!

:flowers:

You're a wee sweety pie!

Another good thing I just found out - I get to go see a flat in the City Centre with My brother and his Girlfiend (we're all moving out together) and if we like it, we'll probably be moving out at the start of July!  :w00t:

But shhhhhhh - don't tell my mum and dad...they won't get told until it's all finalised!

---

Good luck with the flat. It can be hard work juggling all the financial "balls" but at the end of the day having your own place is great. I moved out when I was 17 and although there were a few rough times over the years, it's been cool. Also, hope the job interview goes well. Keeping my fingers crossed for you! :D

Good Luck ;)

Good luck WeeMouse! I'm sure you'll do well though.

see hi to Lamsie baby from me :P :lol:

Thanx guys...

Skweeky -I'll say hi to Lamsey-baby if you say hi to Bendie-baby!

:D

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@17 May 2003 - 13:55
Thanx guys...

Skweeky -I'll say hi to Lamsey-baby if you say hi to Bendie-baby!

:D

---

...done :D


PS: Bendie-baby feels a bit awkward now :lol:

good luck! (I didnt see this before and just wanted to put in my word)

Good luck, WeeMouse! :P

Advice: leave the cheese (AND the jokes) at home!

We expect to be kept abreast of any news re: the interview. ;)

Knock 'em dead, kiddo!

Ok guys - 2 days to go and I found out something really cool!

One of my friends from school has an interview too (there's 3 places going...it's a modern apprenticeship you see!) so I'm gonna have someone I know there! Wooooohoooooo

I'm starting to get nervous tho...all the things that can go wrong are running around my head...It's not helping that my dad keeps telling me I look like a tramp when i've got my smart clothes on! :(

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@19 May 2003 - 16:20
Ok guys - 2 days to go and I found out something really cool!

One of my friends from school has an interview too (there's 3 places going...it's a modern apprenticeship you see!) so I'm gonna have someone I know there! Wooooohoooooo

I'm starting to get nervous tho...all the things that can go wrong are running around my head...It's not helping that my dad keeps telling me I look like a tramp when i've got my smart clothes on! :(

---

Be comfortable and you'll be yourself and you'll get the job :D

Good Luck Wee Mouse...

Stay cool B)

Today's the day that WeeMice have an interview.... :blink:

Me's a bit nervous...it's in 3 hours! It's half 8 just now and I've been awake since 5 :rolleyes:

I'm gonna just go for it guys - there's three jobs and I'm sure as hell going to make sure I get one!

Thanx for all your support, you mouse-lovers, you!

:)

Weemouse, you'll be fine. Its good to be nervous because you'll make more of an effort and watch what you say. Just mention this board when you first go in & they'll offer you the job on the spot! (yeah, right ;) )

Good luck :flowers:

Good luck B)

OK guys - I'm going now!

I go to meet my destiny!

:lol:

:lol: Good luck!

:lol: hehe svere burns unit































it's furny cause they're all burnt, right? :blink:

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@21 May 2003 - 11:12
OK guys - I'm going now!

I go to meet my destiny!

:lol:

---

Keeping my fingers crossed. :)

http://galleries.vinyamar.com/ps/sho...porA&ext=.jpeg
HI HO! HI HO! It's off to work she goes!

Awesome pic Clocker! :D :D

:D

hi guys! just back! the interview went really well - it was actually quite fun! my interviewer was laughing her head off cos she asked me why I wanted to work at Glasgow Uni and i replied (thoughtfully) "well...it looks like Hogwarts castle. I could tell everyone that i worked in Hogwarts..."

I know I'm strange! i think me + my friend Steven stand a really good chance of getting in cos everyone else there were neds!

:)
Thanks for the support guys! I'll tell you if i get a 2nd interview.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by WeeMouse@21 May 2003 - 15:26
"well...it looks like Hogwarts castle. I could tell everyone that i worked in Hogwarts..."

---

:lol: :lol: :lol:




But seriously: that could have done the trick; they like people that don't take themselves too serious in job interviews and can laugh with themselves. ;)
The fact that the other candidates were neds will help too. :D

Good Luck WeeMouse. I hope the job and new flat all work out for you. :flowers: :"> :-"

thanx oldmancan and bender!

you two can come over for my house-warming party!

:D

Congrats! :flowers:

http://www.aeb.org/recipes/images/ny-cheesecake.jpg

And cheeeze cake!



And while you were gone..... I got stars!

Quote:

---

Another good thing I just found out - I get to go see a flat in the City Centre with My brother and his Girlfiend (we're all moving out together) and if we like it, we'll probably be moving out at the start of July!

---

Mate, if i were you i'd move up the westend, somewhere near Byres Road. I've lived up here for years and love it. I'm sure you know, it's Hillhead- the studenty part. There's a really nice atmosphere up here and...... fewer neds. The city centre's great, but not to live in- although merchant city is ok....

If you wait another month before getting a place, a lot of the students will have moved out of their flats. You'll then be able to get somewhere no bother. Don't go through a letting agent, they're very expensive; take a walk down Byres Road and look in the window of the newsagent halfway down the hill on the left. There you'll find loads of flats advertised.

Believe me (although i'm a complete stranger ;) ) the west IS best.