New Official E.u. Language

The European Union commissioners have announced that agreement has been
reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European
communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As
part of the negotiations, the British government conceded that English
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year
phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short).

In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c". Sertainly,
sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard "c" will
be replaced with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but
typewriters kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
> troublesome "ph" will be replaced by "f". This will make words like
"fotograf" 20 per sent shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the
horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is disgrasful, and they would
go.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing "th" by "z" and "w" by " v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan b e dropd from vords
kontaining "ou", and similar changes vud of kurs be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking
German like zey vunted in ze forst place!!!

Although I've seen it many times before, it's humourous, but really j2k4, it's not three posts worth of humourous. ;)

:ninja:

Quote:

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Originally posted by MagicNakor@28 June 2003 - 04:02
Although I've seen it many times before, it's humourous, but really j2k4, it's not three posts worth of humourous. ;)

:ninja:

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'Twas a tragic occurrence.

I was waiting patiently for the board to cooperate (it was being "sticky") and wasn&#39;t aware of the extent it would go to appease me. <_<

My apologies, and thanks to whichever mod attended the problem for me. :)

Sertainly, it&#39;s very humurus j2k4. I wuldn&#39;t say komical, but very humurus. Maybe yu kan zen tell the popl abut Euro-filosofy next ven yu kan ;)

Quote:

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Originally posted by Illuminati@28 June 2003 - 15:03
Sertainly, it&#39;s very humurus j2k4.&nbsp; I wuldn&#39;t say komical, but very humurus.&nbsp; Maybe yu kan zen tell the popl abut Euro-filosofy next ven yu kan ;)

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ze filosofy expozay vil be publist next vek.

I should note-if the board hadn&#39;t crapped out on me, there would not have been 4 (FOUR) editions of this post, and the one that made it to the board would have been properly credited as an adjunct to an e-mail I received from my cousin in Napoli.

:lol: :lol: :o :huh:
Are you serious?
Are they really gonna do that?
I&#39;m shocked that the English of all people would accept something like this.
English professors the world over must be cringing at the very thought of this.
My sensibilities are offended and I&#39;m just your average dude. :lol:
Do you think the Germans are pissed we didn&#39;t choose it as our official language and their tired of coming in second.
I can&#39;t remember the vote exactly, but I think it was pretty close.

Btw j2 that was an excellent presentation.
Very funny too&#33;

No. ;) I have an older version of this same one with a somewhat different beginning.

:ninja:

Quote:

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Originally posted by ShockAndAwe^i^@28 June 2003 - 23:20
:lol: :lol: :o :huh:
Are you serious?
Are they really gonna do that?
I&#39;m shocked that the English of all people would accept something like this.
English professors the world over must be cringing at the very thought of this.
My sensibilities are offended and I&#39;m just your average dude. :lol:
Do you think the Germans are pissed we didn&#39;t choose it as our official language and their tired of coming in second.
I can&#39;t remember the vote exactly, but I think it was pretty close.

Btw j2 that was an excellent presentation.
Very funny too&#33;

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Regretfully, I cannot claim credit; as MN says, it has been around for awhile.

I thought it deserved a requiem due to recent events. :)

Quote:

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Originally posted by ShockAndAwe^i^
I&#39;m shocked that the English of all people would accept something like this.

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After having to accept American &#39;English&#39; we can accept just about anything.

Quote:

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Originally posted by evilbagpuss@30 June 2003 - 21:41


After having to accept American &#39;English&#39; we can accept just about anything.

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Excellent&#33;

Wait till you see what we have planned for you next...

it&#39;s almost like an adoption of the spelling used on the internet, in some ways it is entirely pointless considering all of the books written with the standard arcane english spelling, but then again we still study shakespeare despite his unruly spelling [his having written before the institution of elizabeth&#39;s &#39;queens english&#39;]
and americanese is fairly easy to understand, i wonder if it will work :unsure:

SOUN EVRIBODI OUIL SPIQ FRAINCH &#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33; :lol:

HA&#33; HA&#33; HA&#33; Voila , c&#39;est la vie. Kind of Deja vu madame?

C&#39;est improbable. Too many people are content with speaking only one language, and in the case of English speakers, not even very well at that.

:ninja:

Im to use to American English.....that other stuff is to confusing for me, because i&#39;ve already learned to spell almost every word in American English.

Unfortunately not the grammar aspect, though. ;)

:ninja:

Tres picky, MN.

Quote:

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Originally posted by clocker@29 July 2003 - 23:16
Tres picky, MN.

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Remember: that&#39;s what we like about MN, Clocker. :)

I think all three of us have a picky streak; could you imagine if we were mods? We&#39;d resemble nothing more than a klatch of old Jewish tea-hens.


Sorry to have given such free rein to my anti-PCism. :P

Well, I will admit to occasionally letting my inner schoolmarm run rampant, but I thought that we had decided that we liked MN because he knew so much about the Crusades.

Did I miss a meeting?

Hmmmmmmm...

Maybe I did- :huh:

MN-the attendence book, please? :)

He&#39;s checking.

This may take a moment.
http://www.softassteel.com/eileenwil...ges/scribe.jpg

You can read it for yourselves, gentlemen.

http://www.suffolkcc.gov.uk/sro/sro6a.gif

I was always under the impression it was for both of those things, but above all things, my sense of propriety. ;)

:ninja:

Yes, &#39;tis true, MN.

I propose we meet again as soon as current outside obligations are discharged; say, the end of August? B)

We have ignored our duties for too long. :D