Real Horror-scopes - Who You Really Are.

Printable View

09-03-2003, 02:01 PM
Billy_Dean

Real Horror-scopes - who you really are....

Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk.

Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.

Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are
a general dipshit.

Taurus (April 23 - May 22) You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned communist.

Gemini (May 23 - June 22) You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving
on incest.

Cancer (June 23 - July 22) You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.
Everyone in prison is a Cancer.

Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving motherfuckers and
enjoy masturbation more than sex.

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras
die of venereal disease.

Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most
Scorpios are murdered.

Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22) You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of shit.

Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.

Thanx to Ella for these.

;)
09-03-2003, 02:46 PM
ilw

:lol: :lol: :lol:
09-03-2003, 03:22 PM
Bender

Quote:

Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk.

Now I know why they made me Mod. :D
09-03-2003, 04:32 PM
TheDave

Quote:

Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.

:lol: thats definatly me
09-03-2003, 08:09 PM
sabbath

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 16:01
Cancer (June 23 - July 22) You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.
Everyone in prison is a Cancer.

I always knew sth was wrong with me...
09-03-2003, 10:42 PM
Ella

Hahaha...thanks BD baby...13th September, people! That's the only day of the year I fall asleep while fucking. Really. :blink:
09-03-2003, 11:34 PM
callum

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 15:01
There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.

:lol:
09-04-2003, 03:16 AM
Jay

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 15:01
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most
Scorpios are murdered.

now thats what i calll a horrorscope
09-04-2003, 03:19 AM
MUSLEMAN

Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.

Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are
a general dipshit.
and i though it was cool that i have 2 signs
:o :huh: :angry: :( :lol: :lol: :lol:
09-04-2003, 03:51 AM
MediaSlayer

Quote:

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

That hit waaay to close to home! I demand a mod censor your initial post to lessen the "pedantic factor" of the virgo description!!!
09-04-2003, 04:12 AM
NikkiD

Quote:

Gemini (May 23 - June 22) You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving
on incest.

Apparently someone's been spying on me and Skweeky in chat again... uh I mean this is really off... I'm not like that at all... :lol: :lol: :lol:
09-04-2003, 04:20 AM
Suicyco247

How did you know, I didn't want anyone to know.

Quote:

Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are
a general dipshit.

There goes my run for president....OF THE WORLD!!!!
09-04-2003, 04:24 AM
MUSLEMAN

Quote:

Originally posted by Suicyco247@4 September 2003 - 00:20
How did you know, I didn't want anyone to know.

Quote:

Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are
a general dipshit.

There goes my run for president....OF THE WORLD!!!!

you can say that again :lol:
09-04-2003, 05:55 AM
bowrabob

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 14:01
Real Horror-scopes - who you really are....

Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk.

Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.

Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are
a general dipshit.

Taurus (April 23 - May 22) You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned communist.

Gemini (May 23 - June 22) You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving
on incest.

Cancer (June 23 - July 22) You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.
Everyone in prison is a Cancer.

Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving motherfuckers and
enjoy masturbation more than sex.

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras
die of venereal disease.

Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most
Scorpios are murdered.

Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22) You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of shit.

Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.

Thanx to Ella for these.

;)

Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras
die of venereal disease. Difficulty dealing with reality....that's why I take drugs........If you are male you are probaly queer.....I'm not, my boyfriend is........now you mention it my dick is a bit drippy.
09-04-2003, 07:48 AM
ang3968

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@4 September 2003 - 00:01
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

bus driver???????????????
09-04-2003, 07:57 AM
MUSLEMAN

he put up a good one i love this thread :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
09-04-2003, 09:44 AM
Ella

Quote:

Originally posted by MediaSlayer@4 September 2003 - 13:51

Quote:

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

That hit waaay to close to home! I demand a mod censor your initial post to lessen the "pedantic factor" of the virgo description!!!

So, as one Virgo to the other, can you say that's the only part of the horror-scope that was close to home? I'm a pedantic fucker but I've never fallen asleep while fucking. I've had someone fall asleep on me but that's another story... :ph34r:
09-04-2003, 09:51 AM
Billy_Dean

Sorry about that Ella, it must have been that date rape drug you slipped me!!

;)
09-04-2003, 10:13 AM
cowswithguns

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 14:01

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) You are the logical type and hate disorder. Your nit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus
drivers and pimps.

Looks like I'm a pimp 'cos I aint a bloody bus driver!

As far as the falling asleep while fucking.......well........I never did believe I was a typical Virgo. Ella, I've had a few fall asleep on me too....no bloody stamina LOL
09-04-2003, 10:26 AM
Ella

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@4 September 2003 - 19:51
Sorry about that Ella, it must have been that date rape drug you slipped me!!

;)

Well, you should have never taken your eyes off the ball, BD baby... B)

And Cowsy...I've had a few fall asleep on me as well...but "on top"? Bah - fucking wimps!!
09-04-2003, 11:27 AM
JONNO_CELEBS

I ain't never fallen asleep in the middle, never could figure how people can?? :blink:
Had the drunk thing where I could'nt finish :blink: ........did'nt get any complaints though cos I was like a rabbit on heat for over an hour and a half :rolleyes: but I never crossed the finish line :rolleyes: :(

Quote:

Cancer (June 23 - July 22) You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.
Everyone in prison is a Cancer.

Oh yeah, and thanks for that :(
Me not worth a shit :(

Jonno B)
09-04-2003, 02:01 PM
thewizeard

I wonder what the star sign is from the person who wrote this!!

Mine is:-Taurus (April 23 - May 22) You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned communist.
09-04-2003, 09:07 PM
Beast

Quote:

Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.

Any more capricorns out there want to play Lemming with me?
09-04-2003, 09:16 PM
RGX

Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22) You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of shit.

Most of thats true :D

Im drunk alot, rely on luck alot, and am optomisitic and enthusiastic!

Not too keen on the lack of talent and the worthless piece of shit thing though :rolleyes:
09-05-2003, 12:25 AM
tartanfruitfly

If'n I had any sort'a' idea when a' was born...
09-05-2003, 12:33 AM
Lilmiss

Quote:

Originally posted by Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 14:01

Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most
Scorpios are murdered.

wha? :blink:
moi?
09-05-2003, 11:02 AM
Billy_Dean

You are a worthless piece of shit.

Well at least they got some of it right!

B)
09-05-2003, 01:06 PM
JONNO_CELEBS

Quote:

Originally posted by lilmiss+5 September 2003 - 00:33--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (lilmiss @ 5 September 2003 - 00:33)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Billy_Dean@3 September 2003 - 14:01

Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most
Scorpios are murdered.

wha? :blink:
moi? [/b][/quote]
No no, this is totally wrong lilmiss :)

Here's your real one>>>

Quote:

You are a kind caring person with a fantastic sense of humor. You will do great things in your life cos you have the strength to succeed.
You are very atractive person in more ways than one and love to get stoned :P

See, I should do this stuff, it's easy :D

Jonno B)