Chavs - They're Real and They're in my Pub

I thought they were only allowed on street corners, now you have to play doubles against them in order to have a game of pool with your mates. Last night there were about 20 of them in my pub's pool room :angry:

One of them had pedal pusher things on :angry: :angry:

King chav (pictured) brought in some kind of musical apparatus which was louder than the juke box! The landlord made him turn it off but when it got busy they put it back on, what next? I dread to think.

Clearly they can't handle proper beer because when their bottles of Thunderbird and 20/20 ran out they weer forced into buying Stella, this got them very pissed, very quickly. One of the minor chavs passed out in the toilet, face down in the urinal according to one of my (non-chav) mates. Wish I'd got a pic of that but I did manage to snap the aftermath.

http://img25.exs.cx/img25/13/picture002466sl.jpg King chav.

http://img16.exs.cx/img16/1972/picture002477tt.jpg King chav's pedal pusher things.

http://img16.exs.cx/img16/4234/picture002483mk.jpg Chav congregation.

http://img16.exs.cx/img16/3919/picture002537ue.jpg Pissed up chav

http://img16.exs.cx/img16/5162/picture002548lr.jpg They dragged him outside and left him on the pavement :ohmy:




If you've got any pictures of chavs inside pubs, please to be posting them. I am appalled but slightly intruiged by this phenomenon.

Chavs are taking over the UK :(

Did they steal the pool que by any chance Manker? Some wanker did that at my local Pub.

Also use a decoy to get rid of them, say theres an old lady with £20 outside defensless that usually does the job.

Why the **** is he wearing shorts in the winter? :blink:

:lol: so funny that they dumped their pissed mate on the pavement outside though

What kind of brainless twat steals a manky (no offence Manker) pub cue? They're not even sturdy enough for kicking off.

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Originally Posted by Peerzy

Chavs are taking over the UK :(

Did they steal the pool que by any chance Manker? Some wanker did that at my local Pub.

Also use a decoy to get rid of them, say theres an old lady with £20 outside defensless that usually does the job.

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That's not a bad idea :dry:

I'm not sure if they nicked a pool cue but one of them definitely nicked an ashtray. I saw one of them empty it out and put it into his chavette's handbag. They're a disease.

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Originally Posted by Chewie UK

What kind of brainless twat steals a manky (no offence Manker) pub cue? They're not even sturdy enough for kicking off.

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Don't ask me, they were minors as well :ohmy: like 16-17, they were being forced out the pub (underaged drinking) and they grabbed the cue and ran....

Ha-****ing-ha :dry: :dry:

at least he empited it first

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Originally Posted by DanB

at least he empited it first

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:lol: :lol: :lol:

I get 'em in my pub too. :no:


Yup, not a lot you can do about those chav's when they start multiplying and infesting themselves in public houses. Our breed drink Ribena, or Snakebite for the older ones, and rip up all my beer mats. They also listen to Keane and Oasis on a loop on the jukebox, much to my annoyance.


Hopefully the Government will release their Anti-Chav stun gun soon, but til then we are forced to be amongst them.


Hope they dont carry fleas or rabies. :unsure:

Has someone hijacked Peerzy's account?

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Originally Posted by Withcheese

Has someone hijacked Peerzy's account?

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You noticed the lack of typos too? :unsure:


Perhaps its Peerzys new years resolution :huh:

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Originally Posted by DanB

You noticed the lack of typos too? :unsure:


Perhaps its Peerzys new years resolution :huh:

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I just think manker is getting forgetful of which account he's logged in as.

Jonno. :cool:

Better edit before rossco sees it. :ph34r:

Are you the one with or without the hat manker. :lol:

no problem, who's getting wasted tonight? just me then, 8.5% hoegaarden

eeew, hoegarden is nasty

Yuck, we used to serve Hoegarden at the Hogshead.

I still have about a million Hoegarden pint glasses that I nicked. :chav:

Hoegarden pint glasses rawk, I used to have one too. Not being a chav I think I bought mine tho' http://www.sighost.us/members/danb/snooty.gif :yeahright:

Effy, I'm not in the pics - I couldn't get too close as the glare from the shit gold was deadly :ermm:

yeah yeah, we know it was you in teh pedal pushers things :dry:

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Originally Posted by DanB

yeah yeah, we know it was you in teh pedal pushers things :dry:

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:D

For real, I don't think I've ever seen that particular brand of chavgear before tho' - 3/4 length shell suit bottoms :blink:

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Originally Posted by manker

:D

For real, I don't think I've ever seen that particular brand of chavgear before tho' - 3/4 length shell suit bottoms :blink:

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True, I don't think I have seen them before.

Maybe he had just stolen a childs pair from the shop? :unsure:

i got a new keyboard :D . This one has a working T and working A key :lol:

Only problem is iv already gone and spilt some Fosters on the arrow keys so now when i push them down they stay down :awwwshit:

A plea from the (poor, beknighted) American contingent....

What the hell is a "chav"?

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Originally Posted by clocker

A plea from the (poor, beknighted) American contingent....

What the hell is a "chav"?

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It's like a Scottish "NED", you ignoramus!

Definition from urbandictionary for my un-enlightened North American friends:

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Originally Posted by Adman

Chav :- Cheltenham Average
More common than flys around shit, often wear burberry and are mistaken for intelligent life. Many of these sub-speiced humaniods gather around sertain locations about the towns and cities of Gloustershire, the most common of all locations is McDonalds. Easily spotted, look for fake gold, the ord Nike on clothing. Listen for the mispronouciation of childs words.

e.g isn't it, this is spoken as innit, and Friend becomes mush, or bruv, though many of them say they could "fukin batter ya" most of them couldn't even batter a fish. To spot a chav, be it male or female, (there is very little difference between the two) look for hair that is shorter than freshly cut grass, the inability to grow over 5 ft and the lack of education. If approuched by one of these humaniod Twats, simply reply with a smart comment or use a big word, such as car, or bus, or floor, mostly they will become confused and walk off, in rare occasions the have been known to attempt to harm people to little effect. It is well known that chavs have little or no friends, just a "crew" of mockly idiotic fools with brand name clothes and there trousers tucked into there socks, also see pikey or townie

Do not be fooled by there Humanoid looks, they are of another race, mainly scum
For the greater good of the World, Legalise Chav hunting. Grab a gun, first one to 50 burberry hats gets a Metallica CD!!

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Source: Adman, Mar 30, 2004

I`m led to beleive it stands for,

Council
House
Adult
Vermin

So manker told me. :lol: :lol:

Check out sheppeyscum.com for more info on the phenominom

SGG informs me that NED stands for Non-Educated Delinquent.

If the shoe fits as they say. :rolleyes:

i am sorry big les but ned isn't an anacronym its an old coal miners word, people in the last few years have tried to equate it with nod educated delinquent because that is basically what it is, but, it's not if that makes sense?

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Originally Posted by manker

:DFor real, I don't think I've ever seen that particular brand of chavgear before tho' - 3/4 length shell suit bottoms :blink:

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they're common here in the US, pretty fugly to me :rolleyes:

but i had some punks get my 'pub' (we call it a 'bar', here in the US) busted by the freakin ATF, turns out they had fake IDs <_<

luckily i wasn't there that night...no fake ID :lol: just friends with the owner :D

Chavs=Ghey?

Peace bd

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Originally Posted by manker

Definition from urbandictionary for my un-enlightened North American friends:

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also see pikey or townie

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Source: Adman, Mar 30, 2004

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My daughter and her friend retorted "pikey" with this exact meaning to some girls (adorned in classic chav equipment) that had called them"grungers", then they were followed and attacked. The chavettes found out where we live and came rounnd with a lump of cement to kick off but met Mrs Chewie, who swung at one (missing) and the police were called because she was 14... and we were accused of racially abusing them ("pikey"!)... after 9 months the third court visit resulted in the magistrates throwing out the assault charge on my wife.
****ing bitches.

I'm sitting in an internet cafe surrounded by chavs. Now it makes sense about those monkeys typing writing the works of Shakespeare....

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Originally Posted by Chewie UK

My daughter and her friend retorted "pikey" with this exact meaning to some girls (adorned in classic chav equipment) that had called them"grungers", then they were followed and attacked. The chavettes found out where we live and came rounnd with a lump of cement to kick off but met Mrs Chewie, who swung at one (missing) and the police were called because she was 14... and we were accused of racially abusing them ("pikey"!)... after 9 months the third court visit resulted in the magistrates throwing out the assault charge on my wife.
fucking bitches.

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The world has gone mad. I was once accused of being intolerant because I regurgitated a Monty Python scene with some friends about burning witches - on the interweb :blink:

It is bad about your daughter getting followed like that but at least justice was done - and fair play to Mrs. Chewie :01:

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Originally Posted by Spider_dude

i am sorry big les but ned isn't an anacronym its an old coal miners word, people in the last few years have tried to equate it with nod educated delinquent because that is basically what it is, but, it's not if that makes sense?

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Yes it makes sense. I think she knows that, she just prefers the new acronym. :shifty: