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Thread: 5 Corporate Lessons

  1. #1
    Skiz's Avatar (_8(I)
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    This is obviously a copy/paste from an email. Sorry if it comes out a bit screwy.


    >> A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing
    >>up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
    >> The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
    >>
    >> When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door
    >>neighbor.
    >>
    >> Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop
    >>that towel,"
    >>
    >> After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and
    >>stands naked in front of Bob.
    >>
    >> After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves.
    >>
    >> The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
    >>
    >> When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was
    >>that?"
    >>
    >> "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
    >>
    >> "Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800
    >>he owes me?"
    >>
    >> Moral of the story: If you share critical information
    >>pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you
    >>may be in a position to
    >> prevent avoidable exposure.
    >>
    >> Corporate Lesson 2:
    >>
    >> A priest offered a lift to a Nun.
    >>
    >> She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a
    >>leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
    >>
    >> After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her
    >>leg.
    >>
    >> The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
    >>
    >> The priest removed his hand.
    >>
    >> But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
    >>
    >> The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
    >>
    >> Priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
    >>
    >> Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
    >>
    >> On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm
    >>129.
    >>
    >> It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
    >>
    >> Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job,
    >>you might miss a great opportunity.
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >> Corporate Lesson 3:
    >>
    >> A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are
    >>walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.
    >>
    >> They rub it and a Genie comes out.
    >>
    >> The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."
    >>
    >> "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk.
    >>
    >> "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a
    >>care in the world."
    >>
    >> Poof! She's gone.
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >> "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in
    >>Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless
    >>supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life."
    >>
    >> Poof! He's gone.
    >>
    >> "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.
    >>
    >> The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after
    >>lunch."
    >>
    >> Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >> Corporate Lesson 4:
    >>
    >> A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
    >>
    >> A rabbit asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all
    >>day long?"
    >>
    >> The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
    >>
    >> So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
    >>
    >> A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
    >>
    >> Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must
    >>be sitting very high up.
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >> Corporate Lesson 5:
    >>
    >> A turkey was chatting with a bull.
    >>
    >> "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,"
    >>sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the energy."
    >>
    >> "Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull.
    >>
    >> They're packed with nutrients."
    >>
    >> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him
    >>enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
    >>
    >> The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the
    >>second branch.
    >>
    >>
    >> Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at
    >>the top of the tree.
    >>
    >> Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the
    >>tree.
    >>
    >> Moral of the story: Bullshėt might get you to the top, but it
    >>won't keep you there.



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  2. Funny S**t   -   #2

  3. Funny S**t   -   #3
    cool morals

  4. Funny S**t   -   #4
    Skiz's Avatar (_8(I)
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    Quote Originally Posted by blue_1
    WOW. Great post.



    ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ
    The FST Last.fm group

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