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Thread: The general public...

  1. #1
    clocker's Avatar Shovel Ready
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    ....has a four year old PC and has no idea what size/ how full the hard drive is.

    ....isn't sure what OS they are using. "Windows?"

    ....never backs up anything and has no idea where they saved their precious .doc files.

    ....is ALWAYS shocked and amazed when their PC fails to start.

    ....can't be bothered to figure out their software and defaults to calling someone else to bail them out.

    ....is sure that the pimply 13 year old next door can "make Windows run better".

    ....will randomly delete files to "clean up the PC".

    ....thinks AOL actually works.

    ....has at least one "New Folder" filled with porn.

    ....will attempt to "upgrade" their Win98 Gateway with the neighbor's Dell XP Restore disk.

    ....will try to plug their iPod into anything.

    ....is sure that Word is part of Windows.

    ....really misses 98, hates XP and wants a Mac cause they're "easier".

    ....has never been to Windows Update.

    ....can't get on the internet.

    ....thinks three AV programs must be better than just one.

    ....is amazed that their thirteen year old son has Googled "tits".

    ....is pretty sure that someone is "hacking" their computer to steal valuable information.

    ....will destroy a Dell "accordian" case trying to replace the modem.


    And the list goes on.
    "I am the one who knocks."- Heisenberg

  2. Software & Hardware   -   #2
    peat moss's Avatar Software Farmer BT Rep: +15BT Rep +15BT Rep +15
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    Can I add , screwing the mobo by trying to add the wrong memory strip .

  3. Software & Hardware   -   #3
    Barbarossa's Avatar mostly harmless
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    Can I add:

    ....Just because someone works for a software company they can fix printers when they stop working.

  4. Software & Hardware   -   #4
    S!X's Avatar L33T Member BT Rep: +5
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    Quote Originally Posted by clocker View Post
    ....has at least one "New Folder" filled with porn.
    I happen to be one of those people

  5. Software & Hardware   -   #5
    Chewie's Avatar Chew E. Bakke
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    Quote Originally Posted by clocker View Post
    ....has at least one "New Folder" filled with porn.
    ...has empty New Folders all over the bloody place.

    ...has 500+ viruses named after scene releases in their limewire incomplete folder.

    ...only wants it to go on the internet but will complain when they install Call Of Duty 2 and it runs like shit.

    ...uses Windows Firewall but has never heard of it.

    ...has Spybot and AdAware installed.

    ...would find 200+ undesirable files if they actually updated and scanned with Spybot and AdAware.

    ...has Microsoft, Google, Yahoo and Mysearch toolbars installed.

    ...thinks the AOL spyware scanner is actually doing something.

    ...is worried after catching their son downloading pictures of naked women.

    ...is shocked when you tell them to relax 'cos they're not pictures of naked men.
    There isn't a bargepole long enough for me to work on [a Sony Viao] - clocker 2008

  6. Software & Hardware   -   #6
    zapjb's Avatar Computer Abuser BT Rep: +3
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    Will say after you fixed their hosed system. And taught them how to update & scan with security software.

    "This will take care of itself from now on. And I can use my computer like before."


  7. Software & Hardware   -   #7
    tesco's Avatar woowoo
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    ...thinks you actually need shortcuts (to make the program work i'm assuming ).

    ...doesn't understand that deleting a few MP3s won't stop a BSOD from appearing.

  8. Software & Hardware   -   #8
    clocker's Avatar Shovel Ready
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    ....has never defragged a drive.

    ....cannot export their Contacts from Outlook.

    ....calls their PC "the modem".

    ....wants to play Doom3 on Windows ME.

    ....doesn't realize you can see their internet surfing history.

    ....calls a Zone Alarm popup an "error message".

    ....will "press any key to boot from CD" until Hell freezes over.

    ....thinks you like working on their computer.

    ....always has "one more question".

    ....will invariably introduce themselves as "computer illiterate".

    ....thinks ctrl+alt+del is magic.

    ....considers Kim Kommando a genius.

    ....hates Bill Gates.
    "I am the one who knocks."- Heisenberg

  9. Software & Hardware   -   #9
    Tempestv's Avatar Engineer
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    saves everything to their desktop

    Thinks the wifi on their laptop will pickup the wireless internet signal from their ISP

    has adaware, MSN instant messenger, McAffee, Norton, and about five other programs start on windows startup, despite the fact that they don't use these programs

    spends $1000 on a new computer yet can not remember a single specification on the computer they spend so much for

    actually needs color coding on the computer ports to tell them how to hook up the computer

    thinks that a custom configured dell and a custom build computer are the same thing

    thinks that they actually know a lot about computers becuase they have never used their cd drive as a cup holder
    Plan for the worst, hope for the best

  10. Software & Hardware   -   #10
    FreeDoom's Avatar Obsessed By Cruelty
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    ....will attempt to "upgrade" their Win98 Gateway with the neighbor's Dell XP Restore disk.
    hahhahha priceless

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