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Thread: One for the ladies

  1. #1
    hippychick's Avatar Memo, what memo? BT Rep: +5
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    One day my housework-challenged husband decided
    to wash his Sweat- shirt. Seconds after he stepped
    into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What
    setting do I use on the washing machine?"




    "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your
    shirt?"
    He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma ."

    And they say blondes are dumb...
    -------- ---------------------------------------------------
    A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
    "I am going to make you the happiest
    woman in the world."
    The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack
    says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey,
    what do you think the neighbors would think if
    I mowed the lawn like this?"




    "Probably that I married you for your money,"
    she replied.
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
    She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the
    ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking,
    sensitive man?
    A: A rumor
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were
    celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On
    their special day a good fairy came to them and
    said that because they had been so good that
    each one of them could have one wish.




    The wife wished for a trip around the world
    with her husband.

    Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise
    tickets in her hands.
    The man wished for a female companion
    30 years younger...
    Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!
    Gotta love that fairy!
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Dear Lord,
    I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
    Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods.
    Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat
    him to death.




    AMEN
    -----------------------------


    Q: Why do little boys whine?
    A: They are practicing to be men.
    ----------------------------------------
    Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
    A: Trustworthy.
    -----------------------------------------
    Q: What does it mean when a man is in
    your bed gasping for breath and calling
    your name?
    A: You did not hold the pillow down
    long enough.
    ---------------------------------------
    Q: Why do men whistle when they are
    sitting on the toilet?
    A: It helps them remember which end
    they need to wipe.
    --------------------------------------
    Q: How do you keep your husband from
    reading your e-mail?
    A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction
    Manuals"

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    Poster BT Rep: +25BT Rep +25BT Rep +25BT Rep +25BT Rep +25
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    Dec 2005
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    lol nice one

  3. Funny S**t   -   #3
    hdooga's Avatar ANTI-TRADER BT Rep: +4
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    Oct 2006
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    113
    Some of it was too true... But id never fart on the sofa

  4. Funny S**t   -   #4
    jaum's Avatar )-0-0-( BT Rep: +35BT Rep +35BT Rep +35BT Rep +35BT Rep +35BT Rep +35BT Rep +35
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    Sep 2006
    Posts
    489
    good one

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