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Thread: Is This Expense Justified?

  1. #1
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    I don't like unnecessary chores!

    The bit with the lawn mower is cool but I don't like the tricky time consuming edges and borders and other obstacles, the rakin and grass collection, sweeping of the pathway, weedin and all that jazz.

    So I have just invested in the laying of some Astro Turf, (that's plastic grass&#33. It's durable, hardwearing, always healthy looking - so no panics if there's is a hose pipe ban!

    It won't die in a drought and it won't be killed off by even the harshest winter.

    The neighbours don't realise what's goin on - one even commented today on how lush my lawn was lookin and wanted to know my secret! lol!

    To throw everyone completely off the scent I have also purchased an Astro Turf Lawnmower!

    To be honest I was really fucked off about this purchase! I got the thing out of the box and found it has exactly the same appearance as a Flymo Hover Mower, only difference being a real nasty lookin cheap sticker with the word "Astro" stuck partially over the Flymo label, only other difference is, it has no blade! This b*stard thing was four time the price of a Flymo!

    Still I've got it now - so once a fortnight I will go through the pretence of mowing me lawn.

    What do you think cool or just plain f*ckin dumb?

    Discuss
    <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:red'>Mr Hand&#39;s Busy Right Now&#33; So Talk To Mr FOOKIN FINGER&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;</span></span>

  2. Lounge   -   #2
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    Why don&#39;t we all just pave over nature altogether&#33;

  3. Lounge   -   #3
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    Way cool, cuz now you can paint some lines & stuff on it, build a dome over it and sell it to the next major league baseball team looking for a home field&#33;
    And....you get to be the official groundscrew cuz, like....it&#39;s your lawn, man &#33;

  4. Lounge   -   #4
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    Originally posted by Somebody1234@25 June 2003 - 18:03
    Why don&#39;t we all just pave over nature altogether&#33;
    I did exam this cheaper option. However I really do love nature and sh*t and I concluded that paving slabs in place of a lawn are just a little drab.

    <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:red'>Mr Hand&#39;s Busy Right Now&#33; So Talk To Mr FOOKIN FINGER&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;</span></span>

  5. Lounge   -   #5
    Lilmiss's Avatar Poster BT Rep: +4
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    fugley has more money than sense - discuss.

    next essay; fugley has more hair than sense - discus...ting.

    should&#39;ve bought a cow fugs, then you would only have to pick up cow-pats.
    They can tak' oour lives, but they cannae tak' oour troousers!
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    Last edited by Alien5; Today at 12:51

  6. Lounge   -   #6
    crazy_billy_bats's Avatar Poster
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    Cutting one own&#39;s lawn is a downright tradition - Sundays especially.

    The end of this is the downfall of society as we know it - what else will fat bastards do on Sundays? The obesity question therefore comes in to play.

    Wise your ass up before you make wild suggestions about your horticultural activities.

  7. Lounge   -   #7
    Astro-Turf is NOT fun when you do a sliding-tackle playing football. On normal grass you get a grass-stain, on astro-turf you get a blood-stain usually.

    But, hopefully you won&#39;t be having much more than a kick-a-bout on the lawn, unless it&#39;s really big. I think it&#39;s cool, although the astro-mower is taking it a bit far...i didn&#39;t even know they existed. A waste of electricity too, because i imagine it still has a motor to produce the sound or else it&#39;s pointless. well it&#39;s pointless anyways. i&#39;ve got a feeling you&#39;re pulling our collective legs over the mower part.

  8. Lounge   -   #8
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    Originally posted by lilmiss@25 June 2003 - 18:12
    fugley has more money than sense - discuss.

    next essay; fugley has more hair than sense - discus...ting.

    should&#39;ve bought a cow fugs, then you would only have to pick up cow-pats.
    Why thank for you kind response lilmissy ..... er I think

    I could perhaps buy a plastic cow and a plastic cow pat or two "Astro Turf Inc Corp"
    do have an accessories brochure - that&#39;s where I found the "Astro Turf Flymo".

    Apparently they do latex teen bellies too&#33;
    <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:red'>Mr Hand&#39;s Busy Right Now&#33; So Talk To Mr FOOKIN FINGER&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;</span></span>

  9. Lounge   -   #9
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    just plain f*ckin dumb

  10. Lounge   -   #10
    crazy_billy_bats's Avatar Poster
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    Originally posted by fugley@25 June 2003 - 18:17

    I could perhaps buy a plastic cow and a plastic cow pat or two "Astro Turf Inc Corp"
    To save that just drop your own load in the middle of the night or sumthin - authentic look and everything.

    Plus you&#39;ll save the 50p odd on plastic turds.

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