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Thread: Gender Differences In The Shower

  1. #1
    Poster
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,172
    > > > >How to Shower Like a Woman
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    > > > >
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    > > > >1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
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    > > > >hamper according to lights and darks.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you
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    > > > >see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make
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    > > > >mental note to do more sit-ups
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    > > > >
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    > > > >4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
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    > > > >cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
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    > > > >with 43 added vitamins.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with
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    > > > >natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for
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    > > > >10 minutes until red.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa
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    > > > >cake body wash.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >11. Shave armpits and legs.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >12. Turn off shower.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold
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    > > > > spots with Tilex.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a
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    > > > >small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and
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    > > > >towel on head.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any
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    > > > >exposed areas.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >
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    > > > >How To Shower Like a Man
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    > > > >
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    > > > >1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed
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    > > > >and leave them in a pile.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
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    > >wiener
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    > > > >at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the
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    > > > >size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >4. Get in the shower.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >5. Wash your face
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    > > > >
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    > > > >6. Wash your armpits.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound
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    > > > >in
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    > > > >the shower.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
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    > > > >stuck on the soap.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >11. Shampoo your hair.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >13. Pee.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor
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    > > > >because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light
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    > > > >and fan on.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If
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    > > > >you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo'
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    > > > >sound again.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >19. Throw wet towel on bed.
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    > > > >
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    > > > >If there is anyone one among you who did not laugh at
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    > > > >the truth behind this email, there is something so very wrong with you.

    Oops, Sorry...just noticed this has been posted before!!! But I love it!!

  2. Funny S**t   -   #2
    j2k4's Avatar en(un)lightened
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Oh, please...
    Posts
    15,254
    Exactly so.
    “Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that.” -George Carlin

  3. Funny S**t   -   #3
    Except for the woo woo sound, thats damn accurate

  4. Funny S**t   -   #4
    Poster
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,172
    LOL!!!! I doubt anyone would 'ADMIT' to the woo woo sound. ;-) The blowing the nose thing was enough to make me gag. ;-)

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