How To Get To Heaven When You Die

[Fromagepas]

I am greatly misinformed about Christianity.

To be fair on yourself you are making most of this stuff up.

It is however the normal type of nonsense one reads when an atheist pretends to be a Christian in order to mock Christians.

If it's amusing you, cool. Make the most of your three score and ten. One wouldn't want to waste one's entire existence.

[Barbarossa]

You are greatly misinformed about Christianity. I would like for you to show me what was borrowed from other religions, since I am the uniformed one here it shouldn't be a problem for you. Jesus Christ isn't like any of the false gods that preceded His comming to the earth.

You never said you wore a uniform!

To be fare, checkout girls at Asda wear a uniform, but they know fuck all about anything.


By the way, I have incontravertable proof that God does not exist, but you'll have to take my word for it

[rucka315]

Passover is the key to eternal life through Jesus's blood that was shed on the cross.

[Biggles]

SB

Shurley you are uniformed regarding Judaic El worship, the devolpment from Polytheism to Henotheistic beliefs, then to Monthestic beliefs? Christianity itself is an amalgam of Judaic beliefs, Zoariastrianism and European and Egyptian Pagan beliefs. Jesus himself refers to Satan as "the father of lies" which although not used in the OT was the Zoariastrian term for the "dark side". In the OT, Satan is a minor character who talks with Yahweh (Job). In Zoaristrian traditions he is almost equal with Mazda (the light side) and they are locked in fierce battle. Judiac death was Sheol - which was essentially a return to the dust and unknowing sleep. Zoariastrian death had Hell (lake of fire) and Heaven. Zoariastrianism was unitarian in that one's term in the fire was dependent on the level of naughtiness but that ultimately all are redeemed by a good toasting.

In Catholic and Orthodox traditions (the oldest and largest denominations) Mary has a prominent role. The cult of Isis was an important religion in the Roman times. Isis was Queen of Heaven and Star of the Sea. Many of her temples were converted into Churches and dedicated to Mary.

I could go on but what do I know

[Afronaut]

Nope I'm a scientologist. As long as my dues are paid the aliens will come and get me. J/k

more: http://enturbulation.org




xenu

[Pzero]

The tags are amazing...

[Snee]

You are greatly misinformed about Christianity. I would like for you to show me what was borrowed from other religions, since I am the uniformed one here it shouldn't be a problem for you. Jesus Christ isn't like any of the false gods that preceded His comming to the earth.

I just told you some of what was borrowed, and where from in the very post you replied to.

But, since that didn't take, you can start off reading what biggles said.

Then you can try reading Gilgamesh, for example, there are quite a few parallels that can be drawn from that to the old testament, which, btw, more or less is the hebrew/jewish bible.

Then there's hell, ie hades, niflheim, Di Yu, naraka etc.

And the Devil, ie Baal Sebui, Belial and so forth. Who is also something of a trickster-archetype, cf Jung.

Look hell up, even wikipedia has a decent grasp of who else believed in it. Same goes for heaven.

With regards to Jeebus, he comes off as a bit of a hindu avatar, and possibly the archetypical hero (think Gilgamesh again, who also possessed divine traits), with a pacifist-twist.


In short, if you actually took time to get an education, and maybe did a bit of reading and tried to think for yourself for a bit, rather than misinterpreted the bible and made christians look bad on the internet, you'd probably find that the bible in and of itself, just like christian faith is a mish-mash of archetypes and odds and ends borrowed from other places and religions, nicely rounded off with the disclaimer that everyone else is wrong, which really is a bit ironic, given the context.

Information about Jung's archetypes is available in any half-decent library, just as definitions of things like heaven and hell can be found in any encyclopedia, and are mentioned, with different names, in texts outdating both hebrew and christian bibles.

[FatBob]

if you fart real hard , you should be able to escape the earths gravity field and you will reach heaven

[chalice]

Nice post Snee, but why even bother with this twat.

He will select what he wants to absorb and fuck the rest in the bin.

We are just about the only forum on the interweb who will tolerate his bollocks. Throw him to the lions.

[Snee]

Don't get me wrong now, though, Fromage is most likely right, you are probably a full-blown idiot trolling and pretending to be a fundamentalist, which is to say that you are pretending to be someone slightly less apalling than you actually are, frodo.

Either that or you are more than a little bit thick, either way you aren't really accomplishing anything else than making people think that you in particular is an idiot who should shut the fuck up.